I feel like she's seeing this guy only because she doesn't think she can do better. He doesn't have a good personality at all, and he doesn't have much of a future, and he's not that considerate of our family. And my parents don't like him much either.
I know, if it were someone else's question I would be saying, "Lay off, it's her life and she's an adult." But she's my sister and I think she can do so much better than this guy.
The problem is how to tell her without making her get defensive about it.
2007-09-23 17:19:08 · 7 answers · asked by Surely Funke 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
She's in her late 20s and there is some pressure to find a man before all the good ones are taken. And some pressure from our parents.
2007-09-23 19:04:55 · update #1
Millions of people go with people who seem wrong for them--it is their choice and no one can really say anything. What do you think she will do when you say something?? She will just stay longer to prove a point. So let her be and she will find out on her own. Otherwise your words won't mean much--it will cause a split that won't heal.
2007-09-23 17:27:30 · answer #1 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, thing is you can't confront her and not have her get defensive. I am having the same problem with my friend, for a different reason though. (not relationships) I have been asking questions about how to confront him. I finally decided that the only way to get past this was to get the confrontation out of the way. Or show her that she can have a much better life than staying with that guy. She doesn't know what else is out there, expand her view of the world. When I confronted my friend about his problem, he was very andry, but I felt so much better knowing that he knew that what he was doing was harming his future. It's so good that you care for you sister like this, you don't see that much these days. I hope I helped Levator_scapulae. ( I love your display name, it sounds like Latin) Anyways, God Bless you and your sister <3
2007-09-24 01:13:20 · answer #2 · answered by Magdalena 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The more you push it, the more she'll want to be with this guy. My sister was the same way and she ended up marrying this jerk, had two kids and finally divorced him after about 5 years.
Here's a very clever and simple way to maybe change her mind without her even realizing it: Ask her for a girls night out (this is even better if you're single - you can say that you really need to get out and she'd be a perfect sidekick). Get her all dolled up and take her somewhere you know will be a ton of guys. Hopefully she'll have guys hitting on her and maybe she'll even meet someone she likes. If she meets a cute, nice guy who gives her attention, maybe she'll see there's a lot more (and better) out there and she'll eventually dump this loser.
2007-09-24 00:48:20 · answer #3 · answered by ivana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can take action.
Get her out of the house and away from the scrub.
See if you can introduce her to some friends.
Get her a gift certificate for a makeover at the Merle Norman place in the mall, then make wolf noises and complement her when she emerges from her appointment.
Take her out to dinner and have a heart-to-heart talk with her, and tell her that she is beautiful and should not settle for scrubs like that.
2007-09-24 00:30:03 · answer #4 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you need to do is relax, take a step back, and worry from a far, you need to let her make her own mistakes, and when it crashes just be there for her, reasure her that she will be fine and make sure to guide her in the right direction!
2007-09-24 00:48:41 · answer #5 · answered by kissaled 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't say how old your sis is. Some girls like men who are "mad, bad and dangerous". One day, she may come to realize that this may not be right for her. If she does, be there for her, otherwise, stay out of it.
2007-09-24 00:32:31 · answer #6 · answered by oldflyer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stay out of it......
2007-09-24 00:34:38 · answer #7 · answered by humboldt1965amy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋