to all the parents ( with money) or whatever doesn't really matter to me... JUST HELP!!!?

Question

okay first off I am 18 years old ... female... and my parents are divorced....... I REALLY NEED SOME HELP.I am a good kid... I have been working scene I was 15... okay this is kind of long.... and I am going to try my best to explain everything
my parents have money... ALOT, but i dunno if they worked for it or they were given it by my grandparents ....
my mom and dad DO NOT GET ALONG.. they both bad mouth each other to me, but every time i mess up they gang up on me... my father was told me things like " my mother is obessed with money and big d****" and my mother will tell my that my father is crazy and needs help!!! my dad lives in a gated community... has a new family.. n ever now and then he wants to talk to me.. i have an older brother who went to private school.. star football player...he is my family's pride n joy!! but then he got caught sellin drugs n is in jail.. buy my dad said he is more of a man then he will ever be because he is sitting in jail for his friend

okay the rest of the story....

i don't want to hear my dad say he is going to beat the **** out of me.

i'm thinking about leaving n doing everything on my own
i tried to talk to my mom n she told me if i want another mom then i need to go find her.. and she is going to **** who ever she wants to ****

i feel like a bad person because i chose not to live my life shoved up money like that

my best friend lives in a trailor.. n they look down on that

what do u think:? should i stay... or go


is the average family like this?
or is my family messed up!!!

thanks

Answer 1

Ok that's a pretty sad story, though I imagine not that uncommon, except in the details.

Your question?

I suppose your parents are all concerned about their own lives and about your brother, and never give you a second thought. They could help you out big time right now, but you don't know how to ask and they would just shout at you and dump on you if you did.

Am I close?

Answer 2

Well sweetie...it sounds like your family has some issues...but that is OK, because most do. I do not know exactly what your question is but I will tell you what I think anyway...I think you need to sit Mommy and Daddy down, separately and tell them that you simply cannot accept them bad mouthing each other. If they want to complain they should see a counselor, friend, or something like that! I would tell them that you love them both and will not tolerate the smack talk anymore. While you are at it I would ask them why they think you feel like the black sheep when your bro is the one in a jail cell. Maybe there is something in your character that you need to evaluate and change so that you will be more respected by your family and others...but the real reason for asking them this question is to help them realize that you do not feel the unconditional love that you see them giving to your brother.

I want you to remember this! Just because your family is dysfunctional does not mean you have to be. My family is a bunch of loons and I survived. I made my share of mistakes, but I am responsible and strong and my family sees that now. I have become the normal one.

Seek God because his love never fails and is unconditional!

Answer 3

Your family sounds really mixed up! They have their good points and their bad points, obviously.
It's really not helpful for them to badmouth each other in front of you; sounds like they get kind of crude about it. Tell them you don't want to hear that!
Your dad thinks it is good that your brother is in jail for something his friend did? That's not good. He shouldn't be protecting a criminal from the law. He should be trying to become a law-abiding citizen so he can have a better life when he gets out.
I think you are fortunate that you have been working since you were 15. You have been learning responsibility and self-reliance. You have been learning the value of working for what you want. This will help you in the years ahead.
Don't think too much about your parents' money. If they offer to help you through college, fine. If not, fine. Whatever you accomplish in life, you will appreciate it more because you earned it.
Keep on good terms with your parents if you can, but try to learn to live better than they do. Work on forming healthy relationships and not saying evil things about other people. I really think you don't badmouth others much, by the way you describe your family. Yes you are troubled by their faults, but you don't sound really bitter. I hope I'm right.

Answer 4

It is difficult to be the sibling of a star athlete, honor student, and the families "pride and joy". When you add divorced parents, money, drugs, being eighteen, and jail you have every reason to be asking for help. I hope that you have a trust- worthy professionally trained counselor. You deserve that. If your parents will not provide that for you then find one yourself. There are many available on a sliding fee basis depending on your income. Spending the time and money for counseling now will give you the support you need for building or rebuilding your life. I wish you the best and the happiest future...

Answer 5

you're 18, so , are you in college? It doesn't matter how your parents got their money, you have to concentrate on taking care of yourself. Don't concern yourself with what they give your brother, that will only make you more miserable and it doesn't do you any good . sounds like your parents need to see a councelor and you too. Why don't you suggest family therapy for all , if they don't like this then you see if you can do it somehow. But remem ber you don't have to beat yourself over what is going on in your family. Take yoga classes and meditate, this will help you find your inner strength. We all have this. Good luck

Answer 6

And your needed advice is ?

Answer 7

What is the question?

Answer 8

What do you want to know ?

Answer 9

What do you need help with? You want money? For what? Please explain.