My daughter and her boyfriend recently went to the courthouse to be married by the J.P. so that they could "go ahead and live together." Now they are planning a church wedding which is going to be about 2 months since the actual "J.P." wedding. While I respect their reasons for wanting to make it "legal" before living together, I have never heard of re-doing the whole thing (rings, etc) only 2 months later. It seems kind of awkward and not sure what to tell guests. And what day should their anniversaries fall on? Both ceremonies? I realize that these days pretty much anything goes with weddings and I want my daughter to be happy, but has anyone else ever heard of this? Thanks!
2007-09-22 18:00:57 · 7 answers · asked by mysti 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
There are a lot of young women who get married using a JP but still want to have a real wedding. My niece got married with a JP (3 years ago!) and didn't tell any of us, and was planning a wedding for next year. She finally had to come clean, and now plans on having her "wedding" on her 5th anniversary. I've also seen people on here talking about doing both.
As for your daughter - the marriage at the JP is the official wedding, and that date is when they should celebrate their anniversary. The church wedding is really a renewal of vows, since you can only really get married once. There wouldn't be any paperwork for the minister to sign or file, because the JP already did that.
2007-09-22 18:11:10 · answer #1 · answered by Proud to be 59 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
This is actually very common. We perform many of these types of ceremonies for couples who got married in a JP's office, and then some length of time later decide to have a big, more formal wedding, with more guests. They re-do the whole ceremony, and it is as elaborate as they want it to be, and how they celebrate their anniversary is up to them. They are legally married after the first ceremony, so technically, the second ceremony is a vow-renewal, or re-commitment ceremony. There is nothing wrong with celebrating twice! You invite the guests to celebrate the renewing of vows before friends and family. Best wishes!
2007-09-23 11:41:37 · answer #2 · answered by LoveWithNoBoundaries 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My wife and I married nine months before the church wedding. We celebrate our annoversary on the day we were first married. Her family usually sends us an anniversary card based on the date of the church wedding. It is all good and nothing to stress about. Marriage is a merging of values in addition to the formation of a new family and in my opinion should simply be celebrated as a wonderful moment in time. If we have a couple of moments then it is even better as any additional opportunity to remind ourselves of the importance of marriage and honor our spouse is a a good opportunity as opposed to an awkward moment.
2007-09-24 02:51:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
One wedding per couple, please. The "real" wedding WAS the JP event, Instead of re-staging the wedding in church, which seems to me like a parody, they could have a reception to include family and friends in the celebration of their marriage. Then they can have a vow renewal on some future anniversary, the anniversary of their REAL wedding.
2007-09-23 03:08:13 · answer #4 · answered by Ara57 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's really not important to tell nosy guests much beyond they were married a couple months ago but this is their public declaration before family and friends. Their actual anniversary date is the JP date, but they could always celebrate twice.
2007-09-23 00:52:17 · answer #5 · answered by That NC Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate this.......if you want to have a church wedding, then do it once and that's it.
Honestly, the year is 2007.....not many people would look down on an engaged couple living together.
Secondly, I'm assuming they want to be married before living together for moral reasons. However, if you aren't married in front of God (as in a church wedding) you aren't really married in the religious sense, as it is. So, they are married legally and living together. Yet, they are still sinning in a way, b/c they haven't married in front of God. So, they are being really hypocritical.
2007-09-22 18:24:26 · answer #6 · answered by Miss Answers 2007 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Seems like extra money, time and headaches, to accomplish what.... Legally It's already done.
2007-09-26 03:26:15 · answer #7 · answered by Melissa S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋