My friend is moving to North Carolina and I do have strong feelings for him, but I live with my mom and him at the moment. He has invited me to come live with him in N.C. when he moves down there. My mom does need help and to be watched over, not in a medical sense, and she constantly gives me guilt trips if I do something for myself and not her needs first. What should I do, stay with my mom once she moves out of her house or move with my friend??
2007-10-05 03:00:07 · 7 answers · asked by Desi 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
If over 18. Move with your friend. It is time to start your own life. mom needs to grow up and stop the guilt trip games.
2007-10-05 03:04:12 · answer #1 · answered by Bob D 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
GO and live YOUR LIFE!
You are not responsible for your mother, and guilt trips are unnecessary.
Guilt is for criminals... and no one else.. YOU are NOT a criminal and have done nothing wrong. It's perfectly acceptable to live your own life, and do what is best for YOU.
When we constantly put the needs of other adults before our own, we are probably codependent. When we do things for other adults which they are perfectly capable of doing for themselves, we are codependent.
If you are unsure what codependency is, you can do a yahoo search.. lots of information.
Hon, take care of YOU.. no one else will. Your mother needs to grow UP and get a grip...
Move to North Carolina if that is where your heart belongs.
2007-10-05 10:18:33 · answer #2 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
move with your friend
sorry babe but your mom should not be guilt tripping you
you cant put your life on hold for your mom its up to her o look after herself you got your own life and family to think about
parents do notn have kids so they have someone to look after them they have them to continue the family line
you will have kids and they wi,l move on to have their own
if you let your mom guilt trip you then you'll end up being her lap dog till she dies and then completely alone cause you havent had the opportunity to have a life of your ownb
i think the further you get away from your mom the better you can both grow then
you need to live your life now
fly the nest
2007-10-05 10:05:35 · answer #3 · answered by leelu 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should move from your mother's home if you are 18+. I don't think that moving with your friend is a good idea if you aren't already in a relationship with him. Plus if you are in a relationship then you must also consider how long you two have been together. Speaking from personal experience, I moved in with my now ex bf after only knowing him for about 6 mos and it all went to hell.
2007-10-05 10:09:55 · answer #4 · answered by Jennifer S 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's a tough question, if your mother is totally capable of caring for herself and just wants you there for her own personal reasons then you need to think about what is best for you. I mean that would be kind of selfish for your mom to do that. However, if she really need you there to care for her because she can not do it on her own whether it's medical or some other personal reason. Then you should be there for your mother, because we only have one mother and I'm sure she's sacrificed a lot for you, so she would deserve the same in return.
2007-10-05 10:08:12 · answer #5 · answered by So Fly 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, I didn't hear you say husband you stated "friend". Your mom is trying to fight the empty nest syndrome and she will do her best to make you feel guilty about moving away. If your relationship with your friend is serious then move. If not stay.
2007-10-05 10:09:05 · answer #6 · answered by Kaya M 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont ever move anywhere for a guy..you will be sorry
2007-10-05 10:06:03 · answer #7 · answered by Ray Puto 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋