Flirtation and sin....?

Question

I admit it: I am a terrible flirt! I love flirting, do it constantly, flirt with both men and women, have probably flirted with a lot of the regulars on here. If I haven't gotten around to you yet, your turn is coming.

Here's the thing; I'm an Atheist, my girlfriend is Christian. She takes the point of view that flirting is as bad as cheating, and she bases it on some Biblical principle or other. I've been unfaithful to her in the past, and so I think this is something she's sensitive about.

I have to stress, however, flirting is not cheating. It isn't! I think that my girlfriend is using her religion to criticize an innocent behaviour of mine that she doesn't like. Beating me up with God, as it were. Where exactly in the Bible does it say "thou shalt not flirt"? I think flirting makes people feel good---how can she justify her belief that it is equal to cheating with religion......?

This flirtatious question has been brought to you courtesy of Jack

Answer 1

It's mean and distrespectful to her to flirt with others, especially since she has told you it bothers her AND you chated on her before. No one deserves that B.S., Grow up and shame on you. It doesn't have anything to do with religion, you're just a dick.

Answer 2

Pretty sure the Bible does not say anything about flirting.

I assume that your flirting has led to the unfaithfulness in your past. So, she probably associates that flirting with the unfaithfulness, hence, her beating you up with it.

Jack . . . I know you love her and all, but . . . . seriously . . . . how do you two make this relationship work?

And not that you are looking for advice, but I'm also a natural flirt. Not flirting back with you has been a challenge. It's so easy to fall into. But 1) I didn't want to encourage you considering your girlfriend is one of my contacts as well, and 2) I've found love so deep and true that even flirting feels wrong. Flirting, like tickling, always starts fun, but then it ends horribly, usually with someone crying or wetting themselves.

Wait . . . .

Answer 3

I can understand that she is feeling jealous.
It is usually (and I emphasize the word "usually") the man's behaviour, or in turn the woman's behaviour, that makes the other person jealous, or not.
As your bi, she has to watch out for both sexes ! That's alot of eye work.
She must also be jealous of Yahoo Q&A....!?
You've scored nearly 3000 points since mid may (congratulations!).
Wouldn't it be a good idea to go and spend some luxury time with your girlfriend now ;)

P.S. By the way Jack B, I like your questions (so please don't stop all together) ;)

P.P.S I love to flirt too but ONLY with a man who interests me. I can't understand flirting with someone, just for flirting's sake. Maybe flirting reassures you somehow...? ;)

Answer 4

I am not religious at all. I do not think flirting is appropriate when you are in a relationship with someone. It is not innocent and it can easily get out of control. It is very disrespectful to the person you are with and it is also a very selfish, self absorbed thing to do. This has nothing to do with what God commands, it is just basic human decency. If you want to flirt, break up with your girlfriend first, then your flirting will be harmless. Right now it is hurting your girlfriend.

Answer 5

There you go unequally yoked. When a yoke is placed on two oxen they will turn in the same direction. It appears and understand me if what you say means you are not turning in her direction. What does one expect. Is your behavior innocent? Love 1 corinthians 13.talks about selfishness and seeking your own pleasures. It seems to be all about you. You spoke about past history of being unfaithful....She is in sin because she puts her trust in you...It is frustrating her faith in God. If makes you feel good. but it does not make her feel the same. People flirt for comfirmation ....am I attractive? Do I still got it? what? She is holding on to someone that will never change. Pretty boy!

Answer 6

To answer you: The bible does not say "Thou shalt not flirt", however it does say that if you look upon a person with lust in your heart, it is the same as adultery. The reason is because what you conceive in your heart is really where you stand. When you are flirting with someone else, that tells her that you really still want to be playing the field.

Answer 7

She is using religion because it's the crutch she knows. Otherwise she would have to tell you that you flirting with other people makes her feel insecure and frightened that you will cheat on her again. That can be hard to admit.
If you want to stay with this girl try to lighten up on the flirting.
Flirting may not be cheating - but plenty of times it can be the first step down that road. (When you cheated on her chances are that it started with flirting.)

Answer 8

the guideline is chastity till now marriage and constancy after marriage. Flirting is an interest designed to get the attention of the different intercourse. So while you're unmarried and finding for a mate, then flirting is a organic commencing factor for that technique. although, while you're already linked to a mate, then flirting outdoors your marriage could be inviting the attention of yet another and can desire to convey approximately a disastrous affair. while you're flirting as a manner to toy with the thoughts of your sufferer, then your flirting turns into manipulative, devious and mean lively. So via all potential have relaxing attracting your destiny mate yet do no longer lead human beings on and be mean approximately it and don't be untrue via attracting somebody outdoors of your marriage. that would desire to muddy your waters slightly as antagonistic to clearing it up.

Answer 9

Wait, you cheated on her before and still flirt with people and wonder why she doesn't like it?

To answer the question: flirting is wrong because of what it represents: sex. Maybe a bit toned down, but in essence, it's the same thing. You're not being a very good boyfriend.

Answer 10

Flirting is great fun. Religion, on the other hand, isn't. Flirting is not a sin, either. It is not cheating, as long as your flirtatiousness does not land you up in bed with someone other than your partner.

How does your appointment diary look? Booked for a year? Sighhhhhhhh :-P

Answer 11

I'm glad you are over your hangover, did the orange juice help. According to the bible, not me.

The Bible does not specifically talk to us about whether or not flirting is wrong, so what we should do is examine the definition of flirting. According to Merriam-Webster, flirting is: a) to behave amorously without serious intent, or b) to show superficial or casual interest or liking. It is synonymous with the word “trifle,” which is something of little value. The next thing we should examine is what people are usually trying to accomplish when they flirt. Are they trying to get attention from others, whether it is negative or positive? Are they attempting to show sexual interest or attraction? Do they see it as “innocent fun,” even if they or the other person is involved with someone else, even married?

Having casual contact with someone while purposely entertaining sexual undertones can be dangerous for us spiritually. Although most people believe that as long as nothing physical takes place, what goes on in our minds is irrelevant, the Bible tells us otherwise. “But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust in his eye has already committed adultery with her in his heart. So if your eye – even if it is your good eye – causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell” (Matthew 5:28-19).

Sin begins in our minds and then moves to our hearts. Matthew 12:35 tells us that “A good person produces good words from a good heart, and an evil person produces evil words from an evil heart.” It is a fact that whatever we surround ourselves with, whatever we indulge ourselves in, and whatever we fill our minds with is what we will become. This is why Philippians 4:8 says, “Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”

Although flirting is almost always described as “harmless,” it rarely, if ever, actually is. The first thing to consider is what people generally think about those who flirt. A woman who flirts, for example, will develop a reputation for herself as being promiscuous. She will find that other women look at her as a threat and take an instant disliking to her. A man who flirts will be viewed as a womanizer who is not interested in serious relationships. Anyone who flirts may enjoy the attention, but the interest shown to that person is almost exclusively sexual, and will probably lack any sense of respect.

The Bible tells us that we are to be a good example, showing others the love of Christ through our behavior (Ephesians 5:1-2). It is possible that a man or woman who is being flirted with has been struggling with lustful thoughts themselves. When a person of the opposite sex is hanging on them, winking at them, touching them, or showing off their body to them, it will make the person's struggle all the more difficult. The Bible strongly warns us against tempting others to sin (Matthew 18:7). We should do all we can to bring others into God's Kingdom and never do anything that would cause a person to stumble in their Christian walk (Romans 14:21). 1 Corinthians 10:31 reminds us, “Whatever you eat or drink or whatever you do, you must do all for the glory of God.”