Tell me what you think of this paragraph:
If the magical power of HMS is great enough to turn less-than-mediocre drivers, like Jeff Gordon and Jimmie Johnson, into champions, think what it can do with Dale Earnhardt, Jr, the greatest driver in all the many Universes. In fact, Jr. will be so good that NASCAR will make a new rule that says that once a car is twenty laps ahead of all the others, every lap until the end of the race will be counted as a victory. Therefore, it won't just be thirty-six Cup races Jr. wins next year, he'll be awarded with 112 victories, the most ever in one season. And, he won't ever have to worry about sponsorship again, because he'll be sponsored by God.
Add to it if you wish.
2007-09-24 01:24:53 · 9 answers · asked by jgrevinjim 3 in Sports ➔ Auto Racing ➔ NASCAR
New--the story behind this question.
I am not a Jr. basher. However, after I wrote, in my blog, a sentence beginning, "If Jr. doesn't win..." and immediately was labeled a "basher" by someone who left a comment.
"There will be no more 'If Jr. doesn't win.' You and all the other bashers will be sorry. Then, good luck to you."
I was surprised and amused, because for weeks I have been touting Jr's amazing car control ability, even writing, "he's every bit as good as Stewart, Kenseth, and Gordon."
It was that comment that inspired me to write this question. It is satire, a joke, and I was testing the waters. There are some thin-skinned fans out there.
2007-09-25 20:05:24 · update #1
Due to his record 112 victories and his sponsorship from God, he will have more money than God. With money in hand, he will return to DEI, buy it back from Teresa and send her to ghettos of North Carolina.
During the off season, he will end the war in Iraq by single handedly defeating Al Qedia, and bring peace to the whole Mid-East.
2007-09-24 02:45:46 · answer #1 · answered by Crazy Ant 5 · 2⤊ 4⤋
But then he will make a deal with the devil, as he has shown he has no loyalty even to the name that made him what he is. After selling his soul to satin he will win even more. He is actually going to win the CUP, Busch, Truck, Mods, ARCA and, USAC Triple Crown. He will also win Tony Stewarts Charity Race and the IROC. He will form his own team Satin Jr. enterprise. He is going to win all the races at the Olympics, will out run Schmaker in Formula 1, win the Lemans, then just to show he is the best at everything he will do a double back flip off of the car to out do Carl Edwards and climb the Fence with a single hand to out do Tony Stewart. Ohh and he will also beat out Lightning McQueen for the Piston Cup.
2007-09-24 11:26:23 · answer #2 · answered by RaceNut17 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I think you are nuts. This is beyond rediculous, bordering on blaspheme! Just because we believe in God, doesn't mean we're stupid!
Go Jr.>>>>
2007-09-24 15:33:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
"Many universes" is a contradictory statement. A better term would be Multiverse. That's all I'm gonna say about this crap.
2007-09-24 13:19:06 · answer #4 · answered by tuberk768 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
wow that is deep...those must have been some powerful drugs
2007-09-24 12:30:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
lol...thats so weird. I think you have been drinking to many bud's.
2007-09-24 14:02:27 · answer #6 · answered by Go Team Penske 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
...drinking too many buds or smoking too many??!!
2007-09-24 14:10:13 · answer #7 · answered by Honey 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
JR BLOWS!!!
2007-09-24 15:29:30 · answer #8 · answered by heywood jablome 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
That is the STUPIDEST thing i have ever heard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-09-24 09:34:16 · answer #9 · answered by Jacob K 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋