Am I stupid or backward?

Question

These older and younger women treat me like I am stupid. They say to my face sometimes. I dress nicely but not trashy like they do. They criticise the way I dress. I do not want any attention from men and figure why dress like that in public if I do not want that attention. At home I wear what I like.

They are single moms, some have 7 kids to 2 different dads and they criticise me because I don't have a boyfriend.

In time the right man will come to me but I am smart enough to know that men try and find girlfriends for sex and I only want that when I am married. I am a virgin.

They say I am backwarsd cause I like to listen more than talk in groups, till I get a feel for people and learn they are no threat. Then I speak more.

I have made some big mistakes but do not drink or smoke or take drugs. They say I am no fun.

Am I mixing with the wrong sorts of people?

Where can I find like minded people?

Answer 1

Just do and choose what you like as long as it is benevolent and for the good. Your are going to the direction of improvement of your qualities and will be uniquely identified in the future, there will be a transformation on how people treat you eventually from dislike to some sort of a model. The people who always notice you negatively will surely have less improvement than you can attain because they are more controlled by what other people might say against them, but you, you insist to have a choice, some sort of leadership, discipline and role model. There are already a lot of attractive people, but they are the usual or common. If you succeed to improve yourself more day by day as an attractive personality, then it is most unique and noticeable. First step to take I suggest is be very confident and calibrate yourself for the best, Good Luck!

Answer 2

I don't want to sound mean or anything, but I almost don't believe that your question is sincere. If you truly have these deep beliefs, than why would you even be hanging out with those type of people at all? Maybe you had a religious conversion, and they are your friends from before, but one of the first things they tell you to do when you join a religious group is to drop all of your friends who aren't of that group. In the spirit of open-mindedness, I'm going to answer you as if you are sincere.

1) You will never find a husband if you don't date at all. Yes, some guys are "looking for a girlfriend for sex" but some are just looking for love too. Just make it clear on the first date that you're not that kind of girl and (trust me) those that are just looking for sex will do one of two things. They will either think you're playing hard to get and pursue you more, or they will leave you alone. If they keep pushing you, tell them that even if you were going to give it up, it wouldn't be to them.

2) Dress however you want. At home or out in public, wear what you want. Even if you are wearing a cardboard box, men will still have lust. It's their nature. The good ones try to fight it out of respect for women.

3) Listening is a good quality. Most people will appreciate it...which leads me to my next point.

4) If your so-call "friends" have problems with so many things about you, you should probably find a church group or school group or something and try to make new friends. Being a good listener is something that everyone is looking for in a friend so you shouldn't have any trouble.

Answer 3

Basically you're at a stalemate...You say that THOSE people think your opinions are all wrong, and then you tell why you think their opinions are all wrong.

You're both guilty of exactly the same thing. That’s no big deal though. It’s okay to be different and know people who are different.

Here is my advice. Find someone you respect no matter how ugly, or boring you think they are and make an effort to hang out with them at least once in your life. I totally look up to my close friends. Especially one who lives close to me. She's not perfect, but there are so many qualities about her that I think make her an awesome person and friend. And guess what? I totally thought she was lame in high school. Try looking first for people who you think are nice, level headed, and that you respect....then decide whether you like to hang out with them later because you might be totally shocked to find out you have an awesome time with that person.

Answer 4

You are not backwards, in fact, you are more in control of your life then they are theirs. You do what makes you comfortable. If you're happy without a man in your life right now, more power to ya. It shows independence and that you can take care of yourself. More than likely, they are jealous that you are free to do what you want when you want. You don't have multiple children by multiple men. Don't let them pressure you into anything you don't want to do or that you'll regret. It does seem like you need to get some new friends. Unfortunately, there is no real place that you can go to meet the kinds of people that you want to hang out with. But good luck and hang in there. Do what's right for you and you alone.

Answer 5

You sound like a nice decent girl & they are not your friends & you should not hang around with them, church is a good place for friends or youth groups (not sure if you are the right age for them) or join some nice sports clubs where you will meet people
doing volunteer work is good for you & you may meet some decent people there as well & you will feel good helping people
dont take any notice of those women, they sound trashy to me.
its good you want to wait til marriage & your guy will love you more for that also
you can be proud of yourself keep it up!!

Answer 6

You are too smart for the room. If they can't handle it screw them. I was so much like you. Now I am the one who everyone comes to for money and advice. I was the "odd one"..."she who does not speak"...the "ice-queen"..ect.
A long time ago I took a good hard long look at the folks who were in my life and while some were basically good at heart...they sure made some bad choices. I did not want to follow their example. I am glad I didn't.
They used to call me "Animal" but I have a better life than they do now.
Remember this ok?

Answer 7

No, you are not stupid or backward. You sound mature and steady.

The women who are making fun of you are jealous and resentful. You are where they would like to be.

Find a group that is interested in the things you like. Do you like to knit? Go to the local yarn shop and ask about lessons or groups who come in for help.

Get involved in your church's social activities.

There are many places you can go to find new friends who are just like you. And there are lots of people who believe the way you do.

Answer 8

You are mixing with the wrong kind of people. I'm glad you're a virgin. You can sure tell them this: "I can be like you any time I want, but you can never again be like me". I think that you're are probably the smartest person there. So let them talk their crap.....you'll be the one that laughs in the end. Keep your stance girl, stand up for yourself. I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 9

I really can't say because in some church you may have some sinner there to. Just listen people will talk because they couldn't do the walk. So, don't listen to what they have to say. They are going to hate on you because they couldn't hold it down them self. When it's right you will know it. We all have made mistakes. I wish I would have waited on allot of things. Maybe my head wouldn't be so screw up.

Answer 10

there is nothing wrong with you they are just trying to make them self's feel better about there sluttyness and that you not like them get away before you do some thing you will regret
i have respect for you and i only seen a ? from you you should wait no madder what a guy or any one else will say to you you
your spacial and no one can tell you different !!!!!!
you can do any thing don't let some guy or bad people change that please