Met this guy that was 10 years younger then me. I lied and told him I was only 6 years younger. He and I dated for awhile and now that is over, not for the age, more the differences. We just needed different things for the relationship, ie: attention/affection.
I now wonder why it was a big deal, is it??
He 36 I am 46
2007-07-25 05:09:38 · 29 answers · asked by Elizabeth S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It shouldn't have been a big deal, but your lie prevented him from being able to decide for himself if it was any kind of issue or not. What gave you the right to decide for him that 10 yrs was too much? Would you want someone making those decisions for you?
If you can't be straight up about who and what you are, then you have no business dating. If someone is going to discount you for any reason then they aren't a good match for you. A relationship based on a lie (or lies) doesn't have much of a future anyway...
2007-07-25 05:13:52 · answer #1 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
No it's not a big deal. You are both adults, And it just didn't work out. If he was 18 and you were 28 then that would be a bit different. But you were on the same plain of dating and maturity. And do you think you are the first women to lie about there age. I don't know how many women I have met who are 26 and have been the same age for the last 4 years. So don't feel to bad. I feel bad that it didn't work out for you, but there are quality men who don't care about age. And 10 years is nothing. So don't sweat it, and there is always botox if anyone questions your age. Hope this helps.
-Ty
-Ty
2007-07-25 12:18:00 · answer #2 · answered by Tyler C 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Age is truly not a bigger factor when it comes to relationships and dating. Many seem to think that age is a turn off depending on how much older or how much younger the other is. It seems that todays standards are simply based off that the man should be the older one in the relationship and that if the women is older it should only be by a couple months. However, these standards don't apply to everyone but do affect most peoples views on relationships. If the man that you're with truly likes you for you age shouldn't matter in the end and it should be based off of personality and well being. Hopefully my answer helps you understand what you were hoping to understand. Best of luck!
2007-07-25 12:17:08 · answer #3 · answered by Liz 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Lies are lies. And Lies are wrong. Especially if you continue the lie well into the relationship. If he thought a 40 year old woman was hot, then he would have thought a 46 year old woman was hot. It is your own insecurity about your age and dating a younger man that made you feel like you needed to lie. Don't do it anymore, it is wrong. A relationship should be based off of trust, and when that trust is violated (even in small ways, like this 'little white lie') the relationship is undermined.
2007-07-25 12:13:48 · answer #4 · answered by HooliganGrrl 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
It depends on each person. At that age, it doesn't matter about 10 years to me. Now if the ages were 15 and 25, that is a problem. They wouldn't be at the same maturity level. I would prefer within a 5 year range for me, older wise.
I fully believe that you should be honest or the relationship is based on a lie from the start. Not a good combination to begin a good relationship.
You will find the right person who is good for only you. Have patience and I will pray for you.
2007-07-25 12:14:03 · answer #5 · answered by Stephanie F 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well I say age is always a big deal and for the very reason you found out for yourself. I mean as many people say that age does not matter and I have said it a few times myself until I realized age does matter. I mean with age comes different and certain experiences people have that really show someone where their maturity is, their goals, their future plans, all that which they are. I mean you wouldn't really think that 10 years be such a bad difference. But if he is still in bachelor like mode and hasn't really learned much from his previous relationships or much from life then yea he would be in a much different place. As for you, you could have gone through many break ups or going through bouts of making bad decisions with guys and what not. So yea, age is a really big deal in that way. With age comes a certian amount of experience that is what I think. So it really does matter in a really big way.
2007-07-25 12:21:39 · answer #6 · answered by Cursed_Romantic 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I think that is a bit of an age difference. I have a rule, u can lie about ur age up to 4 years difference, but it does depend on how old u really r. If u can pull of 10 years younger go for it. I'm 12, but i can pull of a 15 year old, trust me, i've done it.
2007-07-25 12:14:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
It's a big deal that you felt you had to lie and then never came clean to him.
That's not a great way to start a relationship--if you start it off with lies, nothing good is going to come of it.
The age difference isn't a huge deal. What IS a huge deal is that you admit that you lied but see no fault in it.
2007-07-25 12:13:08 · answer #8 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Not that big of a deal, but sometimes a large age difference can cause problems in a relationship. Like you said, you two needed and wanted different things. That happens sometimes. Sometimes it works out, but I think you should try to find someone closer to your own age. Good luck!
2007-07-25 12:13:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
What difference does it make,the relationship is over.But next time be honest.Little white lies always seem to come out in the long run.I also think you need to stop being a cougar.There are plenty of attractive men in your own age group.Me for example.
2007-07-25 12:18:10 · answer #10 · answered by Buck 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋