About 10 months ago me and my husband seperated he cheadted on me with a 19 year old girl. Two months later they moved in togther. At first my 4 yeard old would visit him but not sleep there, thne a couple months went by and she started to sleep over. Now she won't go with him at all. He is not concistent on visiting them the last time he seen them was 3 weeks ago? We also have a ten year old who will go but complains about it. I am not sure waht to do HELP?
2007-09-28 07:45:32 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
I went through a similar situation with my children,I put them in counseling and found out the reasons they didn't want to go,the reasons were justifiable and I don't push them to go anymore.I figured he would either grow up and realize his childish ways or lose them through his actions,children aren't always able to talk to their parents about how they feel without feeling like their going to hurt someone with what they have to say,I suggest you take them to counseling,they've been through alot and probably have alot of anger and resentment,thy need someone to help them get through this,they may or may not ever want to go with him but they will be the ones to make that decision,never ever push a child to do something they dont want to ,there may be a reason for their behavior,maybe something is going on with them that they aren't comfortable with. find out and protect your children.
2007-09-28 08:00:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's funny because your story is almost exactly like mine. My son is 4 and his father and I seperated and divorced when he was 1 1/2 years old. However, because his dad is always at work and shoving our son of onto others whenever he can, he has almost severed the relationship that they once had. My son does not want to go to his fathers and for good reason. He gets absolutely no attention when he is there. I would definitly talk to both of your children and try to come to a conclusion as to why.
Good luck and stay strong for your children!!
2007-09-28 10:40:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If court odered to visist father, well unfortunetly they have no choice, when my parents split, I had to visit the dirt bag untill I was 13. Everyother weekend I had to put up with his bull crap. So I know how your kids feel on some level. But if it's not court ordered, I would maybe talk to him or talk to your kids and see what the problem is. And go from there. Good luck, these situtions always seem to test parents, keep your head up.
2007-09-28 08:07:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It was the same for me when i was little - i wold be all ready for a sleepover weekend at dads and late friday night i would freak out and call home to mom and have her pick me up. I was not comfortable with my dad either - IDK exactly why, but I do think it is normal for kids going thru this stressful change. The same occured when he found a new g/f a few yrs later and i had sleepovers there - it was terrible and I hated it. He didnt spend much time with me anyways... always with the crazy g/f.... I would ask him/her what about going their is scary or uncomfortable... try spending time with him and you together at a public park to ease the transition from being together to being separated... my b/f and his ex do that with his daughter - i dont mind because it is THEIR child TOGETHER... it will take a long time for the child to get used to it - it took my b/f's daughter at least 4 months to even tolerate being at our home... with me there or not.
2007-09-28 08:00:53 · answer #4 · answered by asweetangelseyes 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well a four year old should not be the boss! talk to her and ask why she does not want to see her dad anymore and ask the 10 year old also.if they being treated bad or they are around drinking or drugs or whatever you need to know.if they are just being spoiled kids who think everything is about them put a stop to it now!!your ex sounds like a jerk but he is their dad.talk to him and see if his girlfriend just doesn't like the kids or what the deal is!! maybe he should spend some time with the kids alone,without her or you and try to be a good father.if he is not a good dad do not push it.do not talk bad around the kids about him and his trampy girlfriend either.also tell him that he and his new friend should not talk bad about you either!good luck.
2007-09-28 08:01:28 · answer #5 · answered by dixie58 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh god. My parents divorced when i was 2. Maybe one of them saw something they shouldn't have (if u no wat i mean) sick but true ask the ten year old.
2007-09-28 13:30:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋