I often wonder if its right for one parent to scold the child and the other to pacify the child in the presence of the other parent.
For example if my mom scolds me, my dad sort of pacify me (he is always the good cop) in the presence of my mom by showing some sort of disapproval at the kind of purnishment I got, and this always works on me. That is, I become real happy that one of my parent is the the good cop.
Is it right for parents to do this and for a child to always stop crying because the dad/mom does not approve of a certain purnishment or seem to be in support of the child?
2007-07-01 20:31:56 · 13 answers · asked by Cleopatra 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
No it should always be equal, no contradiction from either partner. Its not fair to make one the bad cop, because its easier being the good cop.
2007-07-01 20:35:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
A 5 365 days previous won't be able to be arrested era. regulation states that criminal rationale won't be able to be shaped till the age of seven years previous. Even then you somewhat may well be stressful pressed to have a cop arrest absolutely everyone under the age of 11. he's the fabricated from undesirable parenting. the main you're able to do is positioned a decision into Social centers and say the youngster is a challenge and additionally you have reason to believe there is a few thing incorrect interior the abode. they'll inspect. different than that, manage it. he's a infant, while he grows older i'm confident he gets smacked around some circumstances while he starts off to mouth off to the cops and he won't be able to apply the "i'm a juvenile" excuse anymore. or you will possibly desire to talk with the mothers and fathers in rigidity, as in no longer by your self. capability in numbers. the only ingredient the police will do is knock on thier door, tell them they might desire to administration thier infant or get a quotation for nerve-racking the peace. in case you have teenagers his age, tell them to knock his tooth out with one reliable punch while he bothers them.
2016-10-03 09:39:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Parents should decide in private how to deal with their child misbehaving. If they play good cop bad cop - the child will end up manipulating one parent against the other.
For the kid this works for the moment - but it doesn't go over well in the long run for how to deal with life. It just teaches kids how to manipulate people.
2007-07-01 20:52:27 · answer #3 · answered by beach 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't know, I'd say if you want to discipline children, there has to be some firm boundaries that can't be crossed. To teach the mthi, sometimes you have to have tough love & that isn't easy....so it's good to have a parent authprity position who ease the scolding I'd say,otherwise it's 2 powerful parental authorites against a helpless child & I guess that can't be very loving...
I'd suggest read: Families & How to Survivr them by John Cleese & Robin Skynner.
2007-07-03 10:27:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Generally, 'No,' this is not good - as in 'not positive.'
It provides the child with mixed and likely confusing messages as to what is / not 'good' (acceptable) behaviour.
It then teaches the child to be able to 'turn on the waterworks' and 'manipulate' situations.
A 'united front' is by far the best for the parent~child relationship.
Sash.
2007-07-02 03:20:34 · answer #5 · answered by sashtou 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely not, parents should be a united front. I think they should talk about, and work out how they are going to deal with discipline or whatever with the children before they actually have to deal with it.
2007-07-01 20:57:59 · answer #6 · answered by myleslr 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
parents must show that they are both in agreement... but theres nothing wrong with good cop giving the child a cuddle after the telling off.
2007-07-01 20:37:45 · answer #7 · answered by lastofthewonderfullpeople 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
my parents are "I'm not interested" and "It's your fault" cops.
not good
good cop / bad cop can't be good, because the child doesn't know then if it really did or didn't do something wrong ... and if somebody is punishing you for something you did, but don't see it wrong, is bad. it made me feel unloved and a victim of injustice ...
2007-07-01 20:40:17 · answer #8 · answered by tricky 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes as long as the bad cop doesn't throw you down the stairs or beat you where the bruise won't show with a rolled up yellow pages.
2007-07-01 20:39:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
It will confuse the child...you both have to agree, also i think that is when favouritism comes in..
2007-07-01 20:37:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋