I'm still youngish and maybe my mind will change but as far back as I can remember I have not really wanted kids.
I've never googood over babies, never felt broody and always knew that I'd never pursue a baby down every possible avenue (meaning if it didn't come naturally I wouldn't go for IVF etc)
My question is, hopefully to someone who's been there, how valid/genuine are these feelings? Is it possible to instinctively feel that something is just not a good idea for you when it concerns such a big issue? If this is the case, is there still a regret once the chance to reproduce is well and truly gone?
2007-09-28 04:19:29 · 10 answers · asked by Elle Dee 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You don't have to want kids and don't let anyone tell you your life is incomplete without them. That's your choice and it's your life. My best friend since highschool (we are not in our late 30s) said she never wanted children...she still says the same thing today.
2007-09-28 04:22:45 · answer #1 · answered by CC 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
This is such a good question. I knew when I was 14 that I wanted a really large family and I could never understand people who didn't want children. I thought 'everybody' felt like me. However my brothers haven't had any children with their partners because they are too busy 'doing their own thing' and are perfectly happy, so I understand it more now. They can go on holiday when they want, go out till 3am, fish all weekend etc...
However after having 5 children I decided that was enough, and that I had finished with my baby days. NOTHING could have persuaded me to do it again. People around me were having babies and I felt nothing for them. Not one single ounce of broodiness. I couldn't have imagined anything worse. And that went on for years, with me pitying pregnant women.
The funny thing is 8 years after my 5th child was born I was suddenly overwhelmed with an urge to start all over again. And here I am expecting my 7th and loving every minute of it (And there will hopefully be an 8th!)
For all those years I wouldn't have done it again for a million pounds, and just like that I changed my mind. I think it may have been my biological clock talking to me.
All I can say is NEVER SAY NEVER.
2007-09-28 04:58:50 · answer #2 · answered by lilmissdisorganised 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have been married for 15 years and neither me or my husband want children. I do have moments that I wonder about having kids, but it doesn't last long. I am just like you- I never really wanted children. The only thing that drives you nuts is how people treat you. If you tell someone you aren't going to have children they act like you have two heads. My family is fine, but my husband's family isn't so great. My sister-in-law makes it very clear that she thinks we are making a mistake. I don't know why she cares. I think my husband and I are closer because we don't have children. Enjoy your life and know that it is perfectly normal to feel this way.
2007-09-28 10:33:03 · answer #3 · answered by luv_ofmusic 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wished I had this feeling before I got married and have kids. I have kids yet, if I can turn back time, I wished I do not have kids at all.
Save your money fo your retirement. You needed it more than having kids.
Kids are investment they say, I do not believe that. I am not living with or taking care of my mother so, I am a failure dutiful daughter. My time and income were spent mostly on my kids. And when they grow up, they will definitely leave me. Love, that is, that causes all this and to love is to sacrifice. If you have that feeling, then have kids. If not, just love yourself.
2007-09-28 04:37:16 · answer #4 · answered by leandra x 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not all women have to feel the need for having children. I get that issue pushed on me all the time by my family and it really irritates me to no end! Only you know exactly what you want out of life, don't let people push you into feeling a certain way.
2007-09-28 04:26:55 · answer #5 · answered by Chelley 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I never really wanted children. I lived on my own until I was 40, and I was single. I never really had maternal instincts, and knew that I would not be able to provide for a child. So, I just dote on my neices and nephews. It is perfectly fine to not want children. As you said, someday you may change your mind. Had I met my husband when I was younger, well, maybe I would have wanted children. But you need to be ready and willing....if you know what I mean.
YOUR FEELINGS NOT ONLY NORMAL, THEY ARE OK!!!!!!!
2007-09-28 04:25:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
I love kids, but I don't want any children of my own because I don't want to lose my figure and I worked so hard to get to where I am today-physically! Besides, my boyfriend has three boys from a previous relationship and three children is enough! I don't want to add on anymore! No one can't force you to have children and its a decision that you can make on your own free will!
2007-09-28 07:24:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are definitely people who choose not to have children and that is the right choice for them. You don't have to question your feelings as weird or unnatural. Your feelings are your own, and they are completely valid.
2007-09-28 04:25:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
Hi.. i have two friends who never had kids, and didn't want any. they don't hate kids, but they had other ambitions in their lives.
everyone has their own, personal desires and lifestyle. nothing wrong with doing what you feel is best for yourself.
2007-09-28 06:04:46 · answer #9 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes.....Lot's of people.
2007-09-28 04:23:41 · answer #10 · answered by maharg 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋