How to stop a toddler from:?

Question

How do I stop my 22 month old daughter from biting, pinching me, slapping me in the head and she screams very loudly if she get mad. My now 10 yr old boy never did this at his age. Yelp...

NO I DO NOT SPOIL HER AT ALL. AND WHEN I SAY "NO" SHE GIVES ME THE EVIL EYE LOOK. AND NO I HAD NO PREFERENCE FOR A BOY OR GIRL JUST AS LONG AS THEY WERE HEALTHY...SHE WAS A TURNING 40 SUPRISE BUT THIS DOES NOT HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH IT.

Answer 1

If you hit your child back...you only reinforce that it is okay to hit. 22months is a very tenacious and rowdy age! Believe it or not especially for girls! Between 20 months and 3 yrs children are developing their emotions. What is a tiny girl to do with such overwhelming and new scary feelings? Vent them of course! The key in this stage is to teach her to channel her feelings in proper directions. It's okay to be mad....it's what you do with that feeling that matters.

There are several things you can try, to see which works best for your daughter. First, does she seem to slip into her 'angry' behavior more easily when hungry or tired? Try to head her off at the pass with snacks or a rest. Even laying on a little blanket in front of the TV for awhile can make a huge difference, as our brains create the same brainwaves while watching TV as we do in some stages of sleep. Keeping a journal of times when she seems to 'act up' more may provide you some clues. Too much sugar can also cause irritability.

When she does hurt or act verbally abusive you must take action. 22 months is a bit young to try to get her sympathy/empathy. It also teaches her that hitting gives her power over anothers feelings. I would not recommend pretending to cry, that borders on a guilt trip. I would recommend that you leave her. Immediately. No nagging or guilt tripping, just a simple, clear statement that you will not stay and help/play with her when she is being mean. If and when she comes to find you be happy to see her and hug her. You don't want her to feel abandoned or unloved simply for having emotions.

If she is in a place where you can not leave her...say the bathtub, simply stop playing and get her out. As soon as she is dressed, provided she is still upset and you cannot soothe her, leave her again with a simple statement. If you are in public, pick her up and leave.
This is a power struggle, but one parents should approach with caution. Too much interference and punishment and you could break her spirit and/or teach her to stuff her emotions. Too little interference and discipline and she will end up a horrible brat. It is a tightrope to walk. Most importantly remember that your job is to raise a confident responsible adult....not a well behaved child. So what if she screams? As long as you do not give in there is no real issue. She will grow out of it. I promise. How she grows out of it is what matters.

It is so hard, but try to remember during these 'episodes', that you love her and that this is nothing more than a battle of wills and the beginning of her independence. Do not give in, but give all the love you can at the same time. This too shall pass in time. You are not the first mom to go through this, nor the last! Welcome to the terrible two's of girls!

Answer 2

When our 25 month old does, I walk away and say "mommys sad, mommy got hit, mommy doesnt want to play anymore" or do the same if the victim is someone else - give the victim is the attention. He (2 year old) has been getting better, and also can say "sorry" and then gives a hug.

Read this tip, in a Parents magazine, a few months ago, and not sure if it helps, or we just have less agressive kids then others. Plus I think it helps teach that kids wont want to play with you if you're the bully.

Answer 3

Regardless what some others may say you do not reciprocate. Do not hit, pinch, or slap back ever.
For one thing this is simply wrong, and for another thing this is just teaching that it is OK to do these things. Mommy pinched me back therefor it must be OK......
You have to put her in time out each time this happens. Over time she will realize these behaviors get negative results.

Answer 4

Take yourself out of the situation, most toddlers will see this as the ultimate punishment, way more effective then "time outs" or hitting back. Give your child "the look" and then walk away, don't give her the chance to argue the punishment, just make sure her environments safe and move your body to another area of the room or even another room all together, give her a few minutes to realise she doesn't like the situation she put herself in. Be patient, its hard and you may need to do this repeatedly over the course of a month, but it will work.

Answer 5

I am dealing with the same, I have a 2 year old that does the same things to me. Theirs really not much you can do. Just try not to yell. That never works you just gotta say that hurts mommy. Act like your crying, and she should feel sorry. And tell her not to do it again. It kinda works with mine.just make sure you let her know that's wrong and it hurts,and she will eventually learn. Otherwise they pretty much grow out of it by the age 3. Just try to deal with it patiently. Good luck

Answer 6

talk to her seriously and hitting wont hurt im not saying beat the crap out of her but like a liitle slap on the hand or something because if you leave her it only gets worst and worst. i have a little cousin and shes only 5 and shes already bossing my aunt and uncle around! so do something

Answer 7

Tell her "Not nice!" in a very firm voice. Make her sit for 2 minutes. If she gets up put her back. If she won't stay put, sit her on your lap, her back to your chest and hold her with your arms wraped trapping her arms (GENTLY) and kind of rock gently to calm her and talk softly in her ear.

Answer 8

You grab her hands...firmly but not agressively. Look into her eyes and say "NO" firmly. Do it every single time!

Answer 9

I think that you are spoiling your daughter unconsciously. Did you secretly wanna have a daughter the first time you got pregnant? Do you think of your daughter as your little princess and being too compliant?

That might be why she feels like she can go overboard. She knows there won't be punishment or boudaries for her.

Answer 10

im not sure how to handle all the other stuff, but the only cure i've ever known and heard about for biting is to bite back, its to let her know how it feels, and usually it only takes once to get her attention.