What am I to do? I'm only 16 and still in school.?

Question

I'm 8 months pregnant and just found out when I turned 7 months. THe father of my baby aint claiming it and I can't do this by myself. I don't think its fair if I raise a child by myself but I didn't lay down by myself. I feel so stupid and I KNOW I'VE MADE A BIG MISTAKE BUT TO ME THIS BABY IS A BLESSING. Can somebody help me I don't know what to do.

My family and friends are very supportive. I'm start school with everyone else on August 20. The father of my child is 19 now. I have a baby sitter for when school starts back. I'm not giving my child up for adoption she will grow up with her birth mother.

Answer 1

I'm sorry sweetie, I know how you feel alone and helpless right now. I am 21 and becoming a single mother. It isn't fair but you have to realize how strong you actually are. You now have another life depending on you for strength! You really need to be around friends and family who are supportive of you and who will help you through this time in your life. Surround yourself w/ people who do care. You have to think of the well being of you and your unborn...especially since you are so far along in your pregnancy.

You are right, a baby is a blessing and I am so glad you see that. I battle with myself every day because I feel so alone and lost at times.....but then I think about my unborn daughter who will soon enough be in my arms and I tell myself, it's no longer about me anymore...it's all for my child. Your baby's father is missing out on something amazing...don't allow him to ruin this experience for you no matter how young you are.

Having a baby young is going to be hard but like I keep telling myself...IT'S NOT IMPOSSIBLE...nothing is! You can still accomplish all you need to...finish school, do what you have to do for YOU and YOUR BABY! Trust me, you are stronger than u realize.

Every day...I place my hands on my stomach and I tell my little girl...mommy will not let you down. It gives me motivation and the strength to make it through the day....

Good luck...if you need someone to talk to..I'm here...seriously! =]

Answer 2

You have to do what you think is in the best interest of the baby. And your education needs to take priority too. If you know that you can't take care of him/her and have no other supports, you should give the baby up for adoption. It will be hard, but you will be giving your baby it's best possible shot in life. And some adoptions agencies let you have a hand in choosing the couple that will receive your baby. Sometimes it can be a bit easier knowing that your child is going to have a loving home. However, if you have a wonderful support system, you should keep the baby. It could be one of the most wonderful things that can happen. I will not lie, raising a baby alone is HARD and I have help from my mother. It can be isolating and it is the END of your social life. It is a 24 hour job that goes until the end of your life. And it is exhausting especially in the beginning. A person just wasn't meant to function on 4 hours sleep a night. Do some soul searching and only commit if you feel that you are truly ready. Your life will NEVER be the same again.

Answer 3

I'm guessing you're period is really irregular if you just found out, but that is besides the point. My advice to you, is to decide if you can handle it. Do you have a support system? I.E. someone to watch the baby while you finish school? help with the financial support? If the answer is no, then you might want to think about adoption and get on the phone with someone at a Family Planning resource agency. Whatever you decision, you have to look out for you're well being as well as the baby's. If you know you cannot financially support the baby, and you wouldn't be able to finish school you are probably looking at a lifetime of hardship? Is that best? Or should you give the baby up for adoption to a family that is trying to have a baby, and can financially support the baby. You can also do a private adoption and get some financial assistance with college or whatever you need. These are just a few suggestions.

Answer 4

when the baby is born have the courts do a DNA test for the father. He will then have proof that the child is his and even if he is not in the child's life, he will have to pay you support to take care of the child. You may not want to do this but trust me any help is better than nothing. Raising a child is not easy and it takes alot of work. I promise you that the joy in raise a child is more than anything else you will ever experience. You need to do what is best for both you and the child, you are very young and still need to finish your education if your parents are not there for you then you might want to think of adoption so you can finish growing up and the baby will be placed in a home that can take great care of the child. there are options you need to do what is best for both you and the baby. Good luck in your choice

Answer 5

Stay in school and get your education. You'll need it whether you are pregnant or not. Yes, you made a mistake but don't make a bigger mistake by not getting an education. It may not be easy but you can do it.

You don't have to do this by yourself. Are you getting government help now like WIC or food stamps? If you are when that baby is born they will request paternity testing to prove who the father is and address him with support. At least you'll have financial and medical assistance until the testing is done and probably afterwards. There seems to be a rash of fathers young and old backing out on their responsibility. Everyone sooner or later has to pay the piper. He may or may not have a change of heart after your baby is born. Do his parents know? They're going to want to believe his side but if the paternity proves he fathered your baby they can't argue with that. Don't waste your breath with them now. Wait until you have the proof.

I'm sure your family will be by your side to help you. Learn from this mistake and don't make this mistake again. You'll do fine. Life is a learning process so learn from this. Look ahead and never take a step back. Good luck.

Answer 6

At 8 months along, you have 2 choices. Either keep your baby or give him up for adoption. Have you told your parents yet? How do they feel about it, and are they willing to help you out? After your baby is born, you can petition for a paternity test, and after that comes back positive, the father will be obligated to pay child support, whether or not he wants to raise a child. There are lots of programs that can help you out... WIC can help you pay for formula, and I know that most areas have lots of parenting classes and groups for young moms, most of them even free! If you decide to give your baby up for adoption, you have lots of choices. Adoptions now leave more room for the birth family to make decisions. You can chose the family your child goes to, and in an open adoption, you can even see your baby or receive pictures and updates. Think carefully about this decision, as it doesn't just impact you! Good luck!

Answer 7

Don't concentrate to any person that is bashing you on right here, they are simply near-minded idiots, I'm sorry however it is real. I'm 17 years historic and I have a month historic child lady and I love her to demise. When I discovered I was once pregnant my boyfriend went out and bought a role and I got to work a few extra hours at my task and we each labored relatively rough at institution. Both people are almost virtually completed top institution now. We certainly not relatively had a trouble with individuals being impolite to us and what now not but additionally we certainly not relatively cared what individuals idea and could not care much less what they needed to say since we knew we each adored our unborn child and that we could do most likely the whole thing we would to be the exceptional viable mother and father for her. Just forget about any person who talks rudely to you, they are simply near-minded and believe that the whole thing teen goes to be a terrible mother or father and what now not(NOT real, we've got truthfully been instructed by means of medical professionals and public well being that we're truthfully relatively well mother and father and that our daughter is fortunate she has such satisfactory mother and father...all of it will depend on the character now not the age). If you want any person to speak to message me!

Answer 8

Big hugs to you, honey. I'm so glad you see this baby as a blessing.

You could put the baby up for adoption and ensure that it has a happy, healthy homelife.

Or, if you really feel strongly about keeping the baby, check your phone book for teen mother resources (Birthright, local hospital, etc). They can help you out. Talk to your school about the options you have for continuing your education with an infant. Check your local hospital or Birthright center for parenting classes to make the transition into active motherhood much easier. Apply for WIC to make sure you can afford good food and formula (if you choose not to, or can't breast feed.)

Hopefully, you'll get a collaboration and great answers here and the help you'll need. God bless.

Answer 9

Why don't you give the baby up for adoption to a couple who desperatly want a baby but cna't have one. The baby may be a blessing to you, but being born to a teenage mother with no support, no money and no chance at a future does not sound like a blessing for the child. You have to think beyond you own needs now, thats part of growing up and accepting responsibility.

Answer 10

Are your parents supporting you in keeping the baby? You are very young and I think it might be a good idea to go to a "parent" group for young Mom's. They can help you decide what course of action to take. If you decide to give the baby up for adoption remember that is a very selfless act full of love. You must put the baby first and decide what is best for her as I know that's what you want , the very best for your baby. Go talk to someone and let them help you through this. I wish you all the luck