Why can't adults cope with the loss of someone as well as children can?

Question

A little girl wrote this about her mum, which was very moving


Prayer

Dear Jesus

I heard daddy crying
He did not know
I was there

But I was
He was kneeling down
Like I am now
I heard him talking
To you

He asked you
If you could give him
Another chance

I think he wants you
To bring back
My Mummy

But I am not sure
If you heard him
Because
He was crying

That is why
I am at this grave
To pray as well
And see if she does
Come back

If you cannot
Hear me
I will wipe my eyes
Blow my nose
And speak clearly

And cry tomorrow
Instead

Answer 1

Lee: Children often think about things more simply than adults do. Death particularly.

Chris: They have not yet learn to fear it yet. Many of our fears and insecurities are learned by the people around us (and for good reason- for example, the fear of heights. A child doesn't fear being thrown into the air by their grandpa... they don't fear it until they see their mother have a heart attack for fear of them falling and breaking their neck)

Answer 2

"And cry tommorrow instead" So her grief is not over, Nor is her hope of wishful thinking, Grief has no time limit no matter
what age a person. It is a very heart touching poem, and so
wonerful she used writing as a coping tool to vent and feel some relief in her grief of longing. Some children go through
anger at loss, so do some adults it is part of the grief process
no matter the age, has been my experience. Blessings

Answer 3

That is so moving and yet so heartbreaking.

I think it is the bliss of ignorance - children accept what you tell them and move on because they are not tangled in the web of life. Children are honest , practical, live for today and are more concerned about the people that they can see are upset and want to make it right for them. Their love is pure and untainted .

When my mom passed my niece was thrilled that she had gone to heaven and was so lucky to be up there and able to look down and see all of us all time. She said " Granny is so lucky , when I go to nursery and want to be with you all I can't cause you are working. Granny can see us anytime she likes - don't worry I will make you happy again"

Answer 4

Because this one child seems to have a mature attitude about the loss of her mother does not mean all children handle death better than adults. A lot of children don't really understand the whole concept of death for a long time, so you can't grieve about something you don't understand. And some adults handle grief better than others.

Answer 5

Thats very touching, I think children have a different reality to adults, when you are young anything is possible, when someone dies they dont realise the harsh reality that faces them and the prospect of never seeing someone again. Children have an innocence that is wonderful, they are able to see things in a different light to adults, they arent given half as much credit as they deserve.

Answer 6

That's very moving! It's a great shame that there is no such thing as god, and Jesus is long dead and as much able to help as the childs mother, or any other dead person! We should cease to foster in children the belief in non-existant gods. Death is a part of life. The end of life! Oblivion! We should be ready by now to face tht fact.

Answer 7

I don't believe that children cope well with the loss of someone. It might appear that way but the effects of grief come out at some time.

Answer 8

Children are closer to God because they haven't been on earth as long as adults have. I thing they have more of a realization that we are spiritual beings having a human experience and not human beings having a spiritual experience.

Blessed Be

Answer 9

wow thats a moving poem.
Children don't understand death the same way we do. They don't recognize what that means until they grow up and notice that daddy, mummy or grandpa is not and will not be there anymore for them and it's gone forever...I wish we'd cope that way for our entire lifes...since that way we wouldnt probably suffer that much with losses.

Answer 10

Because the adults understand the permanence of the loss and all the ramifications of dealing without that person forever.