Im dating a cop, he does 15 hr shifts. We only get to see eachother 1-2times a week. I want more time with him but he is usually really tired after work. He is really bad with scheduling things. I really care about him but i feel he loves his job more than me. what should i do to make things work?
2007-06-13 18:54:44 · 13 answers · asked by EDF 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Being with a cop takes unselfishness, understanding and a very strong woman. The fact that you are asking this question tells me you do not qualify. Dump him and move on so he can find another woman.
2007-06-13 18:57:39 · answer #1 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My best friend is a police officer, who is married to my other best friend Lisa. They have been married awhile, and they of course had an adjustment period, but they love oneanother enough to overcome any obstacles. They meet whenever possible while he is on shift, she gets up in the middle of the night, and I go watch their daughter. So they can go have a dinner date, or just sit and talk for a few minutes...He works graveyard.
The job cops have to do is a very stressful and fulfilling job. Anyone who dates a cop, or marries one knows that the time apart goes with the territory. I wouldn't look at it as his job is more important, I would look at it as he loves making the city you live in a safer place for you to live in. It is all in how you look at things, it is important to know that he loves you, or he would not spend the little time he has off with you. So he has made you a priority.
Just be patient, and love him for exactly what he is...time constraints and all. He will appreciate it, and you will love him more because of it.
Blessings
2007-06-14 02:05:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ugh. I just got out of a relationship with a cop and it can be really tough. You yourself just have to be built for it emotionally. Also, you're guy has to be happy with himself and where he is in his career or he will be unhappy no matter how much he loves you. You just have to be supportive and understand that he might not be able to spend more time with you. A cop needs a person who understands that and works with it. Also, you have to understand that cops are trained to hide their emotions, so don't count on him showering you with sappy crap.
At the end of the day, you just have to be the right person to be with a cop. It's a tough thing, but it can work as long as both of you understand why things are the way they are and can live with that.
My relationship didn't last, not because of time or because he's a cop, but because he just wasn;t happy with himself and his job so we both need time to better ourselves.
So just think about if you can continue to be happy with the way things are with you two. You should NEVER make him choose between you and work. It doesn't mean he loves work more than you. It's just what he has to do.
I feel you girl. More than you know.
2007-06-14 02:04:22 · answer #3 · answered by Karen 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You decide...
My hubby is working shift too. I dated for more than 10 year before we got married. Marrying a guy who works shift is a very challenging stunt for woman. I have to be independent in everything, even right up to some tough and rough times I had during my pregnancy. I need to have a clear mind and run the household myself. And be around specially on his off days to spend quality time with him...
The decision is yours. If you made up you mind to stick to him, these are some of those things I can tell you...
2007-06-14 02:01:19 · answer #4 · answered by aUDREy TTT 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
and he works for the lapd, right? he has a good career in law enforcement, you're about 40% takecare of. I also believed he can be a sole provider for a family of 4 with his salary if he wants. Good benefits, life insurance, healthcare, retirement's benefits, low rates on most loans. I don't see a reason why would you want to pass on that. And many more...
2007-06-14 02:07:11 · answer #5 · answered by Dongfeng!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, there isn't alot you can do about the long hours he works. Maybe he isn't right for you if it bothers you alot. You might be happier with someone with a 9 to 5 job. But isn't it nice to be with someone who loves thier job. There aren't alot of people out there like that!
2007-06-14 02:01:26 · answer #6 · answered by barbsleeps 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should talk to him about it, and if you feel like you'er being blowed off.... then he does love the job more than u. If there is a will, then its always a way. If he wants to spend more time with you as much as you do, then ya'll figure it out. good luck
2007-06-14 01:59:59 · answer #7 · answered by 1badlady06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my husband is joining the police force and im quite certain he would be crushed if i left him because of how many hours he has to work. Police officeres are short staffed and get paid crap, so they actually benefit from working those long hours, i mean we all have to eat right,
2007-06-14 01:57:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Check his schedule and his days off and work around his schedule.
2007-06-14 01:58:27 · answer #9 · answered by don n 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust him
2007-06-14 01:57:38 · answer #10 · answered by SLA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋