Yesterday my Dr. called and said I had a positive test for Chlamydia. I have been with my new BF for 5 mos. I was tested for STD/HIV before we had sex and everything was fine.
When I went into the Dr. yesterday she gave me some antibiotics and said everything would be fine. Problem is I haven't told my BF yet. I invited him to come have lunch with me since we work in the same Office Plaza . I plan on telling him when he comes. I really have no clue as to how to start the conversation. I don't want to blame him for anything but I also want him to know HE gave it to me and i am extremely upset that he didn't know his "status" before he started sleeping with me. How should I start the conversation? Should I tell him before, after or while we are eating? Should I keep it short and sweet or should I tell him that He gave it to me and how disgusting it is that he doesn't get STD checks in between sex partners. I don't have a clue as to how to deal with this and what to say/not say. HELP!!
2007-09-14 05:15:00 · 7 answers · asked by Tia 1 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ STDs
Clearly you need to have a frank conversation with your boyfriend. But be open and honest, and concerned more than angry. An accusatory, fearful approach usually doesn't work very well as a starting point. There may be an innocent explanation for all this, so start out giving him the benefit of the doubt. At the same time, if he is infected and infected you, both of you need to know and deal with it.
2007-09-14 05:28:44 · answer #1 · answered by caligirl_SC 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First off, chlamydia does not always cause symptoms in men - the first poster should not have suggested this means your partner has cheated.......simply not true. Second, I'm not sure how you can be angry with your partner for having transmitted this to you. It's great that you were tested before starting a new sexual relationship but to assume he had was just as careless on your part as it was his. Neither one of you intentionally set out to contract or spread this STD but unforunately it happened. Just have a straight forward talk with him and explain the situation and that you both need to be treated and abstain from sex until your treatment is complete and you have been retested to confirm it has been cured.
2007-09-14 05:55:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, unless you were a virgin before him you can't be sure he gave it to you, so don't go throwing accusations around, because women don't always have symptoms and you could've had it before you were with him, but since you're mad at him I'm assuming you got tested between partners. That said, it was irresponsible of him to start sleeping with a new partner (you) without getting tested first. I know you're mad, but if you like him, you need to handle this maturely if you want to keep him and don't make it an angry discussion. Lesson learned, what's done is done, and at least what you have is curable.
Edited to add: It is VEEEEEEEEERY possible for a man to have it and show NO symptoms so at least he probably didn't knowingly give it to you.
2007-09-14 05:23:30 · answer #3 · answered by hello 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you should tell him about your results from the doctor with out yelling or pointing fingers. You should also tell him that YOUR sexual health was good BEFORE you started being intimate with this guy. Just start the conversation by telling him that you had a doctors visit and what you found out during the doctor visit.
Make sure that he gets treated for this too as you can pass it back and forth between yourselves.
2007-09-14 05:26:18 · answer #4 · answered by nanaimosummer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok, first off, if you were tested before u got together, its probable that he hasant been total honest to you.
now it also takes up to 6 mos, to determine any kind of STD. so maybe u caught it with some one else. dont forget to have him tested.
good luck.
2007-09-14 06:15:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
honey, he's been sleeping around, Chlamydia causes a very uncomfortable time for guys that get it, and they get it treated soon after contracting it. If he doesn't know he has chlamydia, it's because he caught it recently. You may want to reconsider having anything more to do with this guy.
2007-09-14 05:22:17 · answer #6 · answered by essentiallysolo 7 · 2⤊ 3⤋
tell it after! say it in a calm way,im pretty sure youre a lil mad but dont yell at him
2007-09-16 08:32:11 · answer #7 · answered by malibu barbie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋