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Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex.

Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me.
When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license, I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex.
He said, "I would like to have one too!" Then I said, "But she is a dog!" He said he didn't care what she looked like.
I said, "You don't understand... I have had Sex since I was nine years old." He replied,
"You must have been quite a strong boy."

When I decided to get married, I told the minister that I would like to have Sex at the wedding. He told me to wait until after the wedding was over.
I said, "But Sex has played a big part in my life and my whole world revolves around Sex."
He said he didn't want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in his church. I told him everyone would enjoy having Sex at the wedding.
The next day we
were married at the Justice of the Peace.
My family is barred from the church from then on.

When my wife and I went on our honeymoon, I took the dog with me.
When we checked into the motel, I told the clerk that I wanted a room for me and my wife and a special room for Sex.
He said that every room in the motel is a place for sex. I said, "You don't understand. ... Sex keeps me awake at
night."
The clerk said, "Me too!"

One day I entered Sex in a contest. But before the competition began, the dog ran away.
Another contestant asked me why I was just looking around.
I told him that I was going to have Sex in the contest. He said that I should have sold my own tickets. "You don't understand," I said, "I hoped to have Sex on TV."
He called me a show off.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married but Sex left me after I was married." The Judge said, "Me too!"

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking all over for her.
A cop came over and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in the morning.
I said, "I'm looking for Sex." - My case comes up next Thursday.

Well now I've been thrown in jail, been divorced and had more damn troubles with that dog than I ever foresaw.
Why just the other day when I went for my first session with the psychiatrist, she asked me, "What seems to be the trouble?"
I replied, "Sex has been my best friend all my life but now it has left me for ever. I couldn't live any longer so lonely." and the doctor said, "Look mister, you should understand that sex isn't a man's best friend so get yourself a dog."

2007-09-22 03:37:46 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music Jokes & Riddles

16 answers

lol! this is so funny

2007-09-22 04:01:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Freakin A! That's hilarious!

2007-09-22 06:20:09 · answer #2 · answered by Andrea H 7 · 0 0

I like

2007-09-22 06:11:31 · answer #3 · answered by nick k 3 · 0 0

I've got this joke or whatever one wants to call it ,written on a scroll.It's good isn't it?.
Thanks for posting.

2007-09-22 04:22:27 · answer #4 · answered by xyz 7 · 0 0

I have heard that one a couple times. My boyfriends dad liked it so well he sent him a copy.

2007-09-22 03:50:11 · answer #5 · answered by Angel Unaware 7 · 0 0

Those jokes are funny. Did you make it up, never heard them before.

2007-09-22 03:47:35 · answer #6 · answered by ilovenickjonas1341 1 · 1 2

lol nice joke

2007-09-22 05:06:24 · answer #7 · answered by mohawk 2 · 0 0

:L that was gud i like that joke im going 2 tell me friends about it :L

2007-09-22 03:49:21 · answer #8 · answered by Tee-Tee 2 · 1 2

i just love double sounding words/ expressions.
they make other think of something else......
i do that. though i don't go that far by naming my dog Sex.
it's funny. hilarious.
hehehehehe.......

2007-09-22 03:49:12 · answer #9 · answered by periwinkle_sam05 2 · 1 2

gahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahbbxsyxvvsusvxu@2jd****hsbbwk sory hairbol

2007-09-22 03:49:52 · answer #10 · answered by Lasagna delivery guy 5 · 1 0

haha cute

2007-09-22 03:45:14 · answer #11 · answered by alex 2 · 1 2

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