what does this mean?

Question

My boyfriend and I were talking on the phone one day. We were both fine, but he kept saying things like, I don't deserve you and "get your man". He has self-esteem issues at times and is quite sarcastic and mean at times with his choice of words. Anyways, he had to take a call on his other line and he said that he would call me back. 10 min passed and I started to get impatient...then i called him twice. no answer. Then, I text him saying sarcastically, "thanks for calling me back. hope everything's fine. goodnight. I wasn't being sarcastic when i wrote "I hope everthings fine." though. Maybe he took it as sarcasm. he text me back 2 min later saying, "Sarcasm is not your strong point. Im in the hospital...thanksforyour support..please do not respond. I did by apologizing twice. inthepasHe said he loves me to death. I've called him about 4 times in 3 days. He hasn't answered nor return my calls since. it's been almost 2 weeks.is he mad, busy, in the hospital or a family in the hospital

he also said that we'd make time over the summer to spend time with each other...he is somewhat insecure..But he would never lie to me about being in the hospital...

Answer 1

He's manipulting you and as long as you let him play with your feelings he'll continue to do so. If your into games and trying to second guess how to talk to or what to say to someone you should be able to feel relaxed around then he's your guy. He did something wrong and when called on it twisted it around to make it your fault. He's taking the spotlight off his rudeness and throwing a glare back on you. Perhaps he doesn't want to deal with the light on him because it may not be so favorable (maybe the call was another girl). I couldn't handle second guessing myself and trying to make him happy when no matter what I'd do he'd make me feel like I still was a disappointment. Life is to short to be wasted on people who make you feel this way.

Answer 2

This is just my humble opinion... he has control issues. He likes to push your buttons but when you finally stand up for yourself he then backs you into a corner to feel badly about yourself. He's testing to see how much he can get away with. I dated a young man like that for 4 years and he could make me so angry I would end up screaming into the phone at him and then crying and apologizing for being so awful when the whole fight started because I would catch him in a lie. It took me a long time to see how manipulative he actually was and the number he did on my self esteem was HUGE. The advise I would give you is to decide, what you will and won't put up with, what is acceptable boyfriend behavior and what behavior is bad for you. I know he may feel like the love of your life but the truth is that someone worth loving and someone that truly loves you is going to go out of his way not to hurt you, he's going to be kind and most importantly he's going to make you feel good about being with him, not all tied up in knots. Love should be happy, it's not always easy but it shouldn't hurt to be in love with someone. Good luck and believe in yourself and your instincts.

Answer 3

Well I found I don't get good reception in a hospital, have you tried visiting him at all? I would assume you mean he's in a lobby or something not in a bed, but either way try going down to the hospital and talking face to face, phones are so impersonal I hate the little things

Answer 4

His comment about the sarcasm wasnt for the "hope everything's fine" comment...it was for the "thanks for calling me back" comment.

I think you should text him back with a simple message.

"Last thing I heard was that you were going to call me back. 15 minutes later you tell me you are in a hospital and sarcastically thanked me for support. Please explain to me how the hell I was supposed to know you were in the hospital?"

Quite honestly, the signals he is sending is quite clear. He does not want a relationship with you.

The best thing to do is move on. If he is interested, he will try once again to contact you. If not, then you save yourself some time and you arent knocking on a door that is going to remained locked.

Answer 5

do you love him, if so let him know, keep trying until he responds. some times people need a little time to come around, especially if they are going though something. just let him know that you did not mean what you said in a ugly way, and that if he wants to talk you will be there for him. when things cool down let him know that it is not okay for him to say mean things to you either, don't let him form bad habits with you stop them in there tracks if not it will only get worse, and from here on out you watch what you say too. don't ever say anything out of anger to anyone, you might end up regretting your words.

Answer 6

Wow he is a jerk...i dont think anyone deserves a guy like this. he really could be in the hospital but if it's been 2 weeks he's probably not. and somehting tells me he wasn't in the hospital anyways. i think you deserve better.

Answer 7

Personally, (if i were a woman) I would just wait it out. If he still has something for you and comes back to you even a little bit (maybe like probing to see your feelings) you can let loose. But if you really have a problem with his "rudeness," and you feel like letting him go, do it.

Answer 8

Sorry but he sounds like a drama queen - A real man wouldn't leave you in the dark

Answer 9

Hate to break it to you, but your boyfriend's a wuss. If he's saying stuff like, "I don't deserve you," or, "Get your man," he's showing an extreme lack of confidence in himself and lots of neediness. If he holds you higher than himself, don't even bother.

Answer 10

Even if he really is in the hospital he's still an idiot.
Stop wasting your time.