Why people leave their parents to old home?

Question

I just cant understand why people leave their parents to old home? They should remember that their parents were did their best for devoloping their children's future, even if they have such a limited economic boundation,they sacrifice their whole life for children but when they bcome old, these so calld children throw them to OLD HOME for saying they are thorn of their freedom. Why? why they do like this? They should remember that one day they will also become old and what will happen, if their children will throw them like this? some men says becouse of their wifes wish I have to leave my parents.. But I dont thing this is a strong reason, if man have that afection for their parents no one can sand old parents away from home.

Answer 1

Well, firstly I think it depends on the circumstances. Sometimes elderly people have illnesses or disabilities that require such a high level of medical care that staying at home just isn't possible, and the grown up children aren't able to give that kind of care.
That said, I can't understand people who won't take an elderly parent into their home, they are an important part of the family. I think the fact is that we've become a very mercenary society, and we 'throw away' people when they're no longer useful to us. Sad but true. Some people also can't cope. Speaking from personal experience, caring for a parent is incredibly demanding. I've cared for my parents officially for just over 2 years, unofficially I cared for them many years before that. It affects your personal, social and work life, you become stressed out and feel under constant pressure, it's exhusting and often unrewarding, and you feel incredibly isolated socially, especially when the rest of the family doesn't do a thing to help. Some people are not in the position to be able to cope with this, especially if they've got full time jobs, young children, etc. However, I knew after my Mum passed away that I would have regretted not being the one to help her when she needed it, so I do understand where you're coming from! IDK, it all depends on personal reasons I guess. Hope this helped.

Answer 2

Sometimes it is a burden. Sometimes the parents need round the clock nursing care and both the husband and wife work to support the family they created together. I don't think all nursing homes are bad and I don't think kids that put their parents in a home are bad. Since you know so much, why don't you open up an adult day care service so people can have their parents at home, still work to put food on the table, and then you all high and mighty can come in and feed the parents and change adult diapers. How's that for you?

Answer 3

My husband's grandparent's are 86 yrs. old and his grandfather had a stroke, the grandmother could no longer help him get around the house.. My in laws both in their late 50's early 60's still work full-time... They ended up putting the parents in an assisted living apt. that's near where they live.. It's a really nice place where they can get nurses, housekeeping, meals in a cafeteria/restaurant setting as well as transportation if they need it... They were going to sell their house/grandparents house and buy another everyone could live in so they could care for them, but the expense and the level of work involved for all was overwhelming.. This was the better solution.. While it allows my in-laws to work full-time, keep their home and still have the parent's close by under supervision. They are still able to drive if they choose and not feel like a burden to anyone....

Answer 4

Some people do it because their parents can get better care in an old home. Some elderly people need more medical care than a layperson can give. Some elderly people don't want to live with their kids. Some of these homes have many benefits for the elderly including medical specific meals, group activities, and companionship with people their own age. Personally, I have both my mother AND my grandmother living with me. I do hope that I won't have to put them in an old home, but if the day comes that it is better for them to put them there for their own health, I will.

Answer 5

Some people have no choice. They would have to quit their jobs and still have to hire a home nurse to care for their parents. For people that care about and love their parents, it's a very hard descision to have to send them into such a place. It's extremely difficult to with a older person who needs to be bathed, wears a diaper, has a catheter, needs multiple medications, and several other needs that the average person cannot provide. You must also be able to pick up that person which will cause a health risk to you. In addition to you would have to attend classes to learn to provide care for parent wich will cost you additional money. Having somone at home that needs constant care is an emotional drain on everyone, not to mention that it is VERY expensive. You would never be able to leave the house with out hiring somone to come stay with your parent.

Caring for an aling parent is very difficult so it dosen't make somone horrible for placing their parent in the nursing home or a retirement home. It's often better off for that person because of the expericienced care they will recieve around the clock.

Answer 6

Our family takes care of our family members until we no longer can medically. We have had family members WANT to move into assisted living because they felt it gave them their independence still while having help 24/7 if need be. Until you have experienced it, don't you dare judge those of us who have. It has NOTHING to do with not loving a parent or spouse or any other family member for that matter. For some families, nursing homes are the only answer due to medical reasons. I watched my father in law die at home where we took care of him and had hospice here as well. My uncle on the other had HAD to have constant medical attention which could not be given inside any home. For the dolt that answered about muslim and islam.....you need to get off your high horse. My grandmother is in her late 90's and I absolutely love having her in my home and she doesn't have to cover her body and face up like she would have to do in other countries!!! It has NOTHING to do with not wanting an "old" person in the house. It is a personal preference for any family and their reasons are just that...their reasons and who are you to judge when you can't even spell?

Answer 7

My mom sent my grandma to a home because she was very nearly brain dead and couldn't even feed herself. She has been having relatively regular mini-strokes for the past 15 years, so she was really messed up. It has gotten to the point that she can't even talk, and is nearing a vegetative state. She had in home care for awhile, but they don't have any medical training so if she had another stroke or something they couldn't do anything. That and it was ungodly expensive. we couldn't afford the equipment to have her live in our home either.

Don't you dare judge us!

Answer 8

This is out come of capitalism.
The capitalism has lead the society towards materialism and caused two major loses.
1- sense of sacrifice
2- some of the human values
Capitalism has disturbed the basic institution of society i.e.family and has weakened the natural bond between parents and children. The kids need time and attention of their parents. When we leave them at the mercy of day care center and don't pay our duties properly with the purpose of earning more to enjoy the life maximum; we should expect the same response from our kids.

Answer 9

they don't love their parents and love their partner than their own parents, they don't want to see an old people in the house.

But in the Muslim world they are not like these. they love the old people. also Islam teach that you can't enter paradise without parents parents forgiveness.

Answer 10

some people are just inconsiderate.