My 20 mos old keeps screaming and crying HELP?

Question

My son is getting over a small cold and has some molars coming in, the doctor says. (went to the doctor last week) He has no fever, sometimes he eats everything and other times nothing, but the past few days he is just really cranky, screaming, and crying for no particular reason. We have tried to pick him up, ignore him, read books, playing with toys, sometimes it works. He is also giving us a hard time taking his naps now, then he becomes so tired in the late afternoon. Any help is appreciated. This is my 2nd child and I did not experience this with my first one. It seems no matter want we do it just a temp fix. Isn't this early for the so called terrible 2's?

Answer 1

It sounds like a case of teething rather then discipline issues. I suggest Motrin, teething rings, and teething tablets. Then see how he responds.

Answer 2

It isnt the terrible twos, you already said he's teething. Molars hurt like holy hell fires. What do you want him to do? sing a song and do a jig? The kids in pain.

The terrible twos arent terrible, its just the time when toddlers begin to try new ways of expressing their wants and desires. Its the time when you start training them how they may or may not behave. There only as terrible as you let them be. (raised two brothers and been in child care for 14 years. been through two and three many MANY times over.)

On top of that, being almost two means he's all the more aware of his world, and his place in it, it makes him want to fight sleep. Its normal also. just keep him on the same schedule, even if it means rocking him, or sticking him in the car and driving around town. His body will eventually fight and win to keep that schedule.

If he's teething and over tired he's going to act exactly like you're describing.

I would give him some tylenol when he's the most uncomfortable, or maybe just before his nap, so he can sleep without pain. And shut the house down every day at the same time for nap time. Turn of the lights, shut of the tv, have your other child read quietly, or go out and play in the yard. Anything thats going to stimulate him you wnat to cut out at nap time. It'll take time but he will get back on a schedule.

Dont try forty different things, stick with the same things over and over. He cries, you comfort him, divert him, finally ignore him if he needs to just go entertain himself. Do the same thing over and over. A lot of it is how you react to it. If you react with a huff and a panic, he'll be all the more worked up. If you take it in stride he'll eventually find a new way to express himself.

A tired 20 month old who's in pain cannot be reasoned with. A 20 month old who's well rested and not in pain can be. Pick your battles and let routine fill in the space where he cannot be reasoned with.

Answer 3

No it's not too early for the terrible two's. It sounds like he is just having a hard time with the teeth and the cold combo. Try to stay calm & as soothing as you can. You'll be through this soon. Hang in there.

Answer 4

it's probably just a stage he is going thru and with molars coming in just imagine how painful that is...poor honey.. before nap time try giving him a nice warm bath, shut off all tv's radio, phones ect..and just lay w/him and talk or sing softly to him while cuddling. If everything around him is calm and quiet it just might be the trick to getting him to take his nap and you that much needed break. The world can wait ...

Answer 5

Sounds like your little fella is under the weather- did your doctor check his ears for an ear infection- that would be enough to make anybody cranky! Poor mama! You must be exhausted- try to get some time for yourself away from baby- every mom needs some respite

Answer 6

The second child seems to pick on thing quicker cause hey do have silbling to watch and copy my youngest son did alot of things sooner than the first one. I don't think its anything to worry about I'm sure it is the terrible 2's kicking in already.

Answer 7

Angelina - with both of my kids, the "terrible 2's" started at around 18 months of age.
The basic issue is always the same: the kid wants to communicate with you, wants to tell you something. But s/he doesn't have the words, or the gestures to tell you what they really want to tell you. Realizing this, they are frustrated and get into a rage.

In your case, your son wants to communicate the pain he is feeling, but he doesn't know how to tell you. We taught both of our daughter the ASL (sign language) sign for "pain" very early on, and that came in pretty helpful. Since your son can already verbalize easy words, I'd recommend to teach him that word.

Crying "Help" is fairly common in this situation: they believe you will be able to figure out what they want, if only you devote enough attention to them. So ... they try to get your attention at any cost. Crying help, rocking around in their high chair, throwing food, grabbing and tossing their diapers, turning sippy cups and plates into projectiles, really anything.

There is no panacea on how to deal with that situation. But the following helped often (not always, mind you) for us:
* do what you can to alleviate the pain; however, that's not the root cause. The root cause for the behavior is his frustration for not making himself understood
* never raise your voice; your job is to de-escalate the situation. Under no circumstances get into a crying or yelling match with the toddler
* speak to your toddler in as calm and as low a voice as possible; if the toddler doesn't stop, speak with less volume; if necessary, whisper. He will want to hear what you're saying, and realize, that means he has to stop crying
* get into a crouch, or on your knees, or whatever is necessary to have eye contact and be "on the same level". This shows the toddler that you're really giving him your full attention. Don't speak "down" to him.
* hug him, and touch him where you think he's hurting (touching the outside of the cheeks where the molars are growing). This will not stop the pain, but show him that you are aware of what he's going through
* give him popsicles. Keeps him hydrated, and the ice numbs the pain. I would not give him pain medication simply because you're assuming that's his problem. I am very hesitant to give any medication (even over the counter stuff) to a young child without a pediatrician recommending it
* if at all possible, change the subject. Find something exciting the toddler loves to do, something he loves to play with, somthing that fascinates him and captures his attention. Have him play with your pet (that one almost always worked for us), start some noisy toy, play music and dance with him, anything that gets his attention away from the pain.

And good luck!

Answer 8

First take deep breath this is a easy fix . Run a vacuum leaner or create white noise like static on a TV or a radio station.

Answer 9

Here is a trick that worked for me... Take a shot glass full of ice cream, microwave it for ten seconds to melt but not to get it hot, dip your finger in the ice cream and then rub it into your child's gums. Don't use this often, but it works if done occassionally. Same goes for nearly any sweet flavor....seems to get their mind off what is bothering them

Answer 10

Xylocaine. It is the stuff dentist put on your gums before they give you a shot. It is usually pink liquid sold in a bottle. Put a tiny drop on you finger and rub gently on to the gum where the tooth is coming through. It numbs the area for quite a while and will even allow him to fall asleep .I am sure that sounds wonderful to your ears. I am NOT a dentist or a doctor, so please give your dentist a call and ask if it is ok. In our house, we rub xylocaine on to mouth ulcers that don't heal or injuries on the tongue that really hurt. Instant relief from the pain.

Answer 11

It is probably just his teeth. Try ibuprofen. My oldest had his teeth coming in for 1 month. The only thing that worked was ibuprofen. Sometimes he wouldnt eat, drink or even lay down. Some children have a horrible time with their teething.