I've been 'involved" on and off with a guy for 21/2 years, but he would never fully committ to me. Three months ago, he met a woman and they have both fallen madly in love with eachother. He told me that he wants to marry her, and as far as I'm concerned, it's either friendship or nothing. I'm not sure which is worse. He's not going to make a very good husband because he has no money, no car, and is not a very good provider, so maybe I should settle for friendship, and I'll be better off in the end. What sucks though, is that I'm hopelessly in love with him. What should I do?
2007-06-13 14:47:32 · 19 answers · asked by sporty 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sounds like you have know choice but to move on.
2007-06-13 14:49:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
I'd say that it's good a idea not too see him very often until at least some time after the marriage (if that's anytime soon). Don't explicitly tell him about your plans (whatever they are), just don't contact him all that often and try to avoid him a bit. He probably wouldn't mind much, being so in love with the other woman as he is. Perhaps the feeling on your part will wear off a bit (give it a few months), and then you have the possibility of renewing contact with him, this time as just friends. I've been in the same situation and it worked for me.
2007-06-13 14:57:26 · answer #2 · answered by dddhgg 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you say you've been "involved" with someone who would not fully commit, then you were never "with" them. You're asking if you should settle for friendship with someone who doesnt seem to have too much going on for themselves. So ask yourself what it is exactly that you're getting out of whatever relationship it seems that you guys have. As far as I'm concerned, let him go off and be merry with his other lady... she's doing you a huge favor.
2007-06-13 14:53:07 · answer #3 · answered by Shay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it will suck for awhile - but cut the strings now. If you remain friends you will always think about him in that "loving" way. He may never marry that other girl - so you could still have a shot. But, should his relationship not work out, then he can call you - do not wait for him. Just sit down with him and tell him the truth - explain how you feel about him and that it is just too hard for you to remain friends with him. Should something change, tell him to call you - and - if he is lucky, you might be available. Good luck!
2007-06-13 14:52:54 · answer #4 · answered by DAB 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u love someone u can never be just friends.avoid him....at all costs .....his calls,his presence,make up an imaginary boyfriend.....anything just stay away from him.....if he didn't want 2 commit 2 u,it means he was not so into u.every time u talk 2 him its like piecing u'r heart with a knife and then pullin it out.......don't settle 4 nothin.........that isn't selfish......that is acceptin that u deserve better.always think about his weakness and lack of money.....that also helps.
2007-06-13 15:12:30 · answer #5 · answered by sherry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Settle for friendship. If you go any farther,he's going to think that you are a stalker and get a restraining order on you. I think you just need to move on, he wasn't that good anyway! He didn't love you if he didn't stay with you and get married!
2007-06-13 14:51:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him alone. He has made it clear that you are not the one for him. It is too soon for you to try to be his friend. Your feelings for him are too strong and your heart will continually be trampled on. Give it some time and maybe you can be good friends some day, but for now you need to keep your distance.
2007-06-13 14:53:44 · answer #7 · answered by Lady J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say that you are better off cutting the ties. It sounds like he has kept you around off and on while he waited for someone else to come along. Probably someone who would support him. You already know what you should do. :) Best of luck to you.
2007-06-13 14:51:44 · answer #8 · answered by kbrmechanics 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
c wt i feel is u shld rather sit calmly and c wt his action is. b in touch wid him so as to satisfy ur emotions. bt dont command anyth from him, let him undstd wt he act. wants and also c how long he can carry the rela he has and also b his pal, ask abt d rela., try2gve a shouldr so that he can pour all d frustrations and challenges on u and hve benifit 4m it.
2007-06-13 14:55:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either tell him your hopelessly in love with him, or just be friends but imagine it's more than just friends and that he's just as hopelessly in love♥
2007-06-13 14:51:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
start off with a friendship maybe u guys can get together some day
2007-06-13 14:57:52 · answer #11 · answered by kball194 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋