Answering Messages!!!! {Star If You Like Plz}?

3 ⤊

2007-09-23 03:20:13 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles

Roses are red, violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet, and so are you
The roses have wilted, the violets are dead,
The sugar bowl's empty, and so is your head
The roses stink, sorta like sheep
But leave your name, number, and message after the beep
The roses are molding, the violets are rotten
And I might call you back, if I haven't forgotten

We might be in, we might be out, but leave a message and you might find out!
10 hours ago
"Hello? ...Hello? ...Hellooo? I'm sorry, you're gonna have to speak
up, I can't hear you... That's 'cuz I'm not home! Leave a message.
BEEP."

2007-09-23 03:21:34 · update #1

You are dazed, bewildered, trapped in a world with no time, where color collides with sound, and shadows explode. You see a sign up ahead. This is no ordinary answering device; this is "The Twilight Phone"

This call may be recorded or monitored for quality and training purposes. If you don't wish this call to be monitored or recorded, then please let the answering machine know when you leave your message.

Hi. This is John:
If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.
If you are my parents, please send money.
If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money.
If you are my friends, you owe me money.
If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
10 hours ago
A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So leave a message.

Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll be right with you.

BEEP Hello, this is WVKE, you're on the air.

2007-09-23 03:23:03 · update #2

hi you've reached the home of (name) also known as 007 agents if you get this machine we are probably saving the world this tape will self destruct in 5...4...3...2...1... (BEEP)

Hi! Jan's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.

Hi!! You've reached Janet and Chris's room. We're not in right now. If this is our parents, we're at the library studying. Yeah, yeah, that's it, that's the ticket. If this is John, Chris is out with the girls at the party. Yeah, that's it. If this is any one else, we're at a party and you're not. Yeah, a party with the president. Yeah and the... Pope. Yeah that's it.
10 hours ago
Hi, you have reached _(phone number)__ you have a chance to win one million dollars if you can answer the following 1. What is your name? 2. What is your phone number? 3. Why did you call this number?
Prepare for alpha test of Beep Software revision 2.05. Counting down to test:

2007-09-23 03:23:43 · update #3

5...4...3...2...1....

2007-09-23 03:24:17 · update #4

Rub-a-dub-dub, Just got in the tub, Rick is out playing; the kids are misbehaving, and can't come to the phone.

Sorry, Chris and Susan aren't here right now. Please leave your name and number after the tone. If you are calling regarding an outstanding debt, please leave your message BEFORE the tone.
10 hours ago
(Classical music:) This is our answering machine. (Switch to heavy metal racket:) This is our answering machine on drugs. (Silence...) Any message?

(Italian Mafia-style voice:) I can't come to the phone right now. Me and Guido are trying to stuff a body in the trunk. I think we're going to have to size it a little... (Aside:) HEY GUIDO! GET THE CHAINSAW! Anyways, leave your name and a message. If I like it, you'll hear from me. If not, you'll hear from Guido! (Laughter.)

2007-09-23 03:24:52 · update #5

12 answers

lol, funny and worth a star.

2007-09-24 05:31:39 · answer #1 · answered by Widgi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋

Your 18? Then don't just give her the heart & card. She can't always be with her mom. You need catch her at the right time when shes alone. I would ask her out on a date. Since she already said she wants to be your friend first, you have to start slow. Maby you and her could grab a coffee or do something casual. From there if things are meant to be more they will develop, if not, then at least you you were man enough to try. Giving her your phone number would help too. If she is into you, then she will call. Also keep in mind, that you must respect her mother. Don't view her as someone that "might step in it." To a young women family is very important. Showing her mom respect could be a good step, and a key to getting to know her daughter.

2016-04-05 21:32:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋

Lol, I like the Italian Mafia one best.

2007-09-23 03:32:53 · answer #3 · answered by Marmalade 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋

I'm totally speechless! Very funny! Here's your *.

2007-09-23 03:46:51 · answer #4 · answered by Pinyon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋

funny i like the 1st one lol

2007-09-23 03:32:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋

ok tht was a long one but not bad

2007-09-23 03:39:00 · answer #6 · answered by dixi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋

nice funny

2007-09-23 03:24:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋

i gav u a star those wer great

2007-09-23 03:28:26 · answer #8 · answered by blondiieee 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋

good one lol x

2007-09-23 03:24:19 · answer #9 · answered by laydee££$$$$% 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋

hhahahaahhhaaa

2007-09-23 06:51:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋