Should i keep the baby or not?????????????????????? Im 18?

Question

So I found out I was pregnant about 3 days ago. Im only 18 and was with my bf 4 years. (we broke up b4 i found out). I have so much ahead of me in my future!! Im moving to Paris in sept. for school and he is also going to college. We dont want to be together. I dont no what to do. I dont no how i could ever tell my parents!!! And i want to go to Paris sooooo bad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!... My bf wants me to have an abortion and i am prob 50/50 on the idea. I dont no what to do. Please tell me what u all think!!!! ONLY NICE ANSWERS NO RUDE ONES!! THANKYOU!!
Ps. Im for choice, but im not sure yet if thats what i want to do, and adoption is not an option 4 me.

Im sorry i have already posted this but i really want many diff opinions! thankyou

i dont think i could support the baby!! Adoption is not an option bc i no i would get attached and keep the baby neways.

Answer 1

im pro choice as well, and if you think that you might be able to support the baby, then i say have the abortion. i have never been pregnant but i have been with two friends to have abortions. they tell me that it really isnt that expensive and that they tell me that i does hurt. so good luck!

Answer 2

Things happen that change your plans.............. If you truly didnt want a baby you would have been more careful.

You can give the child up for adoption but that will be in 3/4 of a year. You would have to put Paris off a year im sure. And how will it effect you, will you worry about your baby? will you long to find it later in life? WHy is adoption the only choice out of question?

You have the choice to have an abortion however do you think you will beable to live with that choice forever?

You have to make the choice. Its you that will pay for this choce for a lifetime. I think its something you need to talk over with your parents they have so much more knowledge and could help you make a good choice.


Im sorry but the desire to go to Paris is a selfish reason to abort a baby !!!!!!! You made an adult decision now you have to deal with the aftermath.

Sure you could support the baby, you work full time, and go to school at night. Get your degree and be a mom...... If you were my child Paris would be OUT>

Answer 3

From my own perspective:
My husband and I were married for a little over a year. I was in college- and we were struggling living in NY and had no one to rely on other than ourselves. I got pregnant- it was a big surprise. I had planned to continue on and get a Master's Degree- I had big dreams. I had no idea how we were going to do it.

Guess what??? We did it. Yes, we were married- but living just about the poverty line. We didn't qualify for any help because my husband made $1000.00 more a year.

I have my Master's Degree now- I worked on it a little at a time- but the plan to go right on- that changed.

Sweetie- everything changes when you have a baby. What seemed really important back then, seems silly and frivolous now.

Abortion- a friend did it in High school and cannot have children now- she had no idea why she and her husband were not able to conceive after over a year...scar tissue. She has had laproscopic surgery- and still no baby. Abortion may seem like the answer until you look at the consequences much later on- when you are ready for a baby.

You need to do a lot of thinking.
Telling your parents, sit them down. If you can, get the guy to sit with you should you decide to keep it. If you decide that you still aren't sure- talk to them beforehand and explain what your feelings are.

Yes, your heart would ache because you would give the baby up for adoption...when it's born...but why wouldn't your heart ache at the thought of ending a life during the first trimester? Right now, your baby has a heartbeat. You know, as sad as I was about getting pregnant- the heartbeat at the first ultrasound- that made my heart soar- a life so tiny- and there is a light flashing where the heartbeat is. I was only 6 weeks pregnant! That was the end of my feeling sad about the baby...that heartbeat changed something in me.

Do a lot of thinking, talk to your parents. They will be disappointed, but they will forgive you. I can't imagine anything my children could do...outside of murder- that would make me hate them. Even then, I think I could forgive.

Answer 4

You should have thought of the consequences before this happened, but it has happened so you need to make the adult decision. How will you feel a few years down the road if you have an abortion? Will you always wonder what your child would have looked like or what your baby would be in the future. This is your flesh and blood and Yes, I know Paris sounds exciting but how will you feel later in life? You do have your future ahead of you but you now have a human life growing inside you and your baby deserve a chance to. I don`t understand why you say that adoption is not an option. There are a number of couples in the world that would die to be in your condition, so don`t say No to adoption. GOOD LUCK in Your Decision, Whatever You Decide

Answer 5

If you should keep depends on if you can, after stepping back and taking a realistic look, afford to keep this child, give them a good enough life, and have the emotional support behind you that will need from your family.

If not, and at your age you very well may not be able to do that...then is it possible to old back the Paris plans for a year? If so, you could put the child up for adoption and go to Paris next year. In a sense, and I mean no offense, but it could be your own "punishment" to yourself for getting yourself into this situation...

If you are lucky, maybe you have family that would adopt the child, allowing you to turn over parental rights, allowing you to go to Paris, and yet still be able to know your child.

Answer 6

I am saying this in the nicest way I realy can......I am so anti abortion you wouldnt believe it, i even have a page just specially for this on my myspace. Abortions are horible, you have a living person inside of you, growing every day. Is it an innocent childs fault that you failed to use protection and now they are in the world? I dont mean to be rude, but think about it, if your mother told you a job and a new place to live were more important than you, what would you do? You are going to kill it because you dont want it and dont want it to ruin your life? Adoption is ALWAYS an option for anyone, I dont care who you are. There is no reason in killing an innocent child just because you think it may ruin your future. I am 25 years old as of friday and cant have kids. I would adopt one in a minute, a child someone didnt want could be the child I could love for the rest of my life. You really need to consider other options instead of being a murderer.

Answer 7

I am not pro choice, so my recommendation is the option you state is not an option. Adoption, it allows the innocent to live and give a creates a family for someone who truly wants one. I know this is not what you want to hear, but as an adoptive parent, I can not share How Much You Have to Offer This Child. Paris can wait, it will be there always. If you choose to abort, be sure it is the answer you feel comfortable with, I know many women who regret this decision for the rest of their lives.

Answer 8

That's a sad situation, honey.

I believe you have the choice over your body and your fetus. I can't understand how it's more okay in your conscience to abort than it is to carry the baby and let him or her be adopted.

How far along are you? I hope to God that you wouldn't abort a baby after 13 weeks.

This one failure to contracept has put your entire life in jeopardy. You want to go to Paris, you want to finish school, you want to have a career and a good life, and this baby is standing between all of this and where you are. It's kill (and face a future of guilt) or lose your future (and raise a child you didn't want). The only middle ground, the only compromise is adoption which is unacceptable to you. Will you listen to my story?

I come from a different view than you, I would imagine. A couple of years after my son was born, we found ourselves pregnant again and were elated. The baby started to kick, and the dr. told us we had no problems. Once you feel the baby kick, the pregnancy usually goes to term with no complications. The next visit, though, the dr. couldn't find my baby's heart beat. My baby had died (17 weeks old) for no apparent reason. It was hard, I still cry for that child, but what is really hard for me is understanding why God lets all the 13 and 14 yos have babies they don't want, can't raise, and can't afford. And my arms are empty.

I want you to have your education, and I want you to have many years to pick out the man of your dreams. I want you to plan a family together. I want everything that is the best for you.

But not at the expense of a child's life. Think about it and decide if you can put off your plans for a few months, bear this child, and then continue with all your plans. Think about whether at this stage of pregnancy is it abortion or is it murder. Think about the lonely family, like mine, who can't have any more children, whose empty arms are waiting for a blessing.

What's the best thing to do? What decision will lie most quietly in your conscience in years to come? Is there one decision you can feel good about? Pray.

I think you're really torn and that's why you want so many people to give you their opinions. You need something, someone to tell you what to do, so you can absolve yourself of all guilt.

Only 5 opinions matter, sweetie:
Yours
Baby's dad
Your parents'
God's

This is a huge decision to make, and you're only 18. You NEED your parents to help you with this. They can help take some of the burden off your shoulders. They can help with this decision. They may have ideas you haven't thought of. TELL YOUR PARENTS!!

I'll pray for you, honey.

Debbie
TX Mom
Not medical professional

Answer 9

I'm not going to give you my opinions or tell you what I think you should do. Abortion is not for everyone. Some women are fine afterwords and some end up with horrible guilt that they can't deal with. Keeping a baby isn't an easy thing either and many sacrifices would have to be made. You need to sit down with yourself and figure out what decision is best for you and the child that you're carrying. Good luck whichever way you go, Paris or parenting.

Answer 10

Please dont abort this baby in my opinion its murder. You did the deed now u have to deal with it. Please take care of that little baby growing inside of u. Why is adoption not an option they can do open adoptions..I personally could never abort nor adoption I could not bear the fact that my baby is being raised by another nor the fact I killed my baby. U need to step up and take care of this baby there r services for u. section 8 (get onthe list early)!!
WIC great help especially with formula.
I understand u want to go to school and u can they have daycare facilities right on campus. I know u must be scared to death but u r an adult now and must face facts I was prego at 19 and was so scared to tell my parents..now I have an awesome 4 y.o. and a 3 month old and could never imagine life without them!!! If they father does not want to take part get legal custody otherwise u can get child support...please dont let him convince u to abort if nothing else please adoption even open adoption...
U Can Do It!!!! Have Faith!!

Answer 11

Abortion is not a form of birth control....Adoption is always an option and a much better choice than abortion in this situation...I say weigh in everything...Can you support the kid? What kinda life will this kid have with you being without a significant other? Are the changes this is going to make on your life worth it?.....Just remember that abortion is not a form of birth control, and while in some situations abortion is called for, in this one it is not...I would say the choices are adoption or keep your son or daughter and that choice would best be made by you and not by anyone answering on here...no one on here knows your precise situation.