If someone loves someone else and is willing to wait for them.. WHY THE HELL WOULD THEY SLEEP WITH OTHER WOMEN?! oh yea.. it was defintely the lonliness in his defense, no? okay, so.. your all probably wondering why he is or was suppose to wait for me, but i wont get into details really.. and yes i am beyond the age of consent lol.. so its not that.. I'm now stuck in a position where I don't know if I should just proceed with waiting for each other. We have to wait for another 9 months, and he said that he does and did love me. I know this is silly. I know that he's probably saying this to not lose me. Can any of you relate to HIM? I feel like i'm his, "future girl"..the girl he's investing in...The things he did were over 8 months ago, but we've known each other for about 3 years now. I would greatly appreciate for anyone to just emphasize, encourage and give me advice on what I should do. I do love him dearly and I strongly do believe he lovs me as well.
2007-09-22 14:08:19 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Again, I'm sorry for not being too informative. Please bear with me here.
2007-09-22 14:08:55 · update #1
Again, I'm sorry for not being too informative. Please bear with me here.
2007-09-25 10:03:17 · update #2
he didn't wait because he wanted instant gratification, means he is immature, has no discipline, and no self control. his character speaks for itself basing it on his choices, and what he persues are his desires and whenever he doesn't get what he wants when he wants it is he going to go out and sleep around?
2007-09-22 14:31:39 · answer #1 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One major point not everyone will tell you is: You two shouldn't be committed to each other with the express intent of settling down after this time period. What I mean to say is that if you are meant to be together, then you will always have the option of getting together so long as neither of you is married. If one of you decides to get married to somebody else with the knowledge that the other of you is still available then the decision will have been made that you or he weren't Mr/Miss Right afterall. He obviously needs his freedom in the meantime, and that doesn't preclude his ability to marry you eventually. It just helps to ensure that he's actually ready when the time comes, and secondly that he's more sure that you are Miss Right afterall. If you two are concerned that the relationship will become history if you are separated, and remain committed due to insecurity, then you're more likely to fail as a couple eventually than if you approach this union as a future possibility and remain open to other possibilities.
2007-09-22 21:21:59 · answer #2 · answered by oogabooga37 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1) Guys brains and hearts are poorly connected. It is possible that he did this remarkably stupid thing and still loves you.
2) This is a remarkably stupid thing he did. Guys do some amazingly stupid things, often for the sake of their penis.
3) There are all kinds of diseases going around. Dont you be intimate with him until he gets himself certified by a lab that he doesnt have one of the million diseases going around.
4) He didnt have to tell you about it. That he told you is an act of good faith. If he wanted her instead of you, he can go chase her - but he isnt. It sounds like he is pursuing you. That tells you where his priorities are.
5) How are you ever going to trust him again? Ask him that question. Ask him how you can ever trust him not to have another affair. Let him think long an hard about it. If he doesnt have something sincere, insightful, and relevant, then maybe you cant trust him in that way.
6) You sound young. It might be a really good idea to wait until you are over 24 and the guys you are dating are over 24 before getting married. Guys brains dont fully form until around that age... puberty, hormones, and biology arent done until around then.
2007-09-22 21:19:42 · answer #3 · answered by Curly 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Turn this around for a moment. What would he have to say if you went and had a one night stand with another guy because you were lonely????? Bet you would be broken up, right?
If he does not love you and respect you enough to keep it in his pants now, he will not do so in the future. You will be listening to the I'm lonely story over and over.
He cheated, you either kick him to the curb and wait for a real man that has respect for you, or you put up with the baloney.
Your choice, your heart, your body and your relationship.
2007-09-22 21:38:14 · answer #4 · answered by Sue F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How can you expect him to wait that long if you are the future girl? If you aren't engaged, or engaged to be engaged, married etc. He is a free agent. What he does now before you are a"couple" is his own business, and you really have no right to expect him to not find company. Sorry, probably not the answer you're looking for
2007-09-22 21:18:45 · answer #5 · answered by Lisa W 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Be careful not to become his "plan B" girl, which it sounds like you have already become.
If that is true, do not despair! You are a beautiful woman and well worth waiting for. Just keep waiting for Mr. Right. He will find you through fate.
2007-09-22 21:20:22 · answer #6 · answered by box of rain 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You weren't that important to him, he cheated on you. A man will tell you anything to get out of the dog house. When you do give it to him he will come up with more excuses.
2007-09-22 21:20:02 · answer #7 · answered by moonchild 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it would help to know why you all have to wait. but here is the thing... he is a scum bag.. and you should leave him for someone who means what they actually say. i ve been with someone for a year before i had to leave the country for 7 months, i am now married to that man, and he was faithful to me all that time and we even got engaged while i was gone. so he is a badddd guy and he did it coz he doesnt want to invest this much in you. move on.
2007-09-22 21:14:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anna 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
This man does not love you. He thinks of himself more than he thinks of you. He does not value the gift that you would give him......your virginity. Find someone who values you more. The question you need to ask yourself is 'why do you love someone who treats you so poorly'
2007-09-22 21:17:41 · answer #9 · answered by tlbrown42000 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It isn't loneliness at all. It's called "sexual urges" in a man. We men can separate love and sex much more so than women can. If he isn't getting it from you it doesn't mean that he doesn't need it from someone else.
2007-09-22 21:16:16 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋