I personally have never had the dream wedding in mind. I always knew I would have to pay for my own wedding, so I have always invisioned eloping in Vegas or having a court house wedding. My fiance just wants me to be happy, but I want both of our families to be happy. His mom has an issue with the fact that we want to go to the court house and later go somewhere by ourselves to share personal vowes. She wants us to at least have a small ceremony. I don't know what to do. My parents do not know we are getting married yet. They were married by a Justice of the Peace, so I'm not sure they will have a huge problem. I know my mom thinks expensive weddings are ridiculous. Another issue is that I have a 7 year old daughter who might get her feelings hurt if she isn't a flower girl... Please give me your thoughts and opinions. I know the ultimate conclusion is marriage, I just want everyone to be happy. I don't care how it happens as long as I'm married to my wonderful fiance!!!
2007-10-05 15:14:42 · 15 answers · asked by tarajg11 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Money is not a factor other than the fact that I hate the idea of spending so much money on one day...
2007-10-05 16:22:25 · update #1
Hi and congratulations!
You are smart not to be sucked into the bridal industry's idea of what you HAVE TO HAVE in order to have the "perfect day." That said, your post is a little sad to me as you say...."I just want everyone to be happy"....but you don't really say what YOU want that will make you happy.
Personally, I have to agree with your groom's mom. I think a SMALL ceremony would be nice. It can be simply family and/or a few friends too!!
There are many places other than a courthouse or Vegas to get married. I'm not putting those down, just saying, there are more options.
~ Is YOUR house big enough?
~ What about family - your groom's mom's home?
~ Another idea would be to have something at a small inn or a bed and breakfast? I think it would be so romantic to be married in front of a fireplace, but that's just me.
~ A justice of the peace or wedding officiant will come to YOUR venue....simply inquire as to their fee.
~ A small church wedding is nice also, if you are the "church goin kind". If not, there are sooooo many places to hold a wedding. Just look around in your area.
~ You can even get married at a restaurant in a private room and have a dinner reception right after.
~ Another idea is to not only have your daughter as a flower girl, but to involve her in the vows. Look online at examples of different vows with children.
~ I would buy a nice dress for you and your daughter. It doesn't need to be over the top....go to JCPenney, Kohls, etc.
~ Why not have 1 attendant each? A maid/matron of honor and a best man. Again, have THEM pick out something to wear. A nice dress for the girl and dress pants and shirt for the guy.
~ On your wedding day, why not make it special with your daughter. Possibly get your hair and nails done.....get dressed up....and enjoy your small (and budget friendly) wedding.
Best of luck to you in your decision!
2007-10-05 16:26:10 · answer #1 · answered by iloveweddings 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can still have a proper wedding, just make it simple and small with very close family and that way it can also be cheap too. If someone you know has a nice big enough house, you can ask them if it's OK to hold a small wedding there. Get the celebrant to go there and you can have just parents and siblings and close friends. Then after you can just have a nice sit down dinner there. It will work great if you have only like 20 people. Plus you can get decorations for cheap too to make it look nice. If I didn't have a good budget or didn't want anything huge, I would consider that. You can still wear a nice dress and have flowers, just don't worry about bridesmaids if you don't want. You can decorate an arch with flowers (hire them for cheap) to get married under then a few decorations inside will make it look great. It wouldn't cost much at all as it's only a bit more cost than hosting a big dinner party. Plus you would satisfy you MIL by having a wedding and satisfy your mother by not having a huge one. So everyone wins!
2007-10-05 16:06:11 · answer #2 · answered by BTB2211 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is your wedding so the ultimate decision is what you and your groom feel is the most appropriate for you and your budget. However, it is nice if possible to take into consideration the feelings for your family and to incorporate some of their ideas as well, if you can. You could easily have a small ceremony with just your parents and his parents to say your personal vows, that would have little effect on the budget for your big day.
2007-10-07 22:58:34 · answer #3 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you don't really care, everyone can easily be happy. His mom would be happy with a small ceremony, you don't seem to object to one, your parents probably would not mind, and everyone can be involved. You can have something small - even if it's just pretty much family. Does someone have a nice size living room or nice back yard? You don't even need a "wedding gown" You can get pretty party dresses about everywhere. At stores like Ross an Marshall's they have cheap (under $40) little girl dressy dresses that would be great.
2007-10-05 19:56:22 · answer #4 · answered by Asked and Answered 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should do a small ceremony to be honest. That way your daughter could be a flower girl, and then you could have only close friends and family invited to your wedding and it would still be very special and would be a little easier on the budget. I also think that doing a small reception in someones backyard or a park or even a club house would be fun, and you could cater food or have a barbeque or people could bring their own dishes, and do a buffet type thing. Good luck.
2007-10-05 18:05:29 · answer #5 · answered by coolliz2444 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get married by the Justice of the Peace , which is a small ceremony. That should please your future mother in law and your daughter can stand beside you with a few flowers and be a flower girl which will make her happy to be a part of the wedding. it doesn't have to be hugh just a quiet ceremony.
2007-10-05 15:27:37 · answer #6 · answered by SandyO 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My BF & I met online and we are getting married in August of next year. I am having my wedding at a beautiful hotel that resembles a castle. I am having an outdoor garden ceremony and an indoor reception. Hotel weddings are good for the couple that want a beautiful wedding without the high cost. I got a great deal for the wedding weekend that includes my rehearsal dinner, ceremony, reception, after wedding bruch, and rooms for my bridal & groom party. Thye gave us the bride and groom suite free. Thanks to my people on Yahoo Answers my colors are fuschia with lime green and tangering accents.
2016-04-07 06:33:51 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I went through the same thing. So we compromised....we got married at a church, and I had the dress and everything I envisioned, then we had a reception of 60 people in a hall above a bar (sounds tacky, but wasn't). Anyway, we are going to the islands next month and are going to get married again on our 1 year anniversary to have it our way...and I don't regreat a thing and can't wait.
2007-10-05 15:35:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey Love, I was in the same boat as you and we just recently a month ago got married in Jamaica and the wedding was beautiful!!!!!!!!! I was married at sunset meaning 5:30pm and my pictures are to die for! It was a three star resort but it was still very nice and there weddings were beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!! I can recommend you to Sunset Beach Resort and Spa If you care to view a few flicks to see for yourself e-mail me and I'll send you some flicks to see for yourself! A month after the wedding we did Budget Wedding Reception and that was beautiful as well!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I put the gown back on and my little bridal party dressed up again as well and we didn't brake the bank and it was beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Weddings are over-rated it's about what you want and nobody else!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My son is 6years old and he had a blast in Jamaica!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So I am sure your daughter would love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sharee911@aol.com that's my e-mail address if you want to see a few flicks!!!!!!!!!
2007-10-05 15:28:00 · answer #9 · answered by rita_hiemy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well is money a factor? Time? Venue? I personally think you can have a great wedding on a modest budget. YES if your baby girl wants to be the flower girl then go for it. This is about you and your fiancee,NOT his mother or your family. Make sure you doing this to please yourselves and not your families.
2007-10-05 16:13:21 · answer #10 · answered by navywife_2001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋