My soon to be husband has bipolar desease and outbursts happen all the time, how do I keep an outburst from turning into an arguement on a personal level?
2007-07-14 09:35:17 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Other - Health
He needs medical help, needs to be on medication. I know of someone that is married to someone with bipolar and it just got worse and worse. He refuses to see a doctor, blames everything on her and they are currently separated and I don't see a resolution. Outbursts, money spending...etc.
2007-07-14 09:38:43 · answer #1 · answered by steffers27 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It depends a lot on how severe the condition is. I dated a girl in high school who had a mild bipolar disorder. The mood swings ranged from hyper-spastic fun girl to moody mean girl. None of them were too bad. When she was on Prozac, she was a homogeneously mild-mannered (and kinda boring) girl.
A friend from college had a much worse case. She was basically a character on Sesame Street on the upswings. On the downswings, she was not even functional. She had one of her lows while she happened to be alone on a trip to Manhattan. She wondered around Manhattan for about 24 hours in a daze before finally going to a hospital because she was tired and, "they had beds there." She was a very sweet person, so never turned mean. She just got despondent an zoned out. For her, medication was necessary.
As for your situation, it doesn't sound like he is dangerous without medication -- you could probably go without it. It's usually better to avoid medication unless it's really necessary. You'll have to just disengage your emotions and needs during the bad times and be very nice to him, but passively resistant when you can. Just try to turn the argument away and change the subject... distract him somehow. And find a way to occupy him during those bad times. Find something he likes to do, like a good movie or show on TV or something like that, and get him to do that. Idle minds are the worst thing in the downtimes.
2007-07-18 03:59:44 · answer #2 · answered by yodadoe 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First off, let me express my sympathy for you. I dated a girl a few years ago who had bipolar. I had a crush on her for almost 5 years and finally she agreed to go out with me, and we started dating and eventually moved in together, so i was able to fully experience "living with someone who has bipolar."
First off, if your fiance has been diagnosed with bipolar he should be on some type of prescription medication that he should be taking daily. If he does not take the medication then I would honestly say, break up with him and move on. In all honesty, the disease will make so much of your marriage miserable, and other parts wonderful. This also depends on the severity of his bipolar.
Remember, bipolar used to be called Manic Depression. There will be times where he will be Mr. Wonderful, and times where he will make you wonder how you married him. I would tell you to find ways to get him to take his medication, and if he ever does say something that becomes a personal attack, try to remember, he's not in his right mind. say to him, "i know you don't mean that." or make sure he ends up realizing that he's turning something stupid into a personal attack that is uncalled for.
I wish you a lot of luck and happiness.
2007-07-14 09:43:41 · answer #3 · answered by matcoach2382 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You cannot control his outbursts, he needs medication to keep them under control. Bipolar is a chemical imbalance that occurs in the body and can only be controled with meds.
If your husband to be is not under meds or treatment of any kind, then his outbursts will get continue. Life will be hell.
2007-07-14 09:40:34 · answer #4 · answered by cruisechloe 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The most important safeguards would be to insure that your husband is taking his bipolar medication as directed by his doctor. If the medication appears to be inaffective he may need a follow-up visit to his primary care doctor to see if other bipolar meds help. But, again a person cannot skip medications and must take them exactly as directed. Some people with bipolar skip meds thinking that they are ok and don't need them.
2007-07-14 09:41:07 · answer #5 · answered by Charles R 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
it will always turn personel if you let it. if he isn't medicated, seriously look into it. it will make a world of difference. for the most part, he can not control this but he can control meds.admitting he needs them is half his battle. the key here is realizing when he's on his way to crashing. cut it off at the pass.if you don't think you'll be able to talk it through, leave the situation til he calms down b/c sometimes, the more you try to rectify an argument the more aggitated he can become. i have to say, this could be pretty tough for you. get him to the doc and make him take his meds.
2007-07-14 09:47:32 · answer #6 · answered by racer 51 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love him just keep understanding. Is he on any meds or in counseling? If not maybe you should discuss that with him. I have Bipolar disorder and the one thing I need is support,understanding,patience,and love. Bipolar is a mental disorder but it is not an excuse for bad behavior as long as he is getting treatment and doing his part to manage it then do what I said. If he is not doing those things then hes not helping himself and if thats the case ask yourself if this is how you want to live the rest of your life. You cant help someone that doesn't want to help themselves.
2007-07-14 09:47:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
well im bipolar. and many people in my family and in my life are too. its kind of strange. before i started having sypmtoms of bipolar, i had to deal with my mom. she has one of the worst cases of manic depression that doctors have seen. its hard to deal with. when she has episodes its terrible. ive caught her attempting suicide many times. its painful to see. my dad is also bipolar but he isnt in my life. my grandpa was also bipolar and commit suicide when my dad was 3. bipolar is a terrible disorder that brings so much pain to my heart and probably lots of other peoples hearts as well. and yet i find it to be something that makes me... well... me. no one else experiences what i experience. those experiences make me a stronger person. you should know that too. no one else will experience what u do with your partner. it will be hard to get through make sure they take their medicine. if things get worse they need to go to a mental hospital. ur going to have to drag them there too its going to be hard and a very emotional time but thats the only way they can get through it. my mom always got better when she came back from the hospital
2016-05-17 21:29:39 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he on meds? My sister is bipolar and has been on meds since she was 14. She is in her late 30s, married and 2 teen sons. It is hard, I know, a lot of the time. You really need to talk to a specialist to know what you are getting into. I am NOT trying to discourage you. Everyone needs a loved one, but my family has had a rough, rough time of it the last 20 plus years. (So has my brother in law.) He, fortunately is a "roll with the punches" type guy.
2007-07-14 09:40:31 · answer #9 · answered by CAT 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Make sure he takes his medication regularly and sees his therapist. Learn to see the signs of a breakthrough early on. You will probably get good at it. Develop a trust with him that he realizes you are not out to get him when you tell him that he is starting to "spin."
My sister is bipolar, and I know how my family dealt with it.
2007-07-14 09:39:45 · answer #10 · answered by Mr. G 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋