Why dont guys take no for an answer?

Question

My husband is over in iraq and I guess guys think thats an open opportunity. When i tell them no, I guess they think they hear,"Chase me im vulnerable" or some crap like that. what can i say to them so theyll stop and realize theyre being pricks? Im having a real problem with one in particular coming around my home.

I dont understand why people think im welcoming this. These are people i work with and the guy lives down the street who keeps coming over. if i wanted it, id just fu** him.

Answer 1

Not to be rude...but I am an army wife, my husband is deployed and I dont have that problem, maybe because I dont put myself in the situation to be "chased" ....how do these men know your husband is deployed? unless you are telling them....or they are rear d....how did he find out where u live? and why havent you taken legal action, such as calling the police if it is really bothering you? Also your husband has enough to worry about being deployed..hopefully this doesnt get back to him, then he will have to wonder and worry about his wife and why is she making herself available for men to chase her

Answer 2

This is a recurring problem for military wives; and I'm sorry to say that many of them welcome it. There's an unspoken and rather troglodytic attitude in the military, of "what happens TDY, stays TDY"... kind of like the equally troglodytic civilian credo of "what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas". Some people are very immature, and don't put any weight nor value into the commitment other people put into their relationships; they think that since "everyone is up for grabs", that everyone else must think the same way they do. Ironically, this is literally what an "infidel" is, to coin a commonly used colloquialism your husband's probably hearing a lot where he is. It's a rampant problem in the military, and I have yet to see the military put any thought or effort into even addressing it, much less fixing it.

The best thing you can do for yourself is to avoid places where single men hang out, even if you go with friends; that means bars, pubs, clubs, all of that. Single men, especially those looking to hook up, think that any woman not accompanied by another male is there because they, too, want to hook up; they don't comprehend that other people might just be there to enjoy themselves and not be looking to sack up with someone. Unfortunately, these Neanderthals are the same who don't take no for an answer, nor have any problem cheating with married women or women whose husbands or boyfriends are deployed. They're opportunistic, lowlife scum, and the best thing you can do is avoid going places where guys like that hang out. Next, stop any and all contact with the ones who are still after you; talking to them at all or seeing them at all only encourages them, despite the fact that you tell them you're not interested (after all, if you weren't interested, you wouldn't be talking to them anymore, would you?) Third, if they continue to hound you, get serious and get nasty, and tell them that if they don't knock it off, it's the police next; and carry out that threat if they persist. You have to remember that these guys are at the same time predators and vultures; they're opportunistic and will look for any prey they think is easy. Predators and scavengers alike usually prefer to avoid prey that fights back, especially if they do so viciously.

Stick with friends you both know and trust, and stick to your guns. Being a military spouse is not easy, and this widespread but not commonly-acknowledged problem is one of the biggest reasons why.

Answer 3

no offence but why is he coming around your home in the first place i am married to a solider in iraq too and i have been hit on more than a few times i simply tell them i am married and never even look at them again he shouldnt even be comming around your home in the first place unless he knows where you live i dont tell people where i live i just dont want that kind of annoyance mabe he is your husband freind and if he is in that case you should tell your husband and you both should never ever even look at him again.

if he is bugging you that much simply tell him dont ever talk to me again if he keeps up next time he shows up call the military police have him escorted away and the thrid time get a restrainig order on him with guys sometimes you have to have guts and just tell them to take a long walk off a short peer he is offending you by calling you a cheater if you think about it by not leaving you alone.

Answer 4

If one of them is following you around your house then you should call the cops. That is considered stalking and if it is making you feel uncomfortable then take legal action. If they dont take no for an answer then just walk away and dont look back. Avoid them all together until your husband gets back. Make sure you flash your ring in their faces as well, that always helps them move on to other people.

Answer 5

Start taking out some warrants and see if they get the message.
For the one coming around your home,look into a restraining order.
Get a pistol just in case that the message does not get through.If he comes in,shoot him.
That should pour a whole lot of cold water on all of it.
If they will not listen to reason,let them suffer for their foolhardiness.
Life is not a game,maybe they never learned that.

Answer 6

Pretty sure as has been stated this is common if not "normal"
behavior for military families who are sepparated by deployment.

most likely your in situations that you should not be in making you look like your availible, or part of the "Common" bunch that does indulge in this action.

Stop going out to clubs,bars,etc and or dressing like a whore, if you do. You may* be inviting these actions on yourself.

There is no reason to frequent any such place unless you are looking for companionship, thats why these places were invented. Then add alcohol and guess what you get ? trouble.

Answer 7

stick a post it on his forehead ( get lost) backwards of course so he can read it in the mirro and tell the loser to leave. Then call the police. Or tell me where the jerk is and I'll have him waking up in a foreign country. Our solders deserve more then some creepy working on they're wife.

Answer 8

Tell him to get lost or you will have a restraining order taken out on him. If he is military, tell him you will report him to his CO. If he can't take the hint, then follow through.

Answer 9

If he's military, call his commander. If not, call the police.

Thanks to your husband for his service. And you too - I consider the whole family to be "serving" by making the sacrifices they make.

Why do men do it? Ego, childishness, not understanding how their actions hurt others.

Good luck. God bless.

Answer 10

Tell them you're a hermaphrodite- it works for me.