Am I the only person who cares less about the favors people give out at their weddings?

Question

I am not trying to be mean because I know that people wrack their brains and spend good money on them, but I don't bother taking any home and if it's forced on me I just toss it. I would rather see a card at the table stating " In lieu of a favor, we have spent the money on blankety blank charity."Does anyone else feel or do the same thing?

Answer 1

YES! And it is presicely why that is what i have done for my upcoming wedding. It is such a waste, although some are cute, to spend $5 per favor on some ribbon and bows and candy that really no one NEEDS when you can spend the same amount on donating to a charity that will truely benefit those who do NEED something.
We have chosen the Humane Society in our state, as well as the American Diabetes Assoc & american cancer society.

I hope that this trend catchs on so that wasted favors go out the window and charity favors go in.

Also, good ideas are to have brides maids donate their dresses to inner-city organizations that provide the dresses to underprivliged teenage girls for prom. Have your invitations printed on recycled paper. There are so many great ideas...

Answer 2

While a donation to a charity is a wonderful idea - you can do wedding favors that a majority of your guests will find they can actually use after-the-fact. Some of those include seeds to plant flowers, shot glasses with the bride & grooms name engraved on them, bottle openers, food favors such as chocolatey treats or mints. I've also seen small fish bowls with betta fish. These are all practical things that could be put to use and don't leave the bride & groom feeling they've wasted money or make the guests feel coerced into taking home something they'll never use again.

Answer 3

Wow- I actually think that's a WONDERFUL idea. I agree with you! When I attend weddings, I am never overwhelmed by the favors but I know the bride/groom took time, money and energy to get them together. I appreciate their effort but I think the charity thing would be a really neat alternative. My husband and I had an Asian themed wedding so we did these small take out boxes with personalized fortune cookies as the favor. They were at least a "cool" factor that people thought were neat but in retrospect, the charity thing would've been a great idea!

Answer 4

Favors are often left behind, or tossed in a drawer and forgotten. The only reason I bothered at my wedding is because I love Jordan almonds and weddings are pretty much the only time you get them...and I figured I'd just eat any that were left over. I did. And I enjoyed them very much.

On the other hand, I'd be pretty annoyed to see 'in lieu of favors we've donated the money to (charity of our choice)'. For one thing, it's rude to donate money to a cause in someone's name unless you're very certain they personally support the charity in question. After all, no matter how innocuous, you'll always find someone who considers the charity chosen to be a scam or unpatriotic or immoral...and you're not going to please everyone. For another, it comes across to me as 'yes, we could have spent money on you, but we chose not to, so nyaah.' I know that's not the intent, but it is a real danger for the perception.

Most of all, though, it draws everyone's attention to the fact that there are no favors, which will always disappoint more people than the simple absence of favors.

Really, there's no particular reason to do favors because most people won't even notice they weren't there unless their attention is drawn to that fact. If you don't want to do favors, then save your money. Don't do them, and don't mention them. Give the donation to charity if you please, certainly, but give it in your own name and not mine. I'll choose my own charities, thank you.

Answer 5

A favor is a nice way to remember the wedding. A lot of brides spend a good deal of time making them special. The least you could do is take it with you. Do you hate chocolate and candy? Do you not have anywhere in your house to put a small candle? It sounds like you have a predisposition to hate any favor that is presented to you. A charity is a nice idea, but it doesn't give something to remember the day with.

Answer 6

if it makes you feel better we are getting married and we donated money to a friend who past away kids college fund! and instead of saying in lieu of favors we made a donation in your honor we just said we made a donation in memory so noone could be mad i made a donation in there name! Plus its a tax write off to all you people who are mad about this favor thing! So get more back on ur taxes because the bride and groom care about something. most donations are made to charities that the family has been affected by so if you do get a donation favor you shouldn't be mad because its there day and not your day to get a gift you dont even want!

Answer 7

The only favors I have from all the weddings I've been to are the two that gave out christmas ornaments. I hang the ornaments every year on my tree. The rest of them, I couldn't even tell you what they were. Heck, I don't even have a favor from my own wedding. Of course my favors were just two hershey kisses wrapped in burgundy tulle tied with silver curling ribbon. I hope people ate them and didn't save them.

Answer 8

I doubt I'd notice if I attended a wedding and didn't get a favor, so I'm with you on that perspective. I tend to agree with the previous posters who weren't comfortable with the charity card. If you don't give a favor, don't advertise that fact.

Answer 9

They give favors because it's traditional to do so, and it's part of making their plans complete. I'm not being mean either, but do you really think they care whether or not their guests enjoyed the favors? They just got married, I think they've got more important things on their mind. And flowers, table cloths, center pieces, etc...those aren't necessary either, but it's still a common practice.

I'm sure you'd plan your wedding the way you prefer, so it's kind of unfair to criticize anyone else's planning preferences.

Answer 10

I know what you mean about the favors. The last wedding I went to had a CD with love songs on it. It was really nice. A friend of mine had an ice cream scooper with almonds in with it. My neice did candles. I always find them to be interesting and fun.