Why is my Momma so scared?

Question

Ok, I live right around Philadelphia (city of brotherly love, amirite?) and one of my favorite things to do is shoot some b-ball outside of my school with my friends. A few days ago, though, a couple of guys who were up to no good started making trouble in my neighborhood. I thought it would be safe to go out and play with my friends, but while I was out I got in one little fight, and when I told my mom she got all scared and started talking about sending me to live with my uncle and auntie who live near Los Angeles. I tried to talk to her about it but she was too busy drinking a fouty and eating fried chicken to listen. What should I do? I don't want to live in California because I heard from hal turner that there are gay men who will rape you in the street!!!

It's not like I tried to get in the fight. I was just sitting at the B-ball court eating some Popeye's chicken when my girl called me and told me that this sucker was telling people that I liked Mudkips. There was nothing else I could have done.

Answer 1

Lurk moar.

Answer 2

I am glad you explained your thoughts that "there was nothing" you could have done. That explains the problem.

Kids and young adults between the ages of 15 and 21 (not 18) are still prone to peer pressure and still require direct parental guidance in making decisions. Your statement shows you are vulnerable to giving in emotionally to outside pressure on your decisions and behavior. This is not your fault, but it is a fact if that is where you are right now.

If your mom is on her own, she is wise to be concerned that she cannot guide you and protect her on her own, but prefers a couple "Uncle and Aunt" to do a better job. She obviously loves you very much and is not trying to hurt you but make sure you do not get hurt.

It is out of pure love she would say something this sacrificial on her part, to put you before herself. Some parents cannot do that, and they want to control their kids even to their detriment. She wants you to have the best, even better than what she thinks she can offer to you.

However, if you want to assure your Mom that you and she can handle this together, if you want to be taken seriously as responsible and able to control your behavior without giving in to peer pressure from bad influences, then you would have to SERIOUSLY consider what you "could have done" instead of getting into a fight. SERIOUSLY, not denying or justifying but admitting you do not need to respond to "words" with actions. Actions can beget actions, such as someone physically attacking you justifies physically defending yourself. But words can be answered with words. Or by getting away from conflict and resolving issues on safe ground, not in the midst of emotions or in dangerous company. That is not the place for that.

So you would have to sit down with your mom and maybe agree on a counselor or mentor and a process by which you would review your situation and make decisions "together."

Again, from the ages of 15-21, it is natural for young people to work WITH a parent to make decisions together, and only after 21 are most people fully mature as an independent adult. There are just too many emotional influences and stages a person has to go through in the mind and socially before you can separate yourself from the emotional and social pressures of other people, so that is what your mom is worried about.

She loves you very much, and if you recognize that and thank her for that, she will understand you are trying to listen to her and to understand what to do to stay out of trouble.

Pick a counselor or church or family friend, or neighbor you trust and work out an agreement with your mom. If it doesn't work, then going to California doesn't have to be bad either.

but I recommend talking it out with your mom, and another person if that helps, and making a decision TOGETHER. You will show you are ready to act maturely and responsibly. If you can't do that, maybe she is right that you need stronger mentors and she doesn't think she can do that alone for you.

Love, Emily

Answer 3

wow that sounds like my mom a bit stubborn and ''closes her head'' its annoying i know i know what your dealing with but she is not scared for herself but she is actually scared for your safety especially with all of these things happeneing out there nowadays she is concerned for your safety and then again i am against her decision because she needs to let you be a little more free im not saying go fight people but be safe make smart reasonable decisions but talk to your mom and tell her how you feel and let out what you feel about this situation not in a yelling tone but in a firm way. Good luck with our mom :)

Answer 4

a couple of guys who were up to no good started making trouble in my neighborhood..fresh prince of bel air,ahhah ok srry

uhm im guessing ur a guy,since ur afraid of gays,AND
ANYONE could rape u anywhere,not just in L.A
u rmom wants u to be safe,instead of getting into fights.

u should show her u arent going to get her into any fights,like when ur out,DONT GET INTO ANY

though u cant inforce her to make her let u stay in phily.
L.A might be better for u.

Answer 5

i don't comprehend how previous you're, yet my advice could have been to not date the guy in the 1st place. IWhen you date a guy who has massive issues up in the air like a sparkling infant, dealing with divorce, etc., you may especially plenty assure you will not win in the top...notwithstanding if he does not land up returned along with her. additionally, i ask your self how she felt understanding that he became into with somebody else whilst she became into pregnant?? women do not hardship to sense any compassion for another anymore, and men do not supply a crap initially. i wish you think of approximately issues because of fact karma particular does chew on occasion.

Answer 6

Just whistle for a cab and when it comes near, the license plate will say fresh and there will dice on the mirror.

Answer 7

HA!

& That is how you became the Prince of a little town called Bel Aire?

Answer 8

move in with your auntie and uncle in Bel-air. whistle for a cab, and when it comes near, the license plate says "Fresh" and ther are dice in da mirror. of anything I could say, this cab was rare, but nah forget it. go home! to Bel-air!

Answer 9

its a moms instinct to worry. let her do her thing. talk to her about it and reason with her. if you make her understnad why you love philly so much (or why you dont want to go to CA; and the gay men thing isnt a good excuse) she might stop worrying so much. assure her that you will be careful and take care of yourself, and she should be back to not worrying so much.

Answer 10

Freak!