I am a Bride-to-Be, about to be married in 19 days and I am really excited to be getting married to the man of my dreams. Lately though, I have getting really depressed and moody & it really doesn't feel like I am getting married. I have gone through a lot of family drama through the whole wedding process and because of it my parents won't be at the wedding. I don't know if all this depressing and sadness (about my parents) is just coming to a head or whats wrong with me, but I wanna enjoy these next couple weeks and I need some ideas on how I can do this. Any of you ladies experienced this before your weddings? Honest and helpful answers need only apply! Thank you!
2007-07-01 09:13:36 · 12 answers · asked by Tiffany 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I understand how you feel. I'm getting married in 6 weeks and my grandmother was hospitalized this past weekend. It was a really shock to the family and it's put a damper on my excitment.
Also, I don't know what it is about me but I've been overly self concious lately too....Like today, for example, someone I know said to me, "You've been losing weight" and (I didn't really think I *needed to) I totally freaked out (in my head) I kept thinking to myself, Did I look bad to begin with? or What does she think about me? and then it turned into, Oh god am I going to look bad at my wedding? For no apparent reason I just seem to be taking EVERYTHING to heart. It's weird.
My best advice to you (and I should take it myself) is to relax. This is supposed to be the happiest time in your life and the only and most important thing right now is that you're about to make that lifetime commitment to a man you love more than anything else in the world. Knowing that, should make you happy!
Good luck, sorry you're going through this. I feel ya.
2007-07-01 10:09:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Congratulations on your upcoming wedding! I am so sorry that you are having difficulties during what should be a joyous time in your life. I think that emotions really run high around weddings and this causes people to make irrational, emotionally charged decisions. Your parents not coming is what all of your nerves are centering around, and rightfully so...that would be stressful. Try to talk to your parents and leave all bad feelings at the door. Just tell them that you would hate for them not to be there because of, what will be in five years, a silly argument. If your parents still chose to not attend, I'm afraid that's just a pill you're going to have to swallow. However, this is a perfect opportunity for you to really bond with your fiance. This will not be the only difficult thing you will face together, so you might as well start now! Enjoy this time with each other!
Don't worry about wedding stuff right now, believe me, it will all go smoothly. As my friend had to tell me, if it isn't taken care of by now, it doesn't need to be. Good luck and best wishes to you and your fiance!
2007-07-01 18:45:42 · answer #2 · answered by trpaz2979 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First thing is, congrats on the wedding. Secondly, sorry to hear that your parents wont be attending the wedding. I am not married and havent been married, but I heard from lots of people that this is normal. Plus with your situation (parents not attending) it is expected that you'd be sad and/or depressed about this. Think about the positives, and take it easy on yourself. It will also help if you and your hubby to be or perhaps your maid of honor can get away from all the hectic wedding stuff and get away for a few hours..drive down to the country/get facials/whatever u do to relax and calm your nervs. and then come back and refocus on your wedding. don't worry sister. enjoy being a bride. good luck
2007-07-01 16:19:42 · answer #3 · answered by mama2be 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think all brides-to-be feel this way. I know I did. I think a part of it comes down to the fact that everything wedding is coming to an end. That alone is a big weight off of your shoulders and although thats a good thing, its also stressful. Another is probably your parents. I had a similiar situation happen to me with my aunt and uncle who were like parents to me. It did upset me a lot but just think about all of the people that are going to be there and want to help you enjoy your day and celebrate your marriage.
Good luck and chin up! You'll be okay!!
2007-07-01 17:13:15 · answer #4 · answered by Des 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think maybe you feel this way because it is finally coming to a close and in a way a weight is off your shoulders.
Relax take a breather and look forward to your special day.
I'm getting married in 6 days myself and I'm getting nervous and silly....so I can relate in a lot of ways.
I hope your family is there to support you even if they can't be at the wedding. You are lucky to have found the man you want to spend the rest of your life with.
After you are married and the whole wedding day is over you will look back and wonder what the heck was all the "blue" about.
Cheers!
2007-07-01 16:18:40 · answer #5 · answered by vnoe07 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
:( i am sorry that your parents aren't coming. i do not know the situation, that perhaps there was a fight or they can't afford to come or they are no longer with us. i think brides really want their parents there and it is hard to accept they are not coming.
are his parents coming? because now they are your family too. you will have friends and other relatives there and they want to see a happy bride. but from time to time it does get to you and you just want to scream.
i suggest a day of no wedding talk or plans. you and your friends go out to the mall or the movies and just act like it is a normal day and nothing big is coming up. with happy times in life, you are giving up something, whether it is graduation, having a baby, or getting married. take time to remember what you are giving up, then smile because it is worth what you are gaining.
HAVE A GREAT WEDDING ! :)
2007-07-01 16:24:50 · answer #6 · answered by Christina V 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wedding day jitters are normal. Right now you are asking yourself, "I am I doing the right thing?" "Will I be a good wife?" and other things along this line. The wedding planning is grueling. I had to plan mine in 2 weeks, so I didn't have much time to think about the "what ifs". If you are feeling overwhelmed, which sounds like what you are going through, talk to your mom, sis, or clergy member. If you need someone to help you plan, ASK FOR HELP. You do not have to do it all, so don't feel like you have to. Your wedding day will go as planned, with or without that special flower arrangement, or if half of the wedding cake fell over. The day isn't about this or that, it is about you and your groom to be united as one. so....... RELAX AND HAVE FUN!! :) Congrats!
2007-07-01 16:22:36 · answer #7 · answered by hazeleyedbeauty1967 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just Keep the focus on what's possible and exciting about your marriage and your upcoming life together., Your folks will lose out big time. It';s their choice. You are entitled to a happy life and of Mommy and daddy want to not cooperate with your decision, they lose you.
Make sure you relish each and every step of your marriage. You might have some fears, but if you love another, it will work out.
Later, if your parents change, go into therapy with them and have it out and say how they hurt you and do not back off making them apologize fro immaturity and for their dastardly behavior. Do NOT agree to another ceremony,. Teach them a lesson about their poor treatment of you, and warn them they best never do it again, for it will end the relationship forever.
Be very firm! Be the adult, independent of their controls.
2007-07-01 17:27:13 · answer #8 · answered by Legandivori 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes i did, i got depressed all was going well the invites were out and everything was great, but 2 nights before my wedding my finance called me and told me that he does not have a place for us to live, after the wedding, when my father was on the other end of the phone he went absoulty bizurk he yelled and screamed at my fiance and told him well no wedding then, until you get a place for you guys to live, and bang ent the phone, i cried for days, oh honey did i cry, He then, hurried and got ourselves an apartment in a hurry, And the wedding went through and i ended up being happy again,
2007-07-01 16:20:56 · answer #9 · answered by trudycaulfield 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow - that must have been a real "mental blow" to you - now that your parents won't be coming. You have every right to be blue... this is your big day and you want friends and family to be there to share it.
Is there anyway to have your parents there? I'm telling you, I've been married twice. Once when I was very young and stupid - and my parents weren't there. My marriage didn't last. Luckily they were supportive and there for my second marriage and I have been happily married for 17 years.
2007-07-01 16:19:10 · answer #10 · answered by Mom-w/teens 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋