How does a person EARN respect?

Question

I thought that treating people nice would get you respect, but apparently not. I see a lot of rude people who get respect, but I'm polite & don't get it. I do give it, though.

Answer 1

"Being polite" is important, but it's not exactly the same as giving respect.

A few tips: (which you may already do, but anyway) --

Give thanks, aloud and silently, at every opportunity for the things people do for you and for the gifts that meet you every day.

Acknowledge your strengths.

Always keep your word. Do what you say you will do. Don't try to impress people, just keep it real. This includes chores, dates, representing yourself, or goals you set yourself. People will come to know you are true to your word.

Avoid negative speech and attitude. Never gossip. You don't have to be tricky or snide about it. When others do it don't join in, and if they try to get you to, change the subject.

Learn to let things roll off and not take things personally. Whenever you are tempted to feel insulted ask yourself what the odds are that the party was really even thinking about you at all, or just in the middle of their day --- and have some tolerance for the fact that every once in a while we are all dorks. Be compassionate and have a soft side when others go off, and you will cease to be in their sights when they look for someone to bounce against.

Don't be overbearing about it, but see where your presence can be beneficial. Don't ask if you can help out without having a certain suggestion in mind, or wait to be asked; if you see that something needs to be taken care of, do your part to take care of it. People will deeply respect your sense of involvement and engagement. If it occurs to you to do something nice for someone, follow through! Lots of people talk about how nice it would be to do this or that but rarely follow through. People like to feel valued.

Ask people for advice or help in the right way. Not to flatter, but with sincerity. If you have a question about how to do something or where to find something, ask yourself who you know that might know the answer and go talk to them. People need to feel they are being of value and it is important to give them a chance to contribute.

Laugh as much as you can, as long as it's authentic. Sometimes we take ourselves too seriously. I speak from personal experience here.

Be yourself instead of trying to fit in to a group based in what they think is good. You will draw toward you people who are in sympathy with what you value and you will build each other up.

Just always hold to your highest possible standard of personal integrity in all things. Don't compromise this, ever.

Bless yourself every day and cultivate your own sense of joy. In sending out all this good ol' stuff every day, it has to start by giving yourself a little love first. When you wake wish yourself peace, wisdom, safety, love, happiness, friendship, health, or whatever else is important to you. Then, when you see friends, silently wish them the same. Even do this for a total stranger sitting in class or in traffic and you will be surprised at what happens.

You asked an excellent question. I hope everything goes really well for you.

By the way, a little secret -- bullies and rude people aren't getting respect -- they are getting tolerance from everyone else's better nature, because people know it's easier to give someone what they want than listening to them whine about it and make everyone else miserable, but for sure they are breeding ill will. People like this are never happy because they are never satisfied with what they have and only concentrate on what they aren't getting --- and while they get what they want in the moment, they never do earn true respect; they just run through people and places.

Don't worry about other people; just concentrate on your own integrity and make sure you are being your best self. Even if no one praises you, you are being in a worthy way and that must be what satisfies you in enriching your spirit. It is quiet and slow-revealing, but in time people will learn to value it.

If you are very young, people are often more impressed by appearances and attitude than by a good and true nature. Hang in there and don't get despondent. Just bless yourself and yours.

:-) Good Luck

Answer 2

You're partially right about earning respect. But it goes much deeper than being nice.

Getting respect from other people is also determined by how much you will let them get away with. With most people out there, it isn't enough to just be nice and then hope they respect you. There are people out there who think that nice people are weak and that they can be walked all over. With those people, all the respect, politeness and kindness won't win them over.

In many cases, if you want respect, you have to demand it and not leave yourself open for anything less. If someone shows a complete lack of regard for you, you must be willing to stand up for yourself by setting down boundaries and be willing to enforce them if they are breached. People may dislike you for it, but those are usually people who wouldn't like you for being nice, so it really doesn't matter. You must demand respect for yourself because if you don't, there's no one who can do it for you. Don't let the bullies win.

Answer 3

Keep your Head up high and act like you are a Star. Body-Language is very important, stand straight, look People in their eyes.

Respect is something earned. Being Respectful helps.

Rude people don't get respect, they are getting ignored through niceness. Because others who do not want to be treated rudely they just ignore them by being nice.

Answer 4

i dont think they really get respect, in my experience, i think its more of a fear than anything.
theres also other people who are just the type to give their respect to everyone they know, no matter if they deserve it or not.
another thing to consider is that you dont compleately know those rude people. maybe they have a reason to be rude and some people know about it, thats how they get the respect.

in the end tho, you shouldnt worry how they get their respect, but how you do. your polite, and respect others, and those who notice and apreciate that, respect you too. the question you have to ask yourself is, does everyone else really deserve your second thought about this?

Answer 5

You earn respect by behaving respectably--even in the face of rude treatment from others. Do you really care about having the respect of obnoxious people, anyway?

Answer 6

You earn respect by respecting people, knowledge and wisdom. Those rudes you talking about are not respected but feared!

Answer 7

Unfortunately, I have seen this happen as well. Not all churches are like this though. I am familiar with the concept of "buying your way to heaven" Thing is, that don't work. Only through the grace of God, not through works.... When I go to church, I try to pay no attention to people when they are acting rude in any way. I went to see god. It doesn't really matter what they think.

Answer 8

Would you want respect from people who don't give respect to nice people though. I think you should be more choosy about who you want that respect from.

Answer 9

You earn respect by respecting yourself.
You only get out of life what you give in,
give yourself respect first and respect will come to you.

Answer 10

What do you call "nice?" Try not to be a pushover or a doormat. Be polite, but not too sugary sweet. Decide what you will and won't tolerate, and then abide by your decision. People will be less inclined to be rude to you once they see that you won't tolerate their nonsense.