Lady #1--My husband took our neighbor's garbage up to the street to be nice, and when he got home from work, she had taken HER garbage can back to the alley where the garbage cans live, but left ours by the street. I thought this was rude. And before anyone asks, she's perfectly healthy, it wouldn't have been physically difficult for her to take ours also, and we live in an extremely safe town, so it wouldn't be dangerous for her to stay out there longer or anything. Even if she had her hands full, the alley is only like ten feet from the street and ten feet from the house, she could have put down whatever she had in her hand, and gone back for the second can.
Lady#2--I don't know my husband's ex fiance who is his daughter's mother, but I sent her an email when I heard about the Mattel lead paint toy recall, and it was nice and friendly, and I made a point to be like, "just in case you weren't near a TV to hear the news" and she didn't write me back
Aren't they both being rude???
2007-09-08 14:50:48 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Just to remind you, I DIDN'T take the ladies garbage can up, my HUSBAND did, which I thought was very sweet, and he WASN'T expecting anything in return, I am upset at her lack of consideration on HIS behalf! Some of you folks need to calm down.
2007-09-08 15:57:43 · update #1
Lady #1 was inconsiderate (maybe not rude). She should have returned the favor.
Lady #2 may have been busy then forgot about the email, or maybe it was delivered to her spam. I used to get ticked when people didn't reply back to my emails, even just to acknowledge them. But unless you know for sure if they're blowing you off, give them the benefit of the doubt.
2007-09-08 15:22:46 · answer #1 · answered by Opal 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No they weren't being rude at all. In fact, that you should worry so much about it says something about you.
Lady #1 was probably thinking: "well, that was nice of him (them)"; but rightly so did not want to start a neighborly garbage niceness thing with a guy who obviously has an attachment, therefore she was being smart. OR, she really just didn't feel like taking your can back. Just because your hubby did it for her doesn't automatically mean quid pro quo and if it did, it would take all the niceness out of it to begin with. OR she maybe thought you guys were telling her that her garbage was too full, too stinky, etc. It could have been any one of a hundred reasons, none of which make her a B**ch.
Lady number two probably thought you were insincerely sticking your nose where it doesn't belong.
2007-09-08 15:20:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I struggle with the same thing you do I do nice things for people and get my feelings hurt when they are not acknowledged the way I feel they should have been either by a simple thank you or a nice gesture in return. So what I ended up having to do was do nice things and not expect anything in return....that way if they just ignored my kind gesture I was not hurt because I was not expecting anything and when someone did something nice I was always surprised and pleased. Honestly I have found that doing it this way enable me to do more for people and have less resentment in my life..Good Luck
2007-09-09 05:46:07 · answer #3 · answered by Petra 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you do something for your neighbor then it should be to be nice, not to have her put down her things, or whatever, to take you cans up for you. You even said it wasn't that far, so why's it a problem for you to do it?
As for the mother, maybe she received ten e-mails like yours and did not have a chance to respond to everyone because she thought they were just being nice, not looking for a pat on the back.
2007-09-08 15:09:01 · answer #4 · answered by Hallie 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, I don't think so. Maybe she didn't know you were the person who took her garbage cans. Maybe she did know but it never occurred to her to take yours. Maybe she thought you did it to be nice and not for something in return. Maybe her mother didn't check the e-mail, maybe she had nothing to respond with and maybe she was offended because the message makes it seem like she's a bad mother who wasn't aware of the recall and needed you to remind her.
2007-09-08 14:59:52 · answer #5 · answered by Luv2Answer 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
The first lady - It probably never occurred to her to move your trash cans for you.
The second - Your ex's fiance may not be comfortable with the idea of exchanging e-mails with his new wife!!!! Not all women can be friendly with the "new woman". OR It could just be the she blocks all e-mails not from people in her address book, or that it got sent to the spam folder and automatically deleted.
2007-09-08 15:30:03 · answer #6 · answered by startwinkle05 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
#1 is not being rude. You shouldn't expect a kindness in return for your husband's. It would be nice if she thanked you, but she may not even know who took her trash.
#2 not rude. People get a ton of emails and sometimes forget to respond to them.
2007-09-08 16:41:48 · answer #7 · answered by SHSHSH 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't consider it rude, just absent mindedness. Continue to do good works despite others reactions towards your good intentions. Be happy in knowing you did something kind out of your own heart and if the ex-fiance doesn't respond, at least you sent her the information.
2007-09-08 16:47:47 · answer #8 · answered by Lov'n IT! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that we should learn to do nice things for others without expecting something in return.
I think it would have been nice if they had thought to return the kindness shown them, but I don't think you should expect it just because you did something for them.
There is a lot of joy to be found in just being kind with no expectations.
2007-09-08 15:02:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I promise you one thing--The world DOES NOT and NEVER WILL revolve around YOU!!!
No one is obligated to take out your garbage for you or take your advice and spend their time answering your helpful suggestions e-mail.
People are busy and they're not busy-bodies--they don't even give a second thought about you unless it is to avoid you when they see you coming.
2007-09-08 15:19:13 · answer #10 · answered by steinbeck11 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋