im 23 hes 44. he is seperated for 8 years has 3 kids under 20yrs. weve lived together for 2 years and i have often brought up the subject of marriage but he quickly shrugs it off and then says 'when the time is right' but when is the 'right' time? i adore him but sometimes i think i love him more than he loves me
2007-06-21 11:56:02 · 14 answers · asked by samsond 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
after two years the time should be right. he probably is not looking for that kind of commitment. Talk to him about it.
2007-06-21 11:59:36 · answer #1 · answered by ambrosius15 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
24 years age difference? Well, that wouldn't be so bad if he didn't have so much of a past. (Some people might refer to it as baggage) I cannot say that about children. But he does come with a ready made family. I would say no that he has no intentions to marry. He obviously has his cake, and is eating it to. This is common sense. You're 24 he's 44. What man would not ride this wave for all its worth. You know what they say. Let him free. If he loves you, he will come back. You could always suggest a "shut up" ring. If he is unwilling to at least commit to that, then you should be the one running to free yourself. You are soo young, and have so many opportunities if you don't limit yourself to this relationship. You are obviously looking for a future. Time to move on. Sorry, but I was in your position for a looooooong time. I finally got the shut up ring, but he would commit to no definite plans. I finally planned the wedding, and told him the date and to show up or get out! We have been happily married now for 5 years. Together for 17!! Don't make my mistake and wait that long!! Knowing what I know now, I would have put up with it for 4 Years TOPS!! Why don't you try confronting him and asking him to specify what has to happen for the time to be right. He'll either give you corny answers, or trip over his own words!! Good luck. Hopefully you won't let him take advantage of you.
2007-06-21 12:14:00 · answer #2 · answered by lulu 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
is he's been separated for 8 years there's no reason why he has not got a divorce, you can get one after 5 years even if the X objects
To be honest I don't think he wants to marry again
if you are living together and you are happy what difference does a piece of paper make and an expensive day out (the wedding)
2007-06-21 12:09:45 · answer #3 · answered by Diamond 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why the big rush to get married, your still a young girl with a big wide world just waiting to be explored.
I have been with my partner for 10 years and were not married and it's not a bone of contention between us.
If he's been married before and it didn't work out for what ever reason, he's probably just being cautious, once bitten twice shy!?
Dont put pressure on him, if and when he's ready to give mariage another go he will.
2007-06-21 12:15:10 · answer #4 · answered by The Original Highbury Gal 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are close to his daughter's age. He has seen the world, you have seen nothing.
He will not marry you cuz he knows the marriage will not work.
You can stay with him and be a sex toy all you want but it is just waste of your time and pleasuer for him.
I wish I had something better to tell you.
Good Luck.
2007-06-21 12:25:57 · answer #5 · answered by feysunny 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
im 44 & he's 41.we've been 2gether 4 5years &have a 4year old...but none of us mentions the word marriage!we are both divorced from previous marriages,& we are both adults to know that a piece of paper wont make any difference to what we feel for eachother!
2007-06-21 12:58:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think he's scared of making a commitment as he's been hurt once already
get him to support you with the kids
as you are so much younger than him they see you as a little older than them which is causing resentment
2007-06-25 01:47:26 · answer #7 · answered by ~*tigger*~ ** 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what he has to do is get divorced first of all.
Alot of people who have been married before, do not want to do it again, which is understandable.
2007-06-23 03:39:07 · answer #8 · answered by Rebz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
2 years still not that long ,try again next year
2007-06-21 12:01:19 · answer #9 · answered by jinx 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This relationship isn't going anywhere.
2007-06-21 12:01:47 · answer #10 · answered by Poppet 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋