The guy im 'with' told me the other day that he'd like it if i lost some more weight, as he normally goes for slim/slender girls,but made an exception with me cause of my personality, face and intellect!! Im about 5'7" and inbetween 12-14 (UK), so basically have hips and boobs!
Am i right to react a bit shocked by this??
2007-09-28 06:43:37 · 53 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yes, very right to be shocked, this sounds like someone trying to change you to the stereo type he is used to.
If you were seriously overweight and he had your health at heart, I might understand it, but if that is the case there are better ways to broach the subject.
I think I would be inclined to tell him where to get off, after all if you lose weight for him, what will he want next?
Good luck
2007-09-28 06:51:05 · answer #1 · answered by Tom M 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Are you certain it is the courting you favor to be in? i'm no longer speaking about his weight both. i'm speaking about the actual incontrovertible truth that he says such gruesome issues about females. What if down the line you grew to change into heavy and undeserving for some clinical reason? He would not sound like a kind, compassionate guy. believe me when I allow you to understand that the burden element will in worry-free words worsen down the line in case you get married. Why might want to he drop pounds as your husband if he would not care the way you experience about him as a boyfriend! Please!! he will have you ever then--performed deal--there is only no longer any incentive to take the time. as well...if he's taking no delight in his visual attraction and wellbeing now, he received't once you're married. i'm no longer criticizing him because of his weight--do not imagine that! every person can enable themselves pass briefly, yet you've made it sparkling the way it makes you experience in the direction of him and he's not any longer making an attempt. the actual incontrovertible truth that you favor to preserve your self might want to be the perfect incentive for him IF he replaced into ever going to take the time! This has T-R-O-U-B-L-E throughout it and also you're on the dropping end! come across a boyfriend who's type, compassionate in the direction of others, attracted to what you imagine of him, and who needs to steer a healthful existence form NOW and not some phantom time body down the line! sturdy success--you're too sturdy for this guy! Set your internet sites larger and are available across a sturdy function sort on your newborn.
2016-10-20 03:49:02 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're weight puts you into an un-healthy category... then he's doing you a favor with a little bit of criticism.
Otherwise, he's just being picky & slapping you across the ego (might be going for that backhanded compliment & missing, too). Remember - criticism about a person's body is a two-edged sword. (I'm sure he could use a few trips to the gym to tone up as well)
2007-09-28 06:49:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely be shocked!!!!!!! That "weight" aka curves he thinks you should lose is what is going to have the men crying over you when you get a bit older. Younger men have no idea about curves mama... so for now the only weight you need to lose is the dead weight of this loser. He is obviously aware a how fantastic you are.. unfortunately he has shown you just how NOT fantastic he is. Be happy with you exactly how you are!!
2007-09-28 06:53:33 · answer #4 · answered by Lady 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm 5'4" and the same - 12 to 14 size.I do want to lose a bit more but I would NEVER like it if a boy asked me to lose weight.It's like he's trying to create his perfect woman.I'm not surprised that you're shocked.It's not like 12-14 is huge!!I'd never lose weight for a bloke.Not even brad pitt (but that would give me a good incentive!).But seriously, I think blokes who like slim girls or boobs or **** will only really like slim girls/boobs/**** - it's just how they are made.Can you help who you like?Like some of the other answers said - only do it for yourself IF you want to.Otherwise find someone who loves you for you regardless.
2007-09-28 07:06:41 · answer #5 · answered by claire r 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him. Three reasons:
1. If he just sprung this on you from out of the blue, that is ridiculously rude.
2. He knew who you were when you started dating and now he wants you to change?? What next!!??
3. A person that truly cares for you would never say something like this, especially when you are very comfortable with who you are.
2007-09-28 06:51:01 · answer #6 · answered by tinyavenger 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well yes - because he is going out with you; but then how is he? i mean does he have a great physique/ and if he does - i guess it wouldnt matter if you lost a little -
i know alot of girls (if not all) are going to say - its not about looks - but be realistic - almost everyone is shallow to a certain extent - and whats not to like -- (you buy a car that you think looks good, same with house, and clothes -- its makes people human)
anyways point being, if he makes it too much of a big deal then he has some issues to deal with; but if he just mentioned it - there is nothing wrong with loosing a few kg(s) / lbs - more for yourself than for HIM !!
2007-09-28 06:54:13 · answer #7 · answered by cypherkin 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are a nice build, tell him to get lost, I have written a book about my ups and downs in life after falling in and out of love so many times, also divorced twice and had to move out that upset my kids and turned me to drink but now I no longer drink, so I did a book to help others out there, who like me was cheated and used, Publishers spent money to do my book and is out in 106, also on most book shops and sites in UK, so I am not trying to get you to buy my book but it is a fact it will help you, it is full of good advice and called, =
(A Serial Shaggers Guide to Internet dating, My 1001 lovers), By Me, Author Clive Worth, Published named it this to get it to sell,
2007-10-02 03:00:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he didn't care about the weight he wouldn't even say that. You have every right to be kinda shocked about it. You should lose weight for you or your health...no other reason and for nobody else. You should decide if you wanna lose it or not. Use your own judgement. Good luck.
2007-09-28 06:50:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can you pinch more than an inch? The 'pinch an inch' rule on your abdomen side is a good rule of thumb (now a forgotten standard). If you can pinch more than an inch you should consider loosing a little weight through excersise. Logically, you can only be upset because you believe you are a bit chunky and you worry about your weight. You boyfriend's opinion is a little irrelavent. Your should look to be happy in yourself and the 'pinch an inch' is a good reference.
2007-09-28 06:51:47 · answer #10 · answered by interested_party 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋