Fall is in the Air
Air filled with the splendid colors of leafs that gave me the pleasure of their last memories
Memories of my childhood jumping into leafs that had changed from green to the colors of the rainbow
Rainbow pile of leafs a reflection of who I am now
Now I remember compassion of song
Singing in my fathers church choir
Choir where my friends and I laughed and teased each other before walking up the stairs where we would perform
Performing expressions of what we were taught while expressing myself with my own interpretation of love and music
Music that filled my soul with purpose and being
Being me different but without peace
Peace that is indifferent with childhood memories
Memories that bring back thoughts of apple bobbing
Bobbing for apples that fell from my grandfathers orchard trees
Trees where me and my brother climbed
Climbed up a rock hill where I fell while laughing at my brother's laughter
Laughter that paused for a short time when he passed
Passed to a better place a place where heaven is always fall
Fall my heart went when my grandmother passed
Passed was the blackberry cobbler's she would no longer serve
Served my grandfather a plate of BBQ a few months before he passed
Passing barbecue ribs and pictures of my pets while he sat in slumber not knowing first who I was but shared a story of his admiration of his brother that planted tomato plants where the rain water fell from the house gutters
Gutters not too far from where my great uncle hung himself a few years after his wife passed
Passed family members like the falling leafs of fall
Fall to me is a remembrance of the past
Past me a child remembering my grandfather’s wise words "be a peace maker" and "get a job in a office" words that I followed
Following him in his footsteps he was a WW2 vet and I took an office job in the Marines
Marines where I discovered myself a gay man with a purpose in life
Life me a person that has a love for the passing of one season to another
Another season approaches but I want to stay here in fall
Fall where the air is cool and crisp where my memories are clear
Clear is my love of fall
Fall gives reflection of my childhood
Childhood filled with bad and good
Good thanksgiving dinners where my family appeared happy and cheerful
Cheerful despite the the pain and suffering we experienced being poor
Poor wearing bread sacks over my shoes to protect my feet from the snow
Snow that made my walk to the barn difficult but the beauty of the snow was so overwhelming that my feet felt warm
Soul my mother's love that is unconditional though she lost the love of my father
Father that chose pride and greed over a his own family
Family that persevered through hardship
Hardship a memory still felt but is blinded by my love of fall and my memories of happiness
Happiness me a person that loves fall
Fall a passage from old to new
New me a new beginning.
2007-09-28
22:13:58
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