My daughter is 18 and pregnant. She just finished high school, works a full time job and is enrolled in collage in the fall. I would like to give her a baby shower but unsure if it would be appropriate to hold it in our church hall like I had planned. I didn't think much about it until I was told by several of my husband's family members that it would be wrong (because shes not married) and they would not attend. Any thoughts?
2007-07-01 05:01:14 · 11 answers · asked by emy 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Do it!
There is nothing wrong, my mother had a baby
shower in a church, it doesn't matter if she is
not married, because in the name of lord
Jesus Christ, God was not married to
Mary and the Church respects all
in the name of the lord himself.
If it is nice for the baby, then
they don't care. I don't
know which country
you are in or not
or if it is illegal.
Congratulations Grandma and Regards!
2007-07-01 05:50:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I could understand people thinking it may be a bit weird to hold the shower at the church. But, to say to you that they would not attend seems very mean spirited. I personally would have a difficult time inviting anyone who said such things. I too was a single mom and the last thing I needed was negative people and energy around me. A baby is a blessing and deserves to be celebrated. Have the shower at your home, or find a restaurant or hall. Invite those who love your daughter and will support her. It takes a village to raise a child. You should be selective in who you chose to celebrate with.
2007-07-01 05:13:19 · answer #2 · answered by Erinn 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If it is already causing a problem with your husband's family members (which are her family too) then it might cause a problem with whomever you choose to invite.
It is kinda weird if you go to one of those churches that state, "no sex before marriage." It is kind of like a slap in the face of the church's teachings. Like, I wouldn't hold a pork BBQ blowout at a synagogue.
Is it okay? Well, if the church is taking your money to reserve the hall then it is okay with them. Is it a good idea? Probably not.
2007-07-01 05:12:03 · answer #3 · answered by dice 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I would have it someplace else. I personally don't think it is distasteful, BUT I know how A LOT of the older people would say & think.
They will say things like... just flaunting it in our faces,
or, they don't think there is anything wrong w/ being unwed & preg... look they are proud of her!
She will need their support and prayers now more than ever.
Just to save the comments,
have it someplace else.
I am not a fuddy duddy, but i go to Church w/ a lot of them!
Congrats on the new BABY!!! Sounds like your daughter has a plan!!
2007-07-01 05:18:49 · answer #4 · answered by shihtzugirl 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Regardless of your daughter's age or marital status, the bigger issue is that it's inappropriate for a family member to hold a shower for a mother-to-be or a bride. Showers should always be given by someone unrelated.
2007-07-01 17:00:01 · answer #5 · answered by CantTellYouMyName 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋
She having a child of a wedlock. I don't think it's forbidden but it will not sit well with the priest. To avoid the embarrassment rent a catering hall.
2007-07-01 05:14:39 · answer #6 · answered by Rafa 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋
I agree with Parrot eyes. Have it at home or even at a park. That way, it won't conflict with anyones beliefs.
I was 19 and not married when I had my daughter and she was 19 and not married when she gave me my granddaughter. (she has since married and divorced and they are living with me). I hope you enjoy your grandchild as much as I enjoy mine! :-)
2007-07-01 05:12:25 · answer #7 · answered by Milkaholic 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
It's easy enough to have it somewhere else and just circumvent the whole argument. Have it at your house -- then if anyone says it's "not right" you can boot them out the door. ;)
Congratulations on your grandbaby and good luck to all of you!
2007-07-01 05:06:13 · answer #8 · answered by Parrot Eyes 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
It had better be. Or find yourself a new church.
2007-07-04 21:11:42 · answer #9 · answered by johny0802 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would avoid the whole unwed mother crap and just hold it somewhere else. talk to her friends about where to hold it.
2007-07-01 05:10:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋