Boyfriend doesnt kiss??

Question

I'm dating a guy who is to me amazing, except he wants his first kiss to be with his wife, along with everything else, i understand everything but the kissing thing i'm having trouble with, weve been together for about 3 months now, and he has kissed me on the cheek once, that is it, i really like him and i guess i'm willing to deal with it, but t does bother me, and eventually i'm sure will bother me even more, i dont know what to do. he is very religious, but it doesnt say in the bible anywhere that kissing out of wedlock is bad..... its his own thing i guess?? what can i do ......i'm 20 he is 23... I really do respect him on this, not many guys can do what he is doing, but at the same time it still bugs me a little bit, should i talk to him about it, let it go.... i dont know, its just weird because when were together at times where normally people would kiss, its like akward and i have to turn away because i want to kiss him, he says he has wanted to kiss me, but it all goes back

to he wants to save it. we never talked a whole lot on it, because i dont know what to say on hte subject really, its really different for me

Answer 1

Good grief people. That doesn't mean he's gay! It simply means he is capable of exercising self-control - a trait which many of us are sorely lacking.

It sounds like your boyfriend feels like kissing is an intimate expression, and he wants all those intimate expressions to be reserved only for the woman he will spend the rest of his life with. I think that's admirable! Plus, he probably realizes that kissing (once it becomes intense) can quickly escalate to other things, and he wants to avoid that potential temptation.

I would respect him and not try to change his mind about this. Imagine if you were his future wife, wouldn't you respect him for honoring you by wanting to save all his "firsts" for you? He would definitely be a husband you could trust, a husband who has strength of character, and a husband who would cherish you with all of his heart. Also, consider... if you disrespect his wishes and try to change his mind or tempt him, what might he think of a woman who would try to rob him of a gift he's been saving all these years for his future wife (who may/may not be you)?

There's more to a lasting and satisfying relationship than just the physical (there's emotional intimacy, for one). Try to focus on these other aspects for now. After all, trust, respect, and friendship are the foundations for a successful marriage.

Answer 2

Premarital chastity can strengthen the respect and love between two sweethearts that lead to the full expression of both personalities within the marriage. . . . Saving sex for marriage gives you something very special to share with one another, which no one else can have. As for kissing, well, anyone can say, ‘we know when to stop.’ True, a person may know when, but how many can do it? It is better to avoid the situation. True, not every couple end up having sexual relations; some let their displays of affection stop just short of it. But what results when one is worked up emotionally and has no honorable outlet for such feelings? Guaranteed frustration. And those frustrations are not limited to sexual feelings
How can you get better acquainted with a person and still keep chaste? The Bible warns: “The heart is trickier than anything and in a desperate state; who understands it?” (Jeremiah 17:9) So, from the start, let your partner know your attitude regarding limits on expressions of affection, set limits, avoid tempting situations, say no and mean it. This is what your boyfriend has done. What an admirable quality today. You ought to respect it and not try to make him break that detemination. IF he is the one for you, time will tell. Give him that time or you may ruin his conscience with God.

Answer 3

As a matter of fact... all sexual intimacy prior to marraige is wrong..read the song of solomans.... its so sad that people on this forum are calling him gay.. you you're self said he is an amazing boyfriend....he is mature enough to understand that kissing leads to other things.... I wish i had his resolve,,,,in todays world there are very few like him that is why people are quick to point fingers, what he is doing is waiting until he can kiss you and it can be pure without guilt and without commiting a sin... however if this is more important to you than the long run i do suggest you break it off so that he can be with someone who respects his stance and you can be with someone who likes to kiss...

listen honey we all like to kiss... but he is one of the rare few who can be strong enough in the Lord to control his feelings and urges,,,, what is a kiss after all a asexual expression of love right? why do you NEED a sexual expression when you have love in its purest form ..he loves you...and he doesnt even want your body.... he is a keeper... but DONT deny you doubts either....remember What Would Jesus Do

Answer 4

See when you love somebody then there must be lots of expectation and dreams you have with your partner. Your patrner is religious its a good thing but the probihibitions which he is carrying along with his religion its too bad. You try to make him convince that kiss has nothing to do with religion. You also have some mental and sexual need for him. And if he behave like a "BRAHAMCHARI' your relation will not work out. To carry any relationship to satify mental and sexual need is very neccesary i m not talking about sex part before marraige but right now i m talking about love making ideas. If today he is hesitating to kiss you after your marraige he may hesitate to have sex with you. Talk to him nicely if he will not convince then think twice about carrying this relationship anymore. All the best.

Answer 5

If you can't stand it, it'll only cause pain. If you can, then stay with him. You have a right to be happy just as much as him. There's obviously a clash in ideals here. I'm not exactly sure if he can be shaken from his viewpoints, though.

His way could be good from an objective viewpoint, but from your viewpoint it must suck. I say do as YOU feel, for this is your life. You have a right to not be with him because he won't kiss you. I know of no such passage in the Bible that prohibits kissing out of wedlock, provided the kiss is not full of lust.

Answer 6

Aha this is very interesting.He is a very Loving person but after marriage.Go ahead and marry that man,Then he must gave you alote of fun.

Answer 7

i give him props. you know fosho hes gonna be loyal. i guess the only thing u can do is not get what you want. he loves you and the kisses on the cheeks arnt bad. just tell him to be more active with you because you think hes bored of you

Answer 8

The 'saving it until marriage' thing is a form of mental illness.

If this comes from his religiousity, he's only going to get more nutty after you get married, not less nutty.

The sooner you ditch this kook, the sooner you can get over him and move on to a more mentally stable life-partner.

Good luck.
:-)

Answer 9

Just respect the guy. If you can't, date someone else. He wants to save the kiss for his first wife. That's his preference. Don't force him to kiss you, please.

Answer 10

it does seem very odd tell him you will have to break up as you can not wait for a kiss untill you are married.