ok my fiance decided to pay for the wedding. but im worry about if the wedding is gonna be at his way.. meaning that he will make the selection from everything just bc hes the one paying it?
I wondering that bc my fiance pleases me alot but i would like the wedding my way (i know every women wants a big one) but i would be just happy celebrating outdoors over autumn foliaged (its gonna be in Scranton, PA) in a place where is outdoors/indoors. totally formal.
how can i talk about it with him? the wedding is very important for him (hes the first of getting in his family) and he have a HUGE family. from my part, it will be only atteding like proly 15 ppl or less.
2007-10-05 08:36:06 · 12 answers · asked by *live,laugh,love* 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
its just attending a few ppl bc most of my family live in Dominican republic and they don't have visa.
2007-10-05 08:38:02 · update #1
It doesn't sound like you and your husband have a good communication thing going on. You should be discussing this with him, not us. You need to ask him what he has in mind and see if you guys are on the same page.
2007-10-05 08:39:56 · answer #1 · answered by Paula Christine 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I would start by telling him that it is great that he wants to pay for everything so no other family member will have to help. That you hope that you can come to decisions together regarding all of the wedding details, so that you are both happy with the outcome. (The whole point of being married is to be and work together as a couple, make decisions together, etc.)
This sounds like a lifestyle thing though...have you two decided to keep your monies separate, not combined? While this is perfectly fine, you still have to decide how things are payed for with that money -and it goes for the wedding also.
There is no reason why two people who love each other and want to get married cannot make every decision about the wedding plans together - or divy it up so you get to make some decisions about certain things (flowers, menu, etc.) and he others (venue, dj, etc.)
2007-10-05 15:53:06 · answer #2 · answered by SisterSue 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you can't communicate with him about something like that, you are so not ready to marry him. Marriage needs a comfort level that lets you discuss MUCH more important things than venues, centerpieces and the ever-popular Jordan almonds in a teeny little bag as wedding favors.
Go to him, say "we need to talk" and go from there.
Bonus hint: WE need to talk means BOTH of you need to do some talking and BOTH of you need to do some listening. Take turns and play nice.
2007-10-05 18:44:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see BIG red flags here honey. You are hooked up with a controling person and things are only gonna get worse after the wedding. What do you mean how can you talk to him abotu this? If you can't talk to him about what you, the bride, wants for her own wedding, you do not need to be marrying this man or anyone for that matter. If you can't speak up now, prepare to be a doormat that only needs to say Yes dear.
2007-10-05 15:45:02 · answer #4 · answered by CindyLu 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you can't talk openly and honestly with your boyfriend about your wedding arrangements then are you really ready to marry him?
If you are hesitant about discussing the arrangements then how are you going to discuss even more difficult issues that will come up once you are married?
The foundation for any good relationship, whether spouses, parents/kids, employer/employee is based on being able to communicate.
2007-10-05 15:49:08 · answer #5 · answered by Vera C 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't feel comfortable discussng the wedding plans with him, how are ypou going to feel about discussing how your marriage is going to be after the wedding? If he pays for
everything after the wedding, then does he get to decide how it goes? Where you will live, what you will wear, what you will cook, etc. You have to have an understanding before the
wedding, or you will feel trapped.
2007-10-05 15:45:13 · answer #6 · answered by M S 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him, tell him your concerns. The wedding day is for both of you, he shouldnt lose sight of that.
Tell him what you want, it sounds like you are not asking much. He can then combine your ideas with his plans for the day, making it a joint effort.
Enjoy it.....not many women get their man willing to pay for and plan the whole day!
2007-10-05 16:59:45 · answer #7 · answered by bluegirl6 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
GG every American is a custom to havin a large wedding.
I think it is safe to assume that since he from a large family he knows what he is getting into by offering to pay for the wedding and that he is prepared for this.
You should tell him up you are worried that it is going to a burden. And you love him so much for taking up this.
Then show him your plans. :)
getem girl
2007-10-05 16:03:05 · answer #8 · answered by l33nix 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The bride IS the wedding.
Your way or no way. With in reason of course.
Keep in mind though--a bad wedding makes for a bad marriage. Consider his feelings in your plans.
2007-10-05 15:47:01 · answer #9 · answered by Fred F 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Soriano...is that you up there???
Talk to your man about things you would like in your wedding and communicate with him abut what your likes/dislikes are. It's BOTH of your wedding. You should both have input! :)
2007-10-05 15:41:30 · answer #10 · answered by Mimi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋