why does my boyfriend keep pressuring me to get a job?

Question

Me and my boyfriend think i'm expecting. Although, we're not 100% sure that i'm pregnant, there's a good chance that I am. I already have a son which my mom has been helping me support since his father neglected him and abandoned me when I was pregnant. I came down with depression after I had him and i'm just barely recuperating since I started taking anti-depressants.

So right now we're searching for a studio apartment (me and by b/f).Anyhow, my boyfriend keeps bugging me to get a job and I feel like he is pressuring me. He knows I just dropped out of high school recently, and i've been taking care of my baby. I'm happy that I'm finally staying with him because when I was taking him to the day care he got anemic since the sitters never payed any attention to him and never gave him his food or baby cereal. They only gave him formula.

And now that I'm feelig better (depression-wise) and that I stay with my baby my boyfriend decides that I NEED to get a job ASAP. What the hell?

Answer 1

Your b/f needs help paying the bills. Your son's dad needs to be paying some child support. You have a son, might be pregnant, and you are living with your bf. Time to grow up, and contribute to the support of the group. If this guy dumps you, you still need to pay your way in the world.
Anti depressants are good for getting you back on your feet; being self sufficient is good, too. Get a job, and a GED.

Answer 2

I'm not trying to be cruel here, but what the heck are you doing having another baby when you can't take care of the one you have without help? I also suffer depression and once on pills, you don't need to recover and you CAN work. Your boyfriend has every right to expect you to work, why should he take care of you and your other child that isn't his? You should be glad he is even staying around to be with you. Get a job or he might leave, then where would you be?

Answer 3

What a sorry excuse for a woman. Get some birth control. Quit being a baby factory. Why didn't you learn the first time, stupid. Maybe he wants you to get a job because he doesn't want to support your lazy butt. He knows as well as I do that you got pregnant just so he would have to take care of you. So what are you going to do when he leaves you like the last one and now you have two kids without fathers? Grow up!!!!

Answer 4

It sounds like you are still a teenager. You don't say how old the boyfriend is either. To me, it sounds like you need to get YOUR LIFE IN ORDER FIRST!!!!
First -You need to find out for sure if you are pregnant or not. If you are not -I would suggest that you get on some form of birth control ASAP ( as soon as possible!!!!!). If you don't get on birth control - you will probably end up pregnant again.
Secondly - you need to see if your high school has some sort of alternative program so that you can at least get your GED (general equivalency degree). If your high school is no help - perhaps there is a program in the community where you live that can help with getting your GED. You will make a bit more money WITH A HIGH SCHOOL DIPLOMA OR GED THAN WITH OUT EITHER ONE. Think about going back to school for the sake of your baby. Hopefully you will want to make a good life for you and your child.
Is the boyfriend working at all? Is he making enough to support the two (or perhaps three of you)? Perhaps - he is worried about not making wnough to pay the bills and feels like you having a job would be helpful. (This is only a guess).
If you are not on any sort of depression medication -perhaps you need to talk to a doctor about getting a perscription. It sounds like you still have quite a bit of stress right now.
Please thank your mom for her support while this has been going on. She sounds like she is a real lifesaver.
I don't know if your high school has some sort of program where there is day care for young mothers like yourself. Make sure to check out this option.
Eventually you will get your life straightened out and will turn out to be a strong youg woman with a GED and than perhaps you will think about the possibility of college. HANG IN THERE- LIKE THEY SAY WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU WILL MAKE YOU STRONGER!!!!!!

Answer 5

In this day and age,supporting a family is expensive , and a lot of mothers work. You can't expect to have some one totally take care of you and your children. You need to take some of the responsibility . If you want to live to gather as man and wife, while then be a wife.

Answer 6

Umm yeah why wouldn't you get a job? I mean two checks are better than one....If you are expecting what do you expect that baby to eat? In additon yourself and your first child?

Let's be real you need to get a job to help support your family. This will help to provide alot of vitamins and iron from good healthy food to your children.

Answer 7

I understand what youre going through so in order to please him and take care of yourself ( which is the most important thing) get something part-time in an atmosphere you like. For instance if you love to shop get a part-time gig in a mall. That way the depression wont kick your butt and you'll have a few earned dollars.

Answer 8

You need to take care of your baby first, when he is old enough to go to school, then you can get a part time job, but you need to put your baby first

Answer 9

You sound like the type of person who if the BF was to say, you can stay home, & I'll goto work, that you would still expect him to do his half of the cleaning of the place.

Answer 10

i went to college full time, had 3 kids, and worked 25 hours a week *and did i mention i was a single parent, husband passed away*. you can do it too. your not disabled because you had a child. and you cant expect him to take care of all 4 of you *if your pg* on his own.
good luck!