What gives you the greatest comfort when dealing with crisis in your life?

Question

When life has undermined you and left you without the certainties that just the day before you had, what do you turn to for comfort? If it is religious faith, how do you glean comfort from your beliefs? If it is intellectualism, how does the intellectual property help you gain perspective? If it is the contact of family and friends, how do they reinforce you to survive and go on?

Thanks in advance for your answers!

Answer 1

Wow, you blew me away with that question. I had never really thought of it in that way, but I believe you have hit the nail on the head with this one. I don't mean to inflate your ego (if it isn’t already big enough) but I gotta list this as one of the top ten questions I have ever read here on R&S.

Here goes, please forgive the soapbox,

My friends and family are my first sources of comfort. They are here, readily available for an encouraging word, a willing ear to hear of my heartaches, and a hand to help with my needs. But friends and family will inevitably fail you, they just are not perfect.

My intellect is a tool, I use it to problem solve, to find solutions to my distress, to help me to cope, and to make sense of the messes that I get myself into. But in the long run, my intellect is usually just not enough to get me out of, or to cope with, all of the troubles that I find myself in.

Faith in God is the hardest for me to come by. My faith at times seems so distant in times of crises, and God so silent. There are times in my life when it seems that all of my intellect and skills have failed me, and my friends stood by me dumbstruck and unable to help me, and my last hope was in a silent and distant God. And yet, even though I was in a situation that appeared impossible for me to get out of, and that I had nothing left, that I had lost everything, and the only thing that I had left in my life was my trust in God, I found out that that trust was all that I really needed. I have made it out time after time. Trust and hope are key to me now, far more powerful than my intellect and loving family and friends (which are always very important to me).

I probably shouldn't even be alive right now. I can tell you of at least two events in my past, where people have said to me, "Dude, you should be dead right now. It's a miracle that you are alive". Life is like that. Crisis’s are inevitable, and friends and intellect cannot always save you. I like to think that is when faith, trust, and hope comes into play. It has become a reoccurring theme in my life, happening too many times for it to be an accident. I don't even like to talk about it, because it is so unbelievable, but you asked, and you are a friend, and that is the best answer I have to give. I thank you for your question Jack, and all of the answers that you got, it has helped me to see things in a different light. May we all always have the soundness of mind, the love of friends, and the faith in our Creator to get us through our crises's.

Answer 2

I handle crisis by keeping the faith that something good is just around the corner.That if I work hard enough there is something better...something more. That around that corner is something that can change my life for the better as quickly as things have gotten bad. I pray and hope that what God has in mind for me is good and if it's not,that it's for a good cause and something that will better me as a person in the long run.
Intellectually I take comfort in knowing that every problem has a solution and if I don't give up I'll solve it..and even though my answer may be wrong..I'll learn from it.
Family..well..I remember the way they handeled situations and how that compares to mine...I love you no matter what would give me comfort but what the hey..you can't have it all right?
I take comfort in all these things.Crisis can be tough..I think people should take comfort in every way they can.

Answer 3

I think what many call a mid-life crisis is actually a mid-life assessment...we realize that life seems to go by more quickly each year, and we ask ourselves what are we missing, isn't there more, is what I am doing really matter, am I really happy? We can all change at any time that we choose to; so change some things....just make sure you are not throwing out the baby with the bath water....keep consistent with that which you have committed to.

Answer 4

My answer will come as no surprise--my greatest comfort in life is God. That comes from knowing that He is there with me before, during and after the crisis. He has been there my whole life and He's never going to leave me. There's something about just knowing that He is in the background with me that makes every bad situation less hopeless. I never really feel lonely even when alone, because His presence is always there in the background. To me, without that presense, I would feel hopeless if all I had to rely on was myself. He provides the strength to deal with things myself.

The importance of friends cannot be downplayed. God created another human to keep man from being lonely. Thus, I think we all have a need for human contact. In addition to God, the support and encouragement of friends is something that each of us needs to assist us in getting through times of crisis.

Answer 5

A little bit family and friends, a little bit intellectualism, a little bit bull-headed stubbornness

I gain comfort from my family and friends as they assure me I am not the first person to be in crisis and people survive it every day.. There are always those worse off than you are...

I gain perspective by bouncing ways to handle the crisis off certain family and friends (My husband and father are my usual sounding boards) Sometimes you just need someone else to listen to your idea and tell you it's a good idea so you have the confidence to go out and do it...

I am bull-headed and stubborn.. I don't easily give up even when the bumpy patches happen.. I have made it through bumpy patches before and I will make it through them again...

Answer 6

I have finally realized that I don't have to be a spiritual Einstein to go to God. My relationship is sweeter today than when I first believed. I also got over thinking that even a wonderful family and good friends can fill the void I sometimes feel. Many times my church is the pasture. I might begin trying to just tell Him how beautiful is the work of His hands, then I get a little more honest and tell Him that sometimes I think You did not take note of my pain, and why did I lose my husband when we were just planning our good life of traveling and doing our thing. I usually feel a little silly at this point, like I just told Him something He did not know. It is OK to doubt. He knows, and yet He loves. My Lord is all in all to me, and I know He loves even a sinner like me. Sad to me that sincere people try to "clean up" to try to get closer to God. He does the cleansing, and takes us from wherever we are. As far as the intellectualism, it was my best thinking that put me in the pit of despair and I took hostages. My rearview mirror reflects the carnage of my past. Forgiven, not perfect.

Answer 7

Through my intellectual property, I know things will get better.

From there, I go to family and friends. They remind me things will get better.

Then . . . I cry. A lot. I write. A lot. I mope. I let myself feel miserable for a while. And then I pick myself up and right the situation.

I've been pretty low before. I'm sure if I can survive that, I can survive anything.

Answer 8

Last weekend when I thought I had lost my mother, I faced this situation. I could not afford to travel, and knew I needed to be here with my mom.

That's when I start to really pray, and also to put out messages to friends to pray for these needs during this time.

I also look at things during that time to see what, if anything I did wrong; and what created the situation? If so, what can I do differently next time?

By the way, my mom is doing much better.

Think prayer doesn't work? Let me share one thing. I posted a message last Sunday about my mom's situation and about 10 minutes later, she finally started to respond and regained consciousness after several hours of nonresponsiveness. Coincidence, or were people praying for my mom?

Answer 9

Gratitude for another adventure. Like the Chinese, I see "crisis" as "opportunity" - unless I've lost my mast or steering in a storm which I luckily never did. Apart from the crises of crashes, it's in crises that new insights open up. You may lose everything you've gained - so then you're free of the burdens, too, and having nothing to lose, you can have a go at anything in range. What fun!

Answer 10

This is going to sound odd but it isn't anything spiritual, since I wasn't brought up with any religion, but when live gets to me its nice to know I can go outside (at work) and take a quick walk. That I can turn on my music and just relax. Going for a drive with the windows down and the music up

Its not the family and friends. Don't have too many friends and my family is the stress. Plus, I have meds to help me deal with it. (medically necessary meds that is)