Okay so me and my bf have been going out almost a month. We have kissed but not french kissed yet. I have also told him that I am a virgin and I know he isn't but whenever someone brings up sex and I mention that I am a virgin he says that he can fix that. Meaning I guees that he wants to have sex with me. Know what I want to know is what I should do? I do like him and I am ready to have sex but I don't if I want it to be him. Also he is not pressuring me to have sex with him but he is being truthful when he says he can fix that. What should I doo about it. We have not gone out on a real date yet since I baby-sit all the time and my parents don't know. I am almost 17 and he is 15 and will turn 16 sometime next year. It is not only his age being under the age of consent that I don't want to sleep with him but I don't know if I really want him to be my first. If I ever do sleep with him I would wait till he is 16 or older. But what should I do also he is not pressuring me? HELP
2007-10-10 08:48:44 · 38 answers · asked by ? 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Also please no comments about GOD and wait till you are married. I am not religious and I don't want to wait till I am married just until I love the guy and I know that he loves me.
2007-10-10 08:53:16 · update #1
Also I don't know how many times I have to say this HE IS NOT PRESSURING ME INTO HAVING SEX WITH HIM. He mentions that he could fix that I am a virgin and I say no and he drops it and we talk about something else.
2007-10-10 08:56:48 · update #2
By law you have to be 16 in Mass to be consentual sex so no answers like "18 by law" cause it is 16. And I know this because I live with a cop and I looked it up online.
2007-10-10 09:11:34 · update #3
By law you have to be 16 in Mass to be consentual sex so no answers like "18 by law" cause it is 16. And I know this because I live with a cop and I looked it up online.
2007-10-10 09:12:14 · update #4
By law you have to be 16 in Mass to be consentual sex so no answers like "18 by law" cause it is 16. And I know this because I live with a cop and I looked it up online.
2007-10-10 09:12:28 · update #5
By law you have to be 16 in Mass to be consentual sex so no answers like "18 by law" cause it is 16. And I know this because I live with a cop and I looked it up online.
2007-10-10 09:12:35 · update #6
By law you have to be 16 in Mass to be consentual sex so no answers like "18 by law" cause it is 16. And I know this because I live with a cop and I looked it up online.
2007-10-10 09:12:57 · update #7
Sorry about adding the same comment 5 times. I though it was not added the first time
2007-10-10 09:24:28 · update #8
You should definitely wait until he is of the age of consent. Otherwise you could get in trouble.
Other than that, I think that many girls have this strange fantasy about their magical first. I can honestly say I've never met a woman who describes their first ever sex to be this blissful magical wonderful event. Most of them build it up to be something truly amazing to be shared with a true love. But the reality is that it will probably be short, painful and disappointing the first time around. Let's face facts, when was the last time you did something for the first time and were amazing at it.
Sex, like anything else takes practice to become good at it. Some people may have more natural aptitude for it than others, but it still is something that gets better with practice and experience.
So as such, as long as you care for the guy somewhat and as long as he is of legal age, I'd say go for it. Because when you finally meet the man of your dreams it would be good to be able to know what you are doing, and have figured out exactly what turns you on and what turns men on.
2007-10-10 08:52:04 · answer #1 · answered by ZCT 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
STOP and LISTEN. Do not and I mean DO NOT have sex with that boy and I'm going to tell you exactly why. You know why he answers that statement of "I'm a virgin" with I can fix that all the time is because thats all he thinks about. He's a 15 year old kid and his hormones all over the place. All he's thinking about right now is having sex. No boy at that age can be trusted with your virginity. I know I couldn't. I mean I feel for you girls cuz its hard enough trying to find a man thats worthy of your virginity. This is a very big decision for and should not be made solely on the fact that he's not of age yet. Another thing you only be with him for a month and also you haven't even really kissed him yet. Lets kiss him first before we let him get between ya legs. Also watch out for game. If this guy is anything like me, not pressuring you is just another way of getting you to do what he wants you to do. This means he's acting like he not worried about sex. Like the decision is all yours and he behind you 100% no matter what you decide. Actually he's plotting the whole time and as soon as you feel comfortable. Your gonna say yes we can have sex and it will happen and you won't hear from him for a while. So Lets wait a while and see if he sticks around for the long haul and maybe then give him the goods
2007-10-10 09:03:01 · answer #2 · answered by Richard J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should tell him straight that you don't like his comments about your virginity. This apply to all ages. Your sexuallity is a very private matter, and only you know what is to be released. I am a man, but i feel his comment is humilliating. Probably he means no offesnse and it comes from the fact that he is just an immature boy, who wants to mark his territory, and in such case I wouldn't be interested on him anyway. I don't know but if I were you I would make very clear that his remarkings are of the worst taste and that he should stop doing that if really interested. If he cares for you he will understand. If he gets angry or disappointed, well, it's because he just cares for himself and it is not likely your first time will be a constructive experience with him. I am pretty sure you will know what to do. There are a thousand million of handsome boys out there and you still have much time ahead for searching. Actually, sex is overrated. Believe me, if you have sex when it is not time yet, you will be very very very very very very sorry. Why don't you just wait a couple more years, in the meantime Enjoy the myriad of beatiful thing that life offers you.
2007-10-10 09:07:08 · answer #3 · answered by Manuelon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not have sex with someone just because they want you too! You do what you want to do when you are ready for it! Trust me if your not 100% sure that you are ready you will regret it! I definatly regret my first time and wish I would have listened to people who told me to wait. I know there is a lot of pressure to have sex so you will be "cool" but as I said before dont do anythng your not sure you are ready for. I would say make him wait for it...If he really cares about you he will wait. And if not then you will save yourself from making a big mistake! I know I probably sound like some old lady just trying to tell you what to do but I was in your place not too long ago and I know exactly what it is like! Sex is a very meaningful thing and should be with someone you love..not with some horny 15 year old! If you need any more advice or just want to talk about it feel free to email me! Sex is a big step girl!! Not saying dont do it...just make sure your ready for it! You will always remember your first time and you dont want it to be something you regret your whole life
2007-10-10 08:59:06 · answer #4 · answered by kimmiemer17 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't be sleeping around with guys when your only 16.
Why? Because you will mature over time, and ultimately become a lot more confident about what you really want in a relationship.
And when you are 25 or so, you will look back and say: Why the hell did I sleep with that guy when I was 16? That was pretty stupid on my part.
So you would only be cheating yourself. A "future you," who knows better than this 16 year old you. I know its hard to understand this when you are young; but your interests will change over time; and so you really need to plan for it accordingly right now.
If the guy is really "the guy," he will still be around when you reach that point.
2007-10-10 08:57:46 · answer #5 · answered by LuckyLavs 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
READ IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!!VIRGINITY is PURITY AND INNOCENCE are you ready for that to be taken away from you? Are you sure you are ready for apart of you to be taken away from someone that you do not love? Wouldn't you not rather want to experience it with someone that you love and care about? I think that if he says "I CAN FIX THAT" I think that is disrespecting you and shows he doesn't care, sorry but guys at that age are looking for a lay and if he sees that your just going with it and not setting ground rules and saying no or thinking differently well then he sees it that it's okay with you. Personally I think you shoudln't think about it before you act. Being a virgin is something to be proud alot everyday or less then that a girl is either raped or their virginity is lost because of weither its a newlywed couple, a desperate guy, a best friend, a stranger, or a boyfriend. All of these take away a girls only treasure the only thing that she can always have if she wants. CHOOSE WISELY!!!!
2007-10-10 09:00:06 · answer #6 · answered by Jane 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say don't sleep with him. You'll be glad you didn't give yourself to some random boy. Especially someone who is younger than you. A month is also soon to think of having sex with him especially as a 17 year old. When i was in highschool a good girl would wait 6months before sleeping with her bf. At least that gives time for the relationship to evolve above a physical fling.
good luck and if you do sleep with him use protection!
2007-10-10 08:54:23 · answer #7 · answered by coolchick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you want to have sex then you should, but all too many people, myself included, end up regretting sleeping with the person who takes their virginity. I think you guys should talk about it, go on some real dates, and decide whether or not you think there should be love involved. Also consider whether or not you really want to be his first. This is one of those things that once its done you can't take it back. the best advice i can give you is to TALK about it and make an educated decision.
2007-10-10 08:54:04 · answer #8 · answered by Abby S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK forget him. Sounds like he is making you a notch in his belt but also repecting you. Just when you talk about Sex that is when his character looks a little funny.
Good for you you are a virgin. He does not have to fix anything you are fine the way you are?
You sound like you are holding out for love. And what is up with the lack of Kissing! NO that is usually a bad sign to me. The fact that I think you are the person who needs to be in LOVE (like most girls) Means you should wait until you have no doubts in your mind and that this is something you want to share with someone you love.
Love defination is you cannot live without that person in your life...every breathe you take you take it for them. every thought in your head also considers them!
Do not doubt and I think he is too young for you!
2007-10-10 09:08:16 · answer #9 · answered by thewriterinny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, you're in a difficult situation at the mo! I can understand where you're coming from. Hun, it's so much better waiting for the right person, and you're both ready. It's brilliant you're being so sensible about it, and not rushing ahead with things. Take my advice - wait until you are totally and utterly sure, otherwise you will end up regretting it at some stage in your life when you do find that person. It's best to get to know this guy better, and if you're interested go on dates and introduce him to your parents. If then he seems still not to be the right person, then you know to wait for the right one.
2007-10-10 08:54:23 · answer #10 · answered by rachpower90 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋