My boyfriend and i have been dating for almost 5 moths. The first couple of months we weren't that clse because we were occupied with school and work but things started picking up around our 3rd month. We were drunk one night and we were messing around and he told me he loved me. i have trust issues because of my past and i would like to know if this was an okay way for him to tell me that.
2007-06-21 10:58:16 · 14 answers · asked by Puffin 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well,
From my experience, and from what I have heard, when
a person is under the influence of alcohol, their defenses
are down, and the "real" person comes out.
So, I would say what your boyfriend told you is the truth.
You didn't say how you felt about him. I would just say from a old timer, take it slow, above all, listen to your instincts.
The fact that it bothered you when he was drunk, is a warning sign.
Good Luck
2007-06-21 11:02:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes when you are drunk you are able to say things that you normally don't have the courage to say.
As for knowing if this was an okay way of sharing his feelings that is something that you must answer for your self. Under ideal circumstances a person would declare his feeling for you with out the aid of alcohol however, would you also accept him saying it so soon into the relationship considering your "trust issues".
Being someone that has been in hurt in the past puts you in a situation in which you guard your heart. Sometimes you look at reasons to not believe that others care for you and have feelings for you. Try to trust, take baby steps... perhaps the next time he declares his feelings he will not need a drink and he will not have the fear of you not believing him or feeling the same way.
2007-06-21 18:07:59 · answer #2 · answered by igrwup 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not many guys would go so far as to say love consider your self lucky. all though it would probably be best if you did not get to close because he might decide something El's latter on in the relation ship. But you should be a little more relaxed he could have been so drunk that he just let it slip. if i were you i would ask him if he remembers that night and what he said if he blushes and says yes then hes worth sticking around a little longer if he says no keep it a secret and continue on the way things were.
2007-06-21 18:08:07 · answer #3 · answered by Kirsten T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he can only tell you when he is drunk then its the alcohol talking.
If he can only tell you when he wants something then he isnt talking to you, but to what he desires.
Be real, but dont be stupid.
Getting drunk, and being alone is a great way to become a victim of date-rape. Do you know how to perform what is called a "rape-kit" on yourself, the way to preserve evidence so at a later date you can prove it happened, and have an opportunity to press charges. If you cant do that, AND you are being risky, you are just a victim waiting to happen. If you dont want to learn how to "kit" yourself, then learn how to be safe. Alcohol can make mild mannered clark kents into ragin lex luthors you never expected.
2007-06-21 18:04:17 · answer #4 · answered by Curly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Theres that saying that a drunk mind speaks a sober heart. While that may be true don't trust that too much, if he says it a couple more times under different conditions then I would let your guard down a little but not completly. You never know what guys are capable of doing.
2007-06-21 18:00:47 · answer #5 · answered by Shorty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think alot of girls have trust issues. we all been through the trust part before. we always get heartbroken when we trust that one person right? yeah old relationships always are dealt with trust issues and new relationships are dealt with it as well. it is definitely ok to tell him that. Not only he will understand, but he will also won't pressure you to do anything. Love takes time and True Love Waits. If he gets mad because you are not ready to say i love you back at him, then you need to tell him he needs to be patient or go find someone who loves to get her heart broken. And i am 150% sure you do not want to get your heart broken at all. Don't worry, we ladies go through this alot but just keep your focus on your heart and make good choices no matter who its effecting. You are you and no one can make your decisions but you.
2007-06-21 18:03:13 · answer #6 · answered by Katherine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot of guys need a little "liquid courage" to be able to tell you how they feel for the first time. But, I would wait until he says it to you sober to take it to heart. Because of your past, I understand you being protective of yourself and you should be. So, enjoy spending time together and getting to know each other and wait for him to tell you sober. That way you can be sure it wasn't the alcohol talking. There's no need to rush, just have fun. Good luck!
2007-06-21 18:09:03 · answer #7 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. If he was drunk or under the influence of any substance, it doesn't count. It also doesn't count if he says it during sex.
Don't take this as he doesn't love you, but I would wait to make sure he's completely coherent when it says it before putting too much faith in it.
2007-06-21 18:01:25 · answer #8 · answered by xK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone's in love when they're drunk. Some guys say "I love you" to get a girl naked, and it works, especially when combined with alcohol.
2007-06-21 18:00:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't drink. You are headed for problems worse than anything you can imagine if you are an underage drinker. He probably doesn't even remember what he said.
2007-06-21 18:00:46 · answer #10 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋