Anyone else having issues with other girls trying on your engagement ring? I've taken my ring off a couple of times to let some friends get a better look at it, and almost every time someone attempts to try it on. (WITHOUT ASKING!)
It just bugs me! I know some people even think it's bad luck.
To me, it's like when people go up and rub a pregnant lady's belly without asking!
Am I being selfish? I really don't want MY engagement ring on anyone else's finger, and I ESPECIALLY don't want it on there without the person asking first.
Am I over reacting?
2007-09-25 02:17:31 · 35 answers · asked by Mrs.10/18/08 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
My question came off sounding a little b!tchy. I'm really not. My issue with it is that to me, that ring is very special. It was an intimate gift from my fiance to me. I just don't think that people should assume that they have a right to try it on.
I don't mind taking it off to let someone get a better look at it - it's beautiful and I'm proud to show it off. I just wish that people would ask me before they go ahead and slip it on.
That's all.
2007-09-25 02:26:08 · update #1
Sorry to keep adding details.
After it happened once or twice, I did start asking people not to try it on before they handled it. I guess my whole point is that it's just rude to do it without asking.
And I hear all of you who say never to take it off...thanks.
2007-09-25 02:30:37 · update #2
OMG...I totally agree with you. I hate that...and so I stopped removing my ring. When someone asks to "see" my ring, I hold out my hand...SEEING it involves the eyes...and does not require me to remove it so you can wear it. My ring does not need to be used for the unmarried to imagine a ring on their own fingers.
I completely agree with the "pregnant lady's belly" comment too. I have had friends who complained about this the whole time they were pregnant. Someone would not even CONSIDER walking up to a stranger and rubbing her stomach when she wasn't pregnant...just because she is pregnant, that doesn't change...You have no right to touch someone without their permission.
No, you are not being selfish, and you are not overreacting. People can be thoughtless, although I believe it is rarely intended to be rude...they just don't think!
Much love dear,
~Kat
2007-09-25 07:15:04 · answer #1 · answered by Kat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I personally don't like it if someone trys on my engagement ring either. I don't take mine off that much but I would so people could get a good look at it. I don't remember too many people trying it on but if they did they asked and it was only my very close friends. I feel naked without my ring on! I agree that they should ask, you wouldn't look at someone's shirt that they had bought and then try it on just to see how it looked without asking would you? Certain things bug certain people so I think you have the right to request that they don't try it on. I started just showing them my hand and let them look at it that way. I have been engaged for a long time now so I don't get this much anymore.
2007-09-25 09:22:14 · answer #2 · answered by rate86 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you're overreacting, in my opinion. To be honest, I've never heard of anyone doing something so rude! There's no way I'd ever ask another girl to take off her engagement ring in the first place! Not to mention actually putting it on! And why do they need to look at it in detail? Are they trying to see if they can tell if it's real or not? I'd find that pretty insulting.
I've asked friends of mine who've gotten engaged if I can see their rings, but the closest I've ever gotten to the actual ring is taking the girl's hand and pulling it a little bit closer to my face to see a little of the detail. I don't do it so long that I come off as a wanna-be jeweler, but I don't do it for so short a time that I look uninterested.
Some people just have no tact! The next time someone asks you to take off your ring, tell them you're really superstitious and it's bad luck to take it off (that really is a superstition, btw).
2007-09-25 02:29:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Honey I know where you are coming from. It's to the point now where I don't even let people look at it anymore. I never really took mine off to show people, the people would (without asking) take it off my hand while they were looking, just snatch it off. You are not over reacting in any way. The ring is a symbol of your love and future for you and your fiance, for other people to try it on in a way devalues what it stands for. Don't be afraid to tell people "do not try it on". Be frank "I am not going to take it off for you to look at if you are going to try it on" That seems to be working for me. Most people will understand, in fact most people don't even realize they are doing anything wrong. Congrats on your engagement!!! Hope this helps.
2007-09-25 05:56:27 · answer #4 · answered by akr_86 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is no reason for you to ever take your ring off. It is yours. Other people can go to a jewelry store if they want to see what they would look like with one on.
I personally don't like it when girls show off their engagement ring. It looks like all they are interested in is the ring. Thankfully, my wife never wanted one. She said she didn't need a ring until we were married. She preferred to spend that money on things we really needed. She didn't want a fancy wedding either. Gee, we had a wonderful marriage and I knew she loved me more than "stuff" that I might give her. I know others who bought their wives expensive engagement rings, had a huge wedding, started out with big homes and expensive cars - but their marriages didn't last.
Keep your ring on your finger and talk about the man in your life rather than showing off that ring.
2007-09-25 02:28:43 · answer #5 · answered by Bud B 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you don't want your engagement ring on someone else's finger, then I suggest you not take it off to allow a better look! Just explain to them that, although it may sound a little kooky to them, you believe it to be bad luck for someone else to wear your ring, no matter how briefly it is on their finger. I wouldn't necessarily compare it to rubbing a pregnant woman's belly without asking as you have already removed the ring to allow better inspection. And it's always seemed like a natural thing to do if someone hands over their ring for you to look. At least I don't have to remove mine for better inspection (fiance definitely overspent).
2007-09-25 02:28:38 · answer #6 · answered by Sunidaze 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I never take my ring off so people can get a better view. They can look at it on my finger or not at all. Been married 7 years. The only time I take it off is to have it cleaned.
2007-09-25 02:26:52 · answer #7 · answered by momof3 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think u may be over reacting slightly but if i were in ur position i cant say i wouldnt do the same thing. and ill admit ive been guilty of the other girls position as well..not with engagement rings but if they have jewlery or even shoes on that i like i will try them on just to see how they look on me to see if that style suits me...alot of things that look good in boxes and on other people just dont look right on me so i try stuff on to get a better feel for what looks good and what doesnt...if its really bothering u..instead of taking it off completly then just hold ur hand up and let them grab ur hand to get a better look...if they insist on seeing it explain that u just got it cleaned and ur trying to keep smudges and fingerprints off the diamond...good luck and congrats!!
look at it this way..they may have worn the ring for 5 minutes but ur wearing it forever and u got the man!!
2007-09-25 03:21:04 · answer #8 · answered by jennybean7985 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If I were you I just wouldnt take it off. If it means that much to you, then dont let others try it on, and you are right to worry; it could get stuck or damaged. I would just show the ring, like on the hand but show. LIke that old saying your mom always told you, look with your eyes and not with your hands.
2007-09-25 02:27:42 · answer #9 · answered by Jen H 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Stop taking it off! If you don't want anyone else to try it on, why in the world would you take it off for someone to get a better look? If they want a better look, shove your hand in their face, hand them a magnifying glass, anything but take it off.
I have never had mine off of my hand unless it's in my own home. But never in anyone else's hands.
I also did not have anyone TOUCH me when I was pregnant. I had TONS of questions and comments that bugged me, but if someone would have TOUCHED me, they would have gotten slapped.
You've got to protect your own personal space. If you hand your ring to anyone for any reason (other than the jeweler to clean, size, or fix) you are just asking for trouble.
2007-09-25 02:31:37 · answer #10 · answered by Proud Momma 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋