i have a situation w/ my boyfriend whom i have a 8 month old daughter with, see i told him when i first got w/ him 2 years ago that i dont want to be w/ him if he did any type of drugs at all and he told me he would never do any at all as long as we are together, well everysince we moved around his mom shes done nothing but get him high behind my back, i dont see how a mom can sit there and do that w/ her son anyway, but ive told him over and over im gonna leave him if he keeps doing it and he just keeps doing it behind my back anyway, hell tell me hes not but then i find out hes still doing it. then he will make up some stupid excuse. i really have no place to go if i leave him b/c im taking cosmetology classes so i have to stay around here. anyone have any advice besides telling me to leave him?
2007-08-22 15:53:02 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Liz,
When I was a young Joe I smoked - for many years - pretty much daily. i only stopped because I promised my Dad I would. He was going to wipe me. I haven't touched it since.
Now i was ready for the change anyway - I was tired of my lifestyle and wanted to move on but if it had not been for the promise to dad I know I wouldn't have been able to do it.
I am opposed to emotional blackmail but you have a right to choose whether you want a partner who smokes dope, and if you don't you should tell him.
Talk it out but the bottom line is you need to be prepared to leave - and if he promises and cheats again - you gotta go.
If you're not prepared to actually leave then I don't know what you can do. It may not be physically adictive but boy is it hard to stop!!!
Sorry
Joe
2007-08-22 16:21:19 · answer #1 · answered by Joe 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is he the father of your child? Is this a long term relationship? Answers to those questions would certainly need to be taken into consideration. Marijuana IS addictive. It is full of harmful chemicals. It is FAR worse than smoking tobacco. Stoners will tell you it is harmless. They will also tell you it is not addictive. While it is true that it is not physically addictive, it IS psychologically addictive. I have known people who have tried to kick it for years. I have known others who can just walk away. I have no idea which your boyfriend is? The more important question here is; what can you do, and what will you do? You are as free as you think you are. You don't sound like you feel very free. I suggest working on that first. You have power. You are a bright young woman. You can make decisions and stick to them. You CAN make your way in this world. There is help available. Staying with a boyfriend JUST because you need a place to live is NEVER a good idea. Since you have a child to think about also, it is a terrible idea. Since his mother is getting high with him, I think you are fighting a losing battle. It will be next to impossible to get him to want to quit. And, if he doesn't want to quit, he won't quit. Good luck. Do what you know to be right and everything will be alright.
2007-08-22 23:10:36 · answer #2 · answered by YahooGuru2u 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
addiction is a big problem especially if the mom is consenting his actions, i say finish your studies then save if you have enough money leave him. because obviously he will not change till he is with his parents maybe there is hope if you are alone together he might change for the better. soory that you have to be the man of the house he has to contribute or else live on your own.
2007-08-23 10:08:03 · answer #3 · answered by bellatq 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you dont have a job you have to get one and save money and not to be stupid but you could get assistance and definately leave swallow your pride and get you and your kid out of that situation nobody in there right mind would stay i know you can get help and leave but the ? is do you really want to leave because if you did you would go sorry if that is harsh but when a kid is involved you do what you have to do and you dont make excuses.................
2007-08-22 23:06:06 · answer #4 · answered by dragonfly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sure finish the classes and be nice and when it is done get a job and move out. i know the pot isn't good and you will start having halinations and stuff its bad and sometimes you can't stop which shes probably got him hooked on it sad though i have known paretns to do this.
2007-08-26 20:21:40 · answer #5 · answered by Tsunami 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋