I was really good mates with a guy and I then developed feelings for, he knew about this, and we still continued to be mates anyway, when i was really drunk on a night out I went and said that i thought that i loved him, and he said that he didnt understang why because I can do better than him, i understand that what i have done is really stupid and i dont even love him and i dont even know why i said it, but do you think that the friendship is likely to be ruined after what I said? what advice can anyone give so that i can sort this out with him? I really dont want to lose him as a mate. now he is ignoring my texts! xxx
2007-10-10 03:33:32 · 41 answers · asked by *kirsty* 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He should understand that people can get overly sappy when they're drunk and not take a drunk confession like that so seriously.
But if he doesn't, one idea might be to pretend that there's just a big misunderstanding going on. Explain to him that you DO love him, but that you're not IN love with him. Tell him you love lots of people because you're a loving sort of person. It's just that you don't go around telling everybody you love them when you're sober.
2007-10-10 03:38:52 · answer #1 · answered by Jonathan 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's going to be really embarrasing for you, but you need to corner him and explain yourself. Say, "I am sorry for what I said the other night...I DO love you, but purely as a friend. I just got confused because of the alcohol." However, his response to you about not being good enough for you makes me think that he actually is in love with you, and maybe that's why he's ignoring your texts- so he can have some time to think about what to do. It's best to nip this in the bud and just tell him the truth. It's a sucky situation, but I'm sure we've all done something similar.
2007-10-10 03:47:39 · answer #2 · answered by fizzygurrl1980 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We've all done it. Now, start talking and stop texting. Texting is for people who don't want to face what is going on. Get together in a situation where you don't necessarily need to be face to face eg. go for a walk, meet at the playground on the swings. Just explain you got a bit carried away, you don't want to ruin your friendship, and you understand there needs to be a cooling off period. Really listen to what he has to say. Then let the chips fall where they may. If he does not want to be friends anymore, you need to abide by his decision. Now that this has happened, learn from it, and don't do it again. It sounds like he is still talking to you, he just needs to know that you arn't going to get all weird again.
2007-10-10 03:43:23 · answer #3 · answered by always b natural 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I once told a friend of mine I loved him when I was drunk too.
To be honest, I don't think I did love him, and if I did, I don't think I would still be with him now.
I didn't realise, as he kept it a secret, that he had been seeing a girl from America for years and that they planned to get married when she was finished her education there! So he told me this. So I texted him saying well can we just forget about what I said, and he said yes, and to be honest, we have been great friends ever since, and I was even at his wedding to said American girl.
I think it takes a good man to see that a friendship isn't worth throwning away over a drunken confession!
2007-10-10 03:38:41 · answer #4 · answered by fire_woman_1978 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That sucks he is ignoring your texts!! I think you should talk to him in person and tell him that when you said that, that you were drunk. Tell him that you do care for him, but that you "sordof mis-spoke". Tell him that you don't want to lose his friendship, and that you are sorry that you made him uncomfortable. It is strange that his response was that you can do better than him.....maybe he really feels that way (low self esteem), so that is why he is avoiding you. But, if he really is your friend, than that shouldn't last.
2007-10-10 03:49:58 · answer #5 · answered by jillybean5415 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To profess undying love after perhaps consuming six double whiskeys,a couple of beers and five tequila slammers is a absolutely No No No.Could have been worse,you didnt want to sleep with him absolutely immediately! Try SMSing to explain your uncessarily behaviour downside.Next time try not create surprises with taste of melodrama.
2007-10-10 04:01:53 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop getting drunk and you will not be getting yourself in jams like this.
By the way, for the most part guys cannot be just friends. If you are in any way worth looking at, he will be attracted and things will start to happen. It is something that you cannot just turn off.
Move on!
2007-10-10 03:39:41 · answer #7 · answered by rapha_help 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him some space. Stop texting him. Send him a note telling him that you don't really feel that way.
Chances are he'll calm down if you leave him alone for a while. However the more you try to contact him the more he will start thinking psycho-b*tch.
2007-10-10 03:38:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just forget him at this point. He doesn't want to hear from you and pestering him isn't gonna get you anywhere. Just be cordial if you meet up with him, that's all. Maybe down the road you will be mates again.
2007-10-10 03:41:45 · answer #9 · answered by sailorboy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't make a big deal of it. The next time you see him, say something like "everyone says stupid things when they're drunk, they're not supposed to be taken seriously" - then change the subject.
I expect he's embarrassed, that's why he's ignoring your texts.
Leave him alone for a while, just say the above, when you see him next.
2007-10-10 03:39:27 · answer #10 · answered by jet-set 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋