I just ended a relationship of 7 years, we were married and have a child together. We are trying to stay friends for her, but it is tough. I tried going out on my first date since the break up (8 months after we broke up) and he got totally clingy which scared me away because I am not ready for a commitment again yet. It seems I always turn a guy into a friend because I can't find that ground to date on because I have a difficult time trusting a guy, or anyone, with my heart.
2007-07-01 07:54:22 · 4 answers · asked by Ricky 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My ex was my friend before we started dating and I feel like I have lost a good friend with our split. I don't think I could ever turn a friend into a boyfriend again, I don't think I could lose another good friend. Once I put a guy in the friend category he will not be removed, I would rather have a friend for life than a heartbreaking romance with no guarantees.
2007-07-02 02:56:35 · update #1
Trust isn't something you can turn on and off like a water faucet. Trust needs to be earned and it takes time. You've gone through a rough period of time and it's normal that you're wary of giving your heart away again. I'd suggest that you let a relationship go on for a period of time, just go with it. Don't mention "friendship" to the guy. Eventually, you'll find someone trustworthy.
2007-07-01 07:59:48 · answer #1 · answered by Elaine P...is for Poetry 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should just tell your story to your potential suitors, and explain to them that you're having trouble with this trust thing, right now. Tell them that you are going to be a 'slow date'; you may not kiss them very soon; you may be even slower ever getting to sex, and just let them pursue you if they still want to.
I'd say that a guy who pursues you very long, if you take away the prospect of sex from him, is probably really interested in you as a friend. And then maybe if you know he's a true friend, you can learn to trust him intimately?
2007-07-01 15:17:53 · answer #2 · answered by billyrayhombre09 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you are going through is normal! I have done it myself. All i can say is it does take time. One day you will just wake up and it will be different.
2007-07-01 15:00:09 · answer #3 · answered by dpine9396 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so just take time. If it isn't there, it isn't.
Good luck.
2007-07-01 15:00:32 · answer #4 · answered by A Military Veteran 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋