Things you don't want to hear during surgery:
Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness."
Bo! Bo! Come back with that. Bad dog!
Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?
Hand me that... uh... that uh... that thingy there.
Oh no! Where's my Rolex.
Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived from 500 ml of this stuff before?
There go the lights again?
"Ya know, there's big money in kidneys? and this guy's got two of 'em."
Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing off my concentration.
What's this doing here?
I hate it when they're missing stuff in here.
That's cool. Now can you make his leg twitch by pressing that one?!
Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
Sterile schmerile. The floor's clean, right?
OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
Nurse, did this patient sign an organ donation card?
Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
What do you mean "You want a divorce?!?"
FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!
Oh no! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
2007-09-22 09:50:17 · 21 answers · asked by pheonix140180 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
You forgot, "Okay everyone, lets just get this done any which way NOW...I have a tee off time in 15 minutes."
2007-09-22 09:59:43 · answer #1 · answered by ♥STREAKER♥©℗† 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Great list !!
1.Is this the brain I took out or the one that needs to be put in ?
2.I'm staying at a Holiday Inn.
2007-09-22 17:33:33 · answer #2 · answered by The Uncanny Comic 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some very good ones here
2007-09-22 17:19:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, this is pretty good. I worked in surgery though, and it's not as funny or as scary as the real stuff you hear. peace
2007-09-22 16:56:10 · answer #4 · answered by Pilgrim Traveler 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
nice ones best one i heard was this week
a man in the mortuary woke up during his autopsy
the pain of the knife cutting his face woke him up
THIS IS TRUE TOO
in this weeks paper
2007-09-23 11:12:08 · answer #5 · answered by itsa o 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thank goodness, I've already had my appendix out! Good joke though. LOL
2007-09-22 17:44:46 · answer #6 · answered by Kitty Katty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, they say you learn the most from your mistakes.
I have the shakes from drinking too much coffee.
Throw me that scalpel. . . I'll catch it.
2007-09-22 16:59:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Too funny lol
2013-12-03 09:22:23 · answer #8 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very nice, one more suggestion:
Allah Akbar!
2007-09-22 17:12:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quite funny . But there's one flaw in you question and that is. You would be out cold, so you wouldn't hear anything.
2007-09-22 17:05:14 · answer #10 · answered by spanner 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋