Am I being unreasonable to ask him to spend time with me?

Question

my bf can be such a bore. I work during the week so I mainly have time to spend with my bf during the weekend. However, I feel like I have to beg him to hang out with me at times. We live 30 mins apart and if i don't call him to hang out he will just not call all day until at night when I am ready to sleep. today, for e.g., is a beautiful day otuside and I want to do stuff outdoors. I call him and ask him if he wants to go do something since the day is so nice and he is just like go ahead without me I 'm going to cook. I know he isn't really an outdoorsy person but don't you think he can at least make the sacrifice sometimes. And even if he wants to stay home and cook how about inviting me to cook with him. I always have to suggest stuff otherwise we never do anything together and the only time we hang out together is if we watch a movie at the theater or my house. Am I being unreasonable for wanting him to make the effort to do stuff together. Do I try too hard? Help!

Answer 1

dear frnd... i can understand how it feels.. he loves u but men can be very difficult at times... try spendin times at his place when ur free... drop in n surprise him n then enjoy ur time together.. men dont really speak up wat they want but they do like bein loved n pampered so try somethin that wil change his behavior..

Answer 2

This is the way i see it: You have the right to call/msg/bother him anytime of the day or night (not being too harsh hehe) because u're his girlfriend =)

i hardly ever hang out with my bf.. cos i feel as though everytime i call him im bothering him. But thats jus me, and im about to loose it any moment now.

Anyways, you could always ask if u can join to cook with him rather than waiting for him to ask =) So actually ure not trying too hard.. u just want to spend more time with ur bf jus like every other girl.. well i hope u get him to come out of his shell more

cya! mwa

Answer 3

Why are you the one putting all the effort into maintaining the relationship?

No, it's not unreasonable to want him to spend time with you. However, he may not realize how important it is to you. Read Five Love Languages, by Gary Chapman to him or with him and talk about it. Share what your needs are, if he's unable to make a few minor changes to make the relationship work, you may have to accept that the two of you are incompatible.

Also read: Are You the One for Me? Barbara DeAngelis

Answer 4

Well you certainly have a great deal of patience!You are not unreasonable at all,but nagging won't do it,he sounds pretty passive.Try to sit down quietly with him and explain how very unhappy you are about his lack of enthusiam,(hope he's a bit more lively in the sack!).If this dosen't work,maybe you should go out and find yourself a more compatible boyfriend.

Answer 5

I think that your bf friend is just using you as s piece of A star- star if the only time he calls you is at night when he knows that you are in bed asleep

Answer 6

Dump him. He's not worth it. Get a new bf who actually calls during the day and spends time with you.

Answer 7

i've been there, done that. uhm if you know he isnt' compromising or sacrificing now that you are just dating him, he is not the one for you in the future. i dont know you, but if you know some day you want to marry, if he isnt starting off then uhm he isnt the one that is right for you. mine at least started off that way all great and married him and now im mixed up. you deserve to be with someone who is like you, i would just forget him.

Answer 8

Seems like you and he are not at all compatible and proceeding further with the relationship would be a recipe for disaster

Answer 9

I don't think he is that into you. Maybe it is time to find someone who wants to spend time with you.