Our family (me hubby and kids,3) was invited to a backyard wedding 4 a friend of my hubby, it's his 2nd. We origionally were not going 2 bring the kids but when we got the invitation it listed the kids names as well, so I RSVP'd for 5. When I asked my husband if my stepdaughter was going 2 be with us, he said "no, but your younger (13yrs old) brother is" it will still be 5 people so, no big deal. My DH called groom 2 give a courtesy call 2 let them know about the change & groom said "NO, Sorry! bro can't come!". We thought he was kidding but he repeated "No" again, DH told him that we have a problem w/leaving my bro home alone while we are out with the kids all night, &they said they would get back 2 us 2 let us know if he could come. Well I think that they r RUDE! what's the diff, it's still 5 people. Our gifts 2 them have ALWAYS reflected nicely. There R going 2 be kids there & they INVITED THE KIDS IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!! I am offended & don't want to go, should we go? R they RUDE?
2007-06-20 17:02:12 · 16 answers · asked by rxing 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
brother is from out of state, he visits every summer, he is like part of my immediate family when he is here and isn't just a brother, who i'm inviting because I want.
2007-06-21 06:03:26 · update #1
cut them a bit of slack. they are probably stressed out like crazy and going around the bend in preparatin. Just wait and see what he says. Its their day after all. They can do whatever they want, and rightly so. You should respect their wishes and be there to celebrate their wedding!!
2007-06-21 00:02:11 · answer #1 · answered by Click 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think they're being rude at all. My brother is inviting families to his wedding and if they can't all attend, he'll be using the extra seat(s) for guests he was unable to invite due to a numbers restriction. If they invite someone else (especially someone he may not know) in the place of one of their family members, this means that one person my brother wants to go to his wedding is unable to attend.
It's perfectly reasonable that your brother not be invited to the wedding - sorry! He's 13 - is he not able to stay home alone for an evening? Can he go to a friend's house for the night instead? I'm sure you can find other arrangements for him.
2007-06-21 12:59:20 · answer #2 · answered by tink 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Was it made clear to the groom that one kid was out and another was in to keep the count at 5? He may have misunderstood and thought he was in addition to the five. If after making sure he understood that your total tally was 5 he still says no then he IS rude and I'd stay home with my brother. If they have a problem with that, just tell them that your concern is that your brother will be home alone and you won't leave him by himself.
2007-06-21 00:44:40 · answer #3 · answered by foodieNY 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
No, they are not rude. Weddings cost so much money - maybe they're already stretching by allowing all the kids to come? So cutting back on one person could save a lot- I know that money shouldn't be the issue, but for some people, it really is! People spend more on weddings than they really can afford... Also, if other guests have been asking to being un-invited guests, and they allow one guest to do so, the other guests that asked are going to be soooo angry. It's only fair.
2007-06-21 00:07:29 · answer #4 · answered by Hmm? 2 · 4⤊ 2⤋
I would not attend the wedding at all now. If you respond to a wedding invite that has "&guest" and you change what guest you were bringing that is not rude. These people have some nerve. You responded for 5 and they are getting 5. Plus it is in their backyard for petes sake. Just tell them that your plans have changed and you are no longer able to attend. Sorry for the inconvience. I might also send them a small, inexpensive, yet thoughtful gift. Maybe a photo frame or something.
2007-06-21 00:21:48 · answer #5 · answered by JM 6 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Wait, so you have 3 kids. This includes your step daughter; however, she can not go. So instead, you invite your brother. Well, I'm sorry but your brother and your kids are two different things. The invite said, Mr and Mrs. Whatever and Family (meaning children) NOT and brother.
So, no he was not rude. You were being inconsiderate. It doesn't matter if the number is the same or not. You invited and RSVPed for someone who was not invited in the first place.
2007-06-21 00:10:43 · answer #6 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 5⤊ 2⤋
What the? Sounds like the weird people I have to deal with all the time. I mean, you responded 5, and 5 are coming, what is his problem?
And as far as people whining, sorry, we have to cut back on wedding participants due to lack of money, makes me laugh, because the more people that come, the more money they wind up in the long run since they will get more money in the envelopes.... and it will cover more of the expenses.
What really makes me laugh is this is a stupid backyard wedding so would it REALLY matter if 1 less person came?
It sounds to me like they've started drinking before they wedding even started.
I you like them I would just go you and hubby. If you don't like them, bring everyone and give in envelope like just you and hubby came.
What rude jerks they are!
2007-06-21 00:14:51 · answer #7 · answered by Genie♥Angel 5 · 3⤊ 3⤋
Are they rude because you did not get the answer you wanted to hear? It's their wedding and they wanted your children not the brother of a friend. It's their wedding and they call the shots and it's your decision on weather or not you want to remain friends. this could break the friendship apart if you hold strong and not go.
2007-06-21 00:08:56 · answer #8 · answered by Jenn 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
here's a short and sweet answer for you. Do not attend the wedding and call to give them the reason. I think his response was very rude. It's the same amount of peeps! With the money you save on the gift, have a family Pizza Party at home!!!!....enjoy it!! ;)
2007-06-21 00:23:28 · answer #9 · answered by djjoecruz 5 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Very rude!! Call them back and tell them you made different plans that include your brother and cannot come to their wedding..I bet they call back and change their minds. I still wouldn't go,just to prove a point.
2007-06-21 00:16:41 · answer #10 · answered by § dreamer § 7 · 2⤊ 3⤋