me and my boyfriend have been going out for 5 months i introduced him to my parents 4 months ago they say they don't approve of him...my boyfriend is very respectfull to me and my parents......they say that he is a bad influence because we had sex and he dresses like a " thug " i understand about the sex thing but it wasn't just his idea it was mine too and he didn't pressure me into it..it just happened one day...he treats me good and has never hurt me in anyway.............how can i convine my parents that he is a good guy???? i tried but it just seems like they don't want to hear it.... what do i do???
2007-06-21 15:44:27 · 16 answers · asked by ghettoprincesss 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well your guy needs to change his ways to prove to your parents he is serious, he respects you and he is sorry for any actions he has done to make them feel bad about him. HE needs to make an effort to try hard to be what they want him to be. A cautious, trustable kids that will protect you and shelter you from harm. The sex showed them that he and you are willing to do silly things together not be a responsible couple. Your parents are trying to protect you from mistakes that can ruin or really hurt your life. Pregnancy, AIDS, warts, anything is possible - when you are playing with fire. Your parents have raised you from a child that could not walk , eat or talk and gave your a home. They need your respect and you should give that to them. You have talents to use and getting this serious this young will not necessarily allow you to use these talents to the fullest. You are too young to be a mother - a house wife, and you do not want to get a fast food job so that you can be home for your boyfriend and kid - or boyfriend that is a "player" and his best job is working at some McDonalds or cleaning a factory.
2007-06-21 15:52:15 · answer #1 · answered by Kerry Z 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you realize the situation in which you have put this young man? You are both underage. If you truly care for him, you will not let your hormones rule your actions.
Your parents are right. It has nothing to do with him. Simply, you and he are far too young. The fact that you already had sex is proof of your immaturity, lack of planning (did you use protection?), and lack of good judgement. If you became pregnant, how would you and he support the child? Would you dump that problem on your parents? If you want to play at being adults, then you have to take the burden and the responsibility of adult consequences, and you are not ready for that yet.
This is how it is done: first you get an education (that means finish high school and get a college degree), then you get a well-paying job (due to the education), then you buy property, then you get married, and then and ONLY after all these other criteria have been met do you even think about having kids. To do it in any other order is to shortchange the children. Even the birds of the air know to make the nest BEFORE you lay the eggs! But of course you weren't thinking of that; all you were thinking of was your hormones. Adults HAVE to think of all the other things; that's part of being mature and having adult responsibilities. You and he have to finish your education first so that you are prepared for life. You haven't even begun to live yet and have YEARS yet to go. You are babies, and if you aren't careful you will be "babies having babies." Your parents are trying to ensure that neither of you wrecks your future. You do realize that sex with a minor is statutory rape and a criminal offense, don't you?! Again, you proabably weren't thinking ahead.
There's a lot more to consider than just "liking" your boyfriend. There isn't enough space or time to go into it all and you are a child so it probably wouldn't mean much. Sufficient to say your parents are right. Stop the nonsense.
2007-06-21 16:24:48 · answer #2 · answered by D 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depending on what state you live in, a 16 year old having sex with a 14 year old may be a crime for which he could be arrested.
He is 2 years older than you and he should have known better, even if you didn't. Even if you had begged him to have sex, he should have known better. 2 years is a big age difference at your time of life. Imagine if it was the other way; you were going with a 12 year old. Why would you do that? You would probably do it because it would be easy to get him to do what you want. That is what I think about your boyfriend.
In any case, your parents are responsible for you until you are 18. Until that time, you have to do what they say, unless they tell you to break the law. If they disapprove, but don't do anything to stop you going with him, maybe they don't really care about you.
2007-06-21 16:22:40 · answer #3 · answered by The First Dragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your parents love you and want the best for you. I was a teen once with a situation similar to yours. I know that right now 5 months seems like a long time to be together, but trust me its not. Listen to your parents, I know that isnt what you want to hear, but it is true. They know you and love you more than your boyfriend and they will be there when he runs off with another girl. I am not saying break up with this guy if your parents arent asking you to, but take it a little slower, if your relationship works out great, your parents were wrong, but trust their intuition as parents, you will usually find it is right!
2007-06-21 15:50:51 · answer #4 · answered by psalms912b 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't date until you are 16. Do not have sex, you are too young of a child. Date guys that do not dress like thugs. There ya go. A mom's opinion. Take out the trash. That helps ANY situation.
2007-06-21 15:49:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Age difference here is not the problem. The sex thing is. Your parents have every right not to want you with him bc of that. I'm sorry, I'm almost 16 so don't think that I'm someone elses' mother preaching at you. But really. You are too young to even think about having sex.
2007-06-21 15:59:27 · answer #6 · answered by Brittany2010 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
u go gurl an older guy LOL j/k.well ur parents r worried about ur safety ur parents no u r a good kid but they probably just afraid that u might get pregnant n they dont wanna c dat happen 2 dey lil gurl datz growin up so fast .ur parents r not ready for everything that is going on rite now u probably just need 2 sit down wit dem n explain 2 them how u feel but dont put 2 much on them they cant handle cause they might do sumthing that will make u unable 2 c him n wit u not being able 2 c him u might just run away r get pregnant n dat is wat they r afraid of so just explain 2 them n a respectful way n i wish d best for u n ur bf
2007-06-21 16:46:35 · answer #7 · answered by www.armydiva221 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all, you shouldn'r be having sex when you are that young!!!!!!!!!! I think you should just leave your parents alone because its like "when r they gunna c him??." I agree with the age difference because I like a guy that is 8 years older than me and I LOVE HIM but he barley notices me. He knows me, though. Just take your relationship slow. NEVER HAVE SEX AGAIN!!!! If your school sees that..you can get suspended. TRUST ME!!!!!! GOOD LUCK
2007-06-21 15:50:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the sex thing at 14 will never be approved by a parent .stop trying.
2007-06-21 15:48:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
point 1: you're parents will never approve of anyone, not even Prince William. ignore them.
point 2: even though you shouldn't be having sex at 14, it does give them the right to be concerned. be thankful you have loving parents.
point 3: sounds to me like you love him, or like him a WHOLE lot, be happy and don't let your parents make you stressed.
2007-06-21 16:07:22 · answer #10 · answered by hotchica90210 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋